Exotic, Interesting Food? Blah. Or, What I Do When I'm Not Cooking

It's that time of year again--the dead, cold, dreary D.C. winter.  The time of year where I can't even think about the yummy flavor combinations that complement cilantro, and tomatoes are only for soup and marinara sauce.  All I want is an I.V. of hot chocolate--it can even be the cheapo Swissmiss kind just GIVEITTOMENOWBEFOREITOTALLYFREAKOUTMAN! And don't even think about trying to feed me a cold vegetable. What's that you say? It's organic swiss chard wrapped with the most exquisite white truffle and served with tears of joy? Is it cold? Then f*** off.

Needless to say, we've been eating alot of heavy, uninspired dishes in our house lately, and my mood and my waistline are paying the price. Luckily it'll be Spring again oh so soon, and then I'll be back in action. Until then, I thought I'd give you a lil taste of what I, Princess BaCon, get up to when I'm not slaving away in my kitchen. 

I channel the rockstar, her Majesty the Queen of Deliciousness and Ass-Kicking, Lady Gaga. 
As you can tell, this is a consuming and makeup-laden affair.   Apparently 5 wigs isn't enough, as I've exhausted each of them before March. 

In sum, when I'm not cooking I spend 45 minutes putting on eye makeup, fake hair, and crazy shoes and then I get drunk in public.

I also get crafty.  Mr. Luz pulled a miracle, finding our dream rowhouse at rent we could afford.  But the kitchen was, oddly enough, my least favorite room in the house. (Perhaps that's why I drink so much when I cook?) In the before picture, we'd already pulled off all the wonderfully greasy cabinet doors, but you get the picture. And I have no idea how the linoleum got that nasty, but it felt like walking on 30 years of caked on mud. So, we woke up one morning, and over coffee decided to overhaul it. That day.

Our plan went something like this-Me: "Let's do something sort of retro, since we have all these retro appliances anyway." Mr. Luz: "Ok." Off we go to the Home Depot for robin's egg blue and vanilla paint, chrome-looking hardware, and some shiny black and white floor tiles.  TaDa!

So when I'm not cooking, Mr. Luz and I scrub, sand, nail, paint stuff funny colors and lay floor tiles and then I brag about our "home renovations" as if I just re-installed our entire gas line blindfolded, with one arm tied behind my back, uphill both ways.


  1. Wow I *love* the kitchen! I like that color of blue, and I have always loved black and white tiles...

    It is so refreshing to have something new and different in your house, isn't it? Especially when you did the work yourself - a good feeling of accomplishment.

  2. Looks great!!! what did the landlord think????

  3. Oh chica that's awesome!

    BTW, I'm in Oregon visiting with friends, and the 10-year-old boy LOVES Lady Gaga, so tonight I will show him your pictures and induct him to his first impromptu basement Gaga Dance Party (sadly the wigs shall be imaginary)! The boys already rolled around for hours in the huge pile of beads and throws that I brought (always a suitcase just for that). It's so cool to be the New Orleans Auntie.

  4. LOOOVE IT!!! Didn't Julia Child have powder blue kitchen?

  5. Thanks guys!! I think it was "true love" once we got it all done...Pluce and I couldn't stop gazing lovingly at our little kitchen for a few weeks. And you may be right, Carrie. I watched her PBS show, but I think she had a few kitchens over time though I'll have to check out the "iconic" one that they recreated at the Smithsonian here in D.C. and get back to you.

  6. Well played guys, the kitchen looks amazing!...and thanks for the nod to our gas line hell ;) Let me know when you're ready to tackle some spackle, lol.