Bacon Concentrate

Do You Groupon?

2010-12-31T09:09:00.000-08:00

So my good friend and co-worker, LRB, tells this joke. A man comes home and finds an elephant sitting rather unhappily in his living room. Immediately he calls his wife and asks "What's with the elephant?" and she replies "What? It was on sale!"

Sexism aside, that joke summarizes a kick we've been on since, oh, August of 2008, to seek out and take advantage of great deals. We paid for one and only one item of furniture in our comfy living room (it's a leather-topped, carved mahogany coffee table from we got at cut-rate from a self-described "junk shop." I love it.) The generous people of Craigslist provided us with two large bookcases, a charming leather wingback chair, and a burgundy damask print couch with carved wooden accents--all for free. Similarly, our dining room set, which can seat 8 (and includes an awesome dining room table Mr. Luz made out of an old farmhouse door bolted to two cast-iron sewing machine treadle bases) cost less than a plane ticket to NOLA. And I won't tell you how little we spent to kit out our kitchen. Apparently rich D.C. folks regularly give things like unused KitchenAid standmixers to the Salvation Army to sell to people like me for $20. Ok, so, we love getting great stuff for little to no moolah.

Which is why we love Groupon.com. If you're not checking Groupon regularly, you're really missing out on great deals. As I understand it, Groupon goes out and bargains with businesses in major cities across the country for deals like half-priced spa packages, restaurant gift certificates, cases of wine, and otherwise pricey adventure experiences (including sky-diving, ropes courses, hot-air ballooning) in exchange for the advertising and new customers that a Groupon deal inevitably brings to the business. And oh, do we take advantage of those deals.

As a food lover, obviously most of my disposable income goes to food, wine, and gadgets-but mostly food. (See above re: cheap gadgets). As a reader, I assume that to some extent that's true for you as well. So it's incumbent upon me to share with you my knowledge of how to get more wonderful food and wine for less disposable income. Groupon. Thanks to Groupon, I've been able to eat for half-price in New Orleans, St. Louis, and time and time again in D.C. And now I'll be doing some fine dining for half-off at home, too. Yep-for a mere $40.49, Igourmet.com and Kansas City Steak Co. delivered to my front door just yesterday: 2 lbs. of gourmet cheeses, including a raw aged sheep's milk manchego from Spain and a blue cheese from the oldest purveyors in France, and 6 lbs. of wet-aged bone-in NY strip steaks. My head exploded a little, just typing that. I paid $1.49 for two pounds of gourmet cheese!! Seriously, I can't think of a clever way to end this post, and now all I can think about is the sharp, musky aged provolone cheese sitting in my fridge right now. So....I'm going to go eat some. Groupon. Do it.

It's Soup (and Alliteration?) Season: Sweet Potato and Sausage Soup Recipe

2010-11-27T00:38:00.000-08:00

Hey guess what. It's winter again. And with winter comes many guilty pleasures to pass the time and make the frigid temperatures more bearable. These guilty pleasures include Ugg boots (atrocious, but so cozy), Grey's Anatomy on the T.V., snuggies, and booze-spiked beverages that are otherwise completely innocent, like coffee, hot chocolate, and cider. Hell, in winter, they even add stronger booze to already-boozy drinks! (see: port wine, mulled wine, and tequila-ed wine. Ok, I made that last one up.)

Amidst all this decadence, it can be hard to eat healthy UNLESS you have a good stash of broth in your freezer for soups (which you should. Shrimp shells, crawfish shells, crab shells, steak bones, chicken bones, lamb bones, turkey bones--they all make excellent stock with a little water and a long simmer. DO IT.) Soups can take a not so fantastic out-of-season tomato and turn it into a dark, complex dish. They can also take anything in your fridge and turn it into a meal with the right care and a stash of dried lentils nearby.

This soup recipe seems so simple and straightforward, it's hard to imagine that something sweet, spicy, fresh, and satisfying can result, but it does. The sweet potatoes add body, color, and sweet earthiness to broth that's made richer with the sausage while brighter with the spinach. All of this comes together in a satisfying, healthy soup. This recipe is courtesy of Bon Appetite magazine, with some edits and notes of my own.

Satisfying Sweet Potato & Sausage Soup Recipe:

2 Tbs. olive oil
10 oz. cooked linguiça sausage or chorizo sausage, cut crosswise into 1/4-inch-thick slices (see note below re: uncooked sausage, which I prefer here)
2 medium onions, chopped
2 large garlic cloves, minced
2 lbs. sweet potatoes (about 2 large), peeled, cut into 1/2 inch thick semi circles
1 pound baking (I use yukon gold) potatoes, peeled, cut into 1/2 inch thick semi circles
6 cups low-salt chicken broth
1 9 oz. bag fresh spinach
salt and pepper to taste

Heat oil in heavy large pot over medium-high heat. Add cooked (see note below re: uncooked sausage) sausage; cook until brown, stirring often, about 8 minutes. Transfer sausage to a bowl.

Add onions and garlic to pot and cook until translucent, stirring often, about 5 minutes. Add all potatoes, reduce heat, and cook until potatoes begin to soften, stirring often, about 12 minutes. (When things start burning on the bottom of the pot, I move onto the next step) Add broth; bring to boil, scraping up browned bits.

Reduce heat to medium-low, cover, and simmer until potatoes are soft, stirring occasionally, about 20 minutes. Using potato masher, mash some of potatoes in pot. Add browned sausage and any collected juices to the soup. Turn off heat. Stir in spinach just before serving. Season with salt and pepper. Divide among bowls and serve.

NOTE: I made this soup with a buffalo and pork chipotle chorizo sausage that a friend gifted me and Mr. Luz. It was AWESOME and I'd recommend buffalo chorizo if you can find it. The flavor's just amazing.

Uncooked sausage is less compact than cooked sausages and therefore will absorb the broth for a more satisfying experience, though it adds one more step to the process.

To make this recipe with buffalo chorizo or some other uncooked chorizo, use vegetable oil instead of olive oil, and brown the whole chorizo in the oil. If it still isn't cooked, add 1 inch of water to the pot, cover, and simmer until the sausages are firm but not hard. Remove the sausages to a bowl and slice upon cooling, being careful to retain any juices to add to the soup later. Boil off as much water as you can from the vegetable oil and sausage flavoring before adding the vegetables to the pot and commencing with the above recipe.

Read More http://www.bonappetit.com/recipes/2007/10/sweet_potato_and_sausage_soup#ixzz15rI8RF1b

Happy Thanksgiving!

2010-11-24T01:18:00.000-08:00

We can't celebrate Thanksgiving here at BaCon without recalling the most outrageous one we've celebrated to date. It was 2007, and Mr. Luz and I had been dating for a little more than a year. He'd just said "I love you" and then promptly moved to New York City, then Paris, France until January 2008. (Law school wasn't hard enough for Mr. Luz, he had to go to Paris to study law in French.) It was difficult, but I got to fly to Paris three times in one semester, including Thanksgiving and New Year's Eve. Somehow, I survived.
The only way to really sum up that Thanksgiving is to come out with it. We made a Turducken. The Turducken is medieval preparation given new life in NOLA. Essentially, a deboned chicken is stuffed inside a deboned duck, which is stuffed inside a deboned turkey. Its rich excess is borderline offensive for most non-New Orleanian Americans, so you can only imagine what our French guests thought. Poor, poor French guests.

It took three days and several trips to the butcher and the American Section of the Bon Marche in downtown Paris (where we found canned cranberry sauce to serve as a bit of a joke even though I love it, cajun seasoning, single cans of Dr. Pepper, and 12 types of pancake mix) to prepare The Turducken. Mr. Luz and his flatmate and landlord, Beube (Bob, with a French accent) spent hours deboning each bird, layering them together and seasoning each layer, and then stitching the whole thing up.

I, on the other hand, spent days drinking wine, sighing happily, and making stuffing and then pumpkin pie in shallow, frozen tart pastry shells.

In line with NOLA custom, our Turducken was stuffed with traditional herb dressing and New Orleans sausage and corn bread stuffing, and it tasted heavenly. While it roasts, the duck fat permeates the turducken so it becomes self-basting and everything starts to taste like...well...duck fat.

In addition to The Turducken, we had cornbread, green beans, homemade cranberry sauce, sweet potato casserole, mashed potatoes and gravy, a cheese course, chocolate truffles, the aforementioned pumpkin pie/tart, and wine. Lots and lots of glorious wine and champagne (presumably to make amends with our French guests for subjecting them to our holiday of obscene excess.)

It was an experience I'll never forget and reinforces the saying, "you never know where you might end up." It just might be Paris, France, eating four whole animals all at once and drinking wine older than you are in celebration of our many blessings. In other words, let's start planning for 2011.

Fruits of Your Labor: Sweet & Spicy Pumpkin Bread Recipe

2010-11-22T07:24:00.000-08:00

I loathe paying some one to do something I'm capable of doing myself. This particular personality quirk means I give myself wretched haircuts, knit my own lopsided scarves, and make my own ill-designed stationery with my discontinued Japanese screen-printing machine. It also means that housekeeping is constantly on my To Do List.

In response to the never-ending housekeeping, and after a few tense months in La Casa de Luz y Lee, Mr. Luz developed a chore chart to track our individual contributions to the household. We avoided it for a long time because of the stigma that comes with "keeping score," but Mr. Luz in his wisdom decided that keeping score is exactly what we need. As in, he's initiated an informal contest to see who can do more around the house and we keep track on the chore chart. I have to say, I take certain joy shoving him out of the way to put my initials in the "Cooking" box, and I really love to see both of our initials side by side next to "Laundry."

Last night because of the Chore Chart, after work I cooked two meals and baked my seasonal favorite, Spicy & Sweet Pumpkin Bread in a clean kitchen, and we finished the laundry, and squeezed in a movie, knitting, and reading all before midnight. Domestic bliss doesn't even begin to describe it.

This recipe makes one 8 x 4 or larger loaf of Pumpkin Bread and 6 dense, cakey Pumpkin Muffins or two loaves of Pumpkin Bread. The muffins and bread are both moist without being greasy, and flavorful without being too sweet. I serve mine with a room-temperature honeyed goat cheese and it's almost too decadent to describe, with the rich, warm spiciness of the pumpkin and the sweet, earthy tang of the goat cheese. And you don't need any special equipment to make these-everything must be mixed by hand and just until uniform, otherwise your batter will toughen. You can also easily alter the recipe to suit it to your preferences/the contents of your pantry.

Some variations include adding: sunflower seeds, chocolate chips, butterscotch chips, golden raisins, a cream cheese filling (cream cheese mixed with powdered sugar and vanilla, which you'll just spoon onto half of the batter in the loaf pan or muffin tin before carefully covering it with the rest of the batter) Also, if you don't have garam masala, plain cinnamon will do. The garam masala adds some spice and intrigue with pepper, cardamom, and star anise. Finally, using all white sugar won't impart as much dark molasses flavor as using some brown and some white sugar, but the bread will be tasty nonetheless.

Spicy & Sweet Pumpkin Bread or Muffins Recipe

1 Can pumpkin puree (15 oz.)
4 Eggs
1 Cup vegetable oil
2/3 Cup water
2 Cups packed brown sugar
1 Cup white sugar
3 1/3 Cups unbleached or all-purpose flour
2 tsp. baking soda
2 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp. ground ginger
1 1/2 tsp. garam masala spice
1 tsp. nutmeg
1 cup of chopped dried cranberries and walnuts/almonds (optional)

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees and grease and flour your loaf and/or muffin pans.

In a large bowl, combine the wet ingredients (the first four). In a separate bowl, combine the remaining dry ingredients.

While stirring the pumpkin mixture with a fork, add in the flour mixture and stir until just combined. With a spatula, fold in the nuts and dried fruit (optional) and pour into your baking pans. Bake the muffins for 35 minutes and check for doneness (knife inserted in the middle comes out clean). Continue baking just until the muffins are done and then remove to a cooling rack. Bake the loaf pans for 50 minutes and check for doneness. Continue baking until the loaves are done then remove to a cooling rack.

Tips:

It's best to get these muffins and loaves out of the pan asap so they don't steam and get soggy. Run a knife around the edge of the loaf/muffins, let them rest for approx. 10 minutes, then carefully remove them to a cooling rack.
These baked goods are great candidates for the Bread Trick. Tear a slice of bread into small pieces and scatter them around the loaf/muffins before covering them for storage. The bread will absorb the oxygen and become stale while the bread will remain soft.
You can freeze a tightly wrapped loaf of pumpkin bread for a few months. Thaw in a warm space and then heat before serving.

BaCon's Virgins and Veterans Crawfish Boil, 2010!

2010-11-20T11:17:00.000-08:00

Hey ya'll, it's me again. And I come bearing excuses, one for each of you! Now, now, don't shove, there are plenty to go around.

Yes, I've stayed away for awhile. At first, I was on a post-litigation high. I get a lot of satisfaction from working late nights with nothing but my work, a pizza, and a smuggled bottle of wine to keep me company at the office. So I did that for a few months and wallowed in the strange sickness of an occasional workaholic. There's also that pesky Gaga obsession that has led me to make/wear fourteen costumes since I last blogged. Now that I've counted, I'm sort of embarrassed. Errr. Moving on.

After that, things got weird in la casa de Luz y Lee, and cooking felt more like a burden than a reprieve. So I threatened to move to the guest house and live in tidy, well fed, laundered splendor ALL BY MYSELF DAMNIT. NOTE: We don't have a guest house. Happily, Mr. Luz and I have worked through those problems and we again share (the benefits AND burdens of) tidy, well fed, laundered splendor.

Now, we just have too many ridiculously awesome friends, which gets to the point of this post. (Only one paragraph later than usual, I might add.) After reading through my old posts, I realize that I complained a lot about D.C. and 2009 in general. Much has changed, and though it would make my imaginary therapist cringe to hear me say this, 2010 has been amazing and it's because of my friends.

The realization that we are truly blessed here in D.C. hit me with full force at our First Annual Veterans n' Virgins Crawfish Boil. One sunny day in May, we rolled an icy cold keg of beer on to our twee front yard in downtown D.C. and got ready to boil the 120 lbs. of live crawfish that FedEx delivered from Louisiana that morning.

The front yard was packed with happy people enjoying the Spring day. Some of them were crawfish veterans and Tulane alum, most just adventurous people ready to try something new and unique to the land we live in in our dreams and speak of often, NOLA. All of them were sexy, sexy people and that's really what matters, isn't it? I digress.

The afternoon began with a demonstration of how to pinch da tail and suck da heads for the virgins, and for the next 4 hours, we sipped Ramos Gin Fizzes (thanks, NickV!) and beer and ate through all but a few pounds of the crawfish as well as the garlic, corn, andouille and smoked sausages, and artichokes we threw in da boil with the mudbugs.

As day turned into night, everyone stayed around and a few more showed up for more cocktails, some impromptu cajun fiddle playing (thanks again, NickV) and a concert by the ladies, who all raided the costume closet before belting out Salt n' Peppa songs (remember those?! Of course you do) in the living room and then outside while marching around the block. In sum, it started sunny and spicy and ended up wild and weird--I don't know what more I can ask for.

That day more than any so far, I felt like I was in the middle of a big and ever-expanding family where things are fun, easy, and open-hearted. Really, although we were trying to bring a little NOLA to our friends that day, they brought it to us instead. That feeling still overwhelms me when I look at the pictures on this post, and it's something I'll never forget. Thanks again to our friends in D.C.-you guys make my divided heart (one half here, one half in NOLA) so, so happy.

Wino Homemade Chocolate Cake Recipe

2010-06-09T16:31:00.000-07:00

Hey ya'll. If you read my earlier post, you know for the past 6 weeks I've been prepping for and then making my debut as a Baby Lawyer. Well. I'm officially a Debutante.

When the hearing started, the (40+) lawyers and expert witnesses in the hearing room didn't know my name. And anyone in their twenties who has put on a suit that costs a month's rent knows what its like for a suit to wear you, rather than the other way around. Then, I put the tiniest of hurtings on a few expert witnesses on cross-examination, successfully argued against opposing counsel's objections, and managed to protect my (amazing) witness during her cross-examination with some coaching and objections of my own. And all of the sudden I'm the Homecoming Queen of the trial. During every break, seasoned attorneys and experts who I very much respect wanted to chat with me about a.) the case b.) NOLA c.) how old they are and how many trials they've been in or d.) "my cross-examination style." Everyone knows my name, and says things like "we were just talking about you" when I walk into the room, and now, I wear the suit.

It's been pretty amazing. And all that positive recognition has gone a long way to fortify me against the challenges that have come with the victories. (The security of govt. employment + a strict personnel policy of "avoidance"=the worst co-workers get rewarded, not punished. Yay! Put them on my cases! Give them a sense of entitlement, so they think they have a "right" to under-perform, and an abusive personality while you're at it, whee!)

Last week, after a particularly rough day, I spent the evening with a bottle of wine, the Hershey's website, and my kitchen. I guess you could say that on that particular day, the positive recognition and my general feeling of "badass lawyerness" wasn't getting me through. So after a few hours, I had a tasty, moist chocolate cake with a chocolately, not-too-sweet rich and smooth icing, and a good buzz. And all of the sudden, nothing else really mattered. To that I say, thank you for small miracles and I think I'll have another piece.

Hershey's Kitchens Dark Chocolate Cake Recipe:

2 cups sugar
1-3/4 cups all-purpose flour
3/4 cup HERSHEY'S Cocoa or HERSHEY'S SPECIAL DARK Cocoa
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1 1/2 teaspoons baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
2 eggs
1 cup milk
1/2 cup vegetable oil
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1 cup boiling water

Heat oven to 350°F. Grease and flour two 9-inch round pans or one 13x9x2-inch baking pan. (I used one 9 inch springform pan and just let it bake a little longer.)

Stir together the sugar, flour, cocoa, baking powder, baking soda and salt in large bowl. Add eggs, milk, oil and vanilla; beat on medium speed of electric mixer 2 minutes. Stir in boiling water (batter will be thin). Pour the batter into prepared pans.

Bake 30 to 35 minutes for round pans, 35 to 40 minutes for rectangular pan or until wooden pick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool 10 minutes; remove from pans to wire racks. Cool completely. Frost with "perfectly chocolate" frosting, recipe below.

Hershey's Perfectly Chocolate Frosting

1/2 cup (1 stick) butter or margarine
2/3 cup HERSHEY'S Cocoa
2 1/2 cups powdered sugar
1/3 cup milk
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

Melt butter. Stir in cocoa. Alternately add powdered sugar and milk, beating to spreading consistency. Add small amount additional milk, if needed. Stir in vanilla. About 2 cups frosting.

Seafood Paella (or Paella Valenciana), on the Grill!

2010-05-15T10:05:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer: I make no claims about how "authentic" this recipe is. I try to write recipes that are true to the time-honored and time-consuming cooking techniques of the originators, while keeping in mind that most folks don't have pimento wood laying around for a true Jamaican jerk experience, for example.

After months of research, I've learned that paella-making varies with each cook, so there isn't any one "authentic" paella recipe. But you can't go wrong with seafood, garlic, and a grill-so use this recipe as a backbone for your own paella-making approach and have some fun.

Traditional paella is made over an open flame in a large, handled paella pan. A lot of recipes call for cooking the paella over two burners on your stove, or sauteing then baking the dish. My recipe is even easier, and there are a lot of benefits to cooking the paella on the grill. One, your kitchen doesn't heat up, so it's great for summer. Also, people are impressed when you can cook more than brats and burgers over an open flame. (Why? I have no idea, but try it and you'll see what I mean.) Finally, grilling the chicken and chorizo while you make your sofrito saves some time and adds the perfect smokiness to the dish that you don't get from sauteing them on your stove.

This recipe can feed approximately 8 people, so plan on leftovers or call some friends. Paella is even better the next day, so you can legitimately have guests over for "leftovers" with this recipe, and they will love you for it.

And I've said it before, but if you cook at home, there's no reason why you can't take the chicken carcass and the shrimp shells and make your own stock. It's easy, healthy, and will save you loads of money. I can't tell you how many times I've been able to make last minute meals making soups or risottos with whatever is in my fridge/pantry and some homemade stock from the freezer. Think about it.

Paella Valenciana with Shrimp, Squid, Chorizo, Chicken, and Clams Recipe

1 whole chicken, skinned and cut into thighs, drumsticks, and breast pieces and seasoned w/saltpepper
8 cloves garlic, minced
3 ripe tomatoes, chopped (some say to "grate the tomatoes." That thought grosses me out)
1 medium onion, chopped
3 Tbs. olive oil
4 cups shrimp stock, fish stock, or clam juice
Large pinch saffron
2 cups arborio or another short-grained rice (important-the rice has to absorb the broth. Short grained rices do this well)
1 lb. uncooked shrimp, peeled but with tails intact
1/2 lb. chorizo sausage, pierced with a knife in several places
3-4 whole uncooked squid, with the bodies cut into rings
12-15 uncooked clams, scubbed
1 cup peas (can use frozen + thawed)
1 yellow and 1 red bell pepper, cut into strips
2 tsp. salt, more to taste
2 tsp. smoked paprika
3 Thyme sprigs
3 lemons, cut into wedges
Black pepper to taste

Bring the stock to a boil, then add the saffron. Keep the broth/saffron covered and simmering on low for at least 1 hour before you add it to the paella.

Prepare the grill for direct medium-high heat (If you're using your weber kettle, fill the charcoal chimney up with coals. Once they are hot, dump them into the middle of your grill and add 8 or so cold coals on top of the hot ones.) Cover the bottom of your paella pan with foil to protect it a little from the fire.

Put the pan on the grill, and heat the olive oil. This may take a minute or two. Add the chicken pieces to the grill surrounding the paella pan and let them cook. The boneless breast pieces and will need to be pulled off the grill long before the bone-in pieces, so have a clean plate standing by. As you remove the cooked breast pieces from the grill, add the chorizo and grill until browned. (This adds flavor to the sausage, and allows some of the grease to cook out so your paella tastes fresh and light, not greasy). Remove the chorizo and once cooled, cut into slices.

Once the oil is hot, add the onion and cook 5 minutes. Add the garlic and cook one minute. Add the tomatoes and cook, stirring constantly until the tomato mixture darkens and reduces to the consistency of jam. Now you have a sofrito. Woohoo!

Bring the broth mixture on your stove back to a slow boil. Add your rice to the sofrito in your paella pan and toast the rice for 2 minutes. Stir in the boiling broth mixture, peppers, squid, chicken, paprika, salt, a pinch of pepper, thyme, and chorizo. (Classic case of "do as I say, not as I do." Don't add the peas yet!).

Cover the grill and let cook for 35 minutes. After 35 minutes, check to make sure your paella is cooking. If some of the rice looks wetter than other parts of the pan, push it towards the center of the pan gently with a spoon. Once the rice is almost cooked, add the peas, push the clams down into the rice, and lay the shrimp on top. Cover the grill and cook another 10 minutes, or until the clams open up. Carefully remove the paella from the grill, remove the thyme sprigs, and serve with lemon wedges for people to squeeze over their paella before eating.

Summer Sides: Black Tea Tarragon Couscous Salad Recipe

2010-05-03T07:44:00.000-07:00

In honor of the trial I'll be lawyering it up for through May and June, I'd like to sing a little jingle from OSSS (Old School Sesame Street) with the lyrics updated for my grown up life. (Sing to the tune of "Cooperation")

Pro-crast-i-nation.

Makes it happen.

Pro-crast-i-nation.

Shirking together!

That's right. Every weekend I take a stack of papers home to read, review, mark-up and every weekend I cook, eat, drink, and make merry instead. This wouldn't be a big deal, except that I'm still a baby lawyer and I'm essentially making my Trial Attorney Debut (does that make me a debutante?) in front of the lawyers I will be working for, with, and against for the rest of my career. No pressure or anything.

Anyway, I cook tons of food and develop new recipes in order to perfect my procrastinating skills (a woman has to have goals!), so consider this recipe the fruits of my labors at avoiding real work. The black tea flavor is subtle, but it adds a dark, tannic undertone to an otherwise bright dish, and the tarragon adds a little sweet lingering aftershock to the crisp lemon and cucumber flavors. This salad would be good as a snack with some hummus and pita, or even as a side for a rich lamb dish.

Black Tea Tarragon Couscous Salad

2 cups pre-steamed dry couscous (if the instructions say to mix w/boiling liquid, it's pre-steamed)
2 1/2 cups hot, strong black tea-divided
Juice of 2 medium lemons
Zest of 1 medium lemon
2 cucumbers, seeded and thinly sliced
2 Tbs. olive oil
1 clove of garlic, minced
1 Tbs. smoked paprika
2 tsp. cumin
4 Tbs. chopped fresh tarragon
2 Tbs. chopped fresh flat-leaf parsley
Salt to taste

Stir together 1/2 cup of black tea with the lemon juice and zest, olive oil, paprika, cumin, tarragon, and parsley. Let it sit and let the flavors combine while you prepare the couscous.

Place the dried couscous in a larger bowl and stir in the minced garlic. Bring 2 cups of the black tea to a boil. Pour the tea over the couscous/garlic, stir to combine, cover with plastic wrap and let steam. After 15 minutes, fluff couscous with a fork. Stir in the cucumbers and the herb/tea/lemon mixture. Season with salt (it may need a good bit of seasoning, since the flavors are all very light and crisp) and serve cold or room temperature.

Hot Gratuitous Bacon Action

2010-04-30T07:30:00.000-07:00

Just when I thought I couldn't love Chef DeBarr of the Green Goddess any more (check out my review here) he brought this into my life.

The Green Goddess “Notorious” Bacon Sundae: Pecan praline ice cream with a creamy bacon caramel sauce carrying a bit of both Pink Himalayan & Black Lava Salts, & micro-planed Nueske’s Applewood Bacon.

Fievel likes it, too.

More to Love: Star & Shamrock Tavern and Deli

2010-04-28T09:11:00.000-07:00

"H Street." It's a phrase that gets spoken in our household approximately 3,400 times a week. If you didn't know better, you might assume that "H Street" is the name a fancy narcotic that we are addicted to (rather than a kicky, urban area in DC that keeps springing up unique bars, restaurants, and clubs faster than we can grow tired of the ones already there.)

Substitute "H Street" with the name of your favorite illicit drug in the following statements, and you'll see what I mean: "We went to this bar on H Street; No matter what we do on the weekends, we somehow always end up on H Street; We had the most transcendent experience at a restaurant on H Street; Why, we're on H Street right now!"

And don't stage an intervention just yet, ya'll, because our obsession with H Street is getting worse by the day. [See: HStreetGreatStreet.blogspot.com, re: the Biergarten Haus, NoMa Summer Screens Event, ect.] Yesterday before hitting up a free Bourbon tasting event (you guessed it, "on H Street") Mr. Luz and I stopped by H Street's new "New York Deli slash Irish Pub," Star and Shamrock, and the experience was just hedonistic enough to leave me very happy and perfectly full for the rest of the night. I ordered their Black Chocolate Stout (a bottled beer from Brooklyn Brewery) after consulting with our server and it was pretty awesome. A little sweet at first, then after a few sips the burnt chocolate malt flavor overtakes the sweetness, and for a stout, it's very light and drinkable. Then...our sandwiches came.

Mr. Luz ordered The Latke Madness, 3 potato crispy fried potato pancakes instead of bread (think "club sandwich" style), corned beef, griddled sauerkraut, swiss, and 1,000 island dressing with a pickle and Mr. Luz got the coleslaw side. This was basically a meat, cheese, crispy potato casserole disguised as a sandwich--there was no away around this thing without a fork--and it was as tasty as it sounds. The corned beef was perfect--warm, tender, not too salty but flavorful enough to hold its own. I'm also giving 2 thumbs up to the coleslaw for its fresh dill.

I ordered The Chicken and the Cow (which I felt especially delicious ordering: "I'll have the black chocolate stout, and the chicken, and the cow for dinner, please.") It was billed as hot pastrami, swiss, 1,000 island, and chopped chicken liver, and I got mine on pumpernickel with macaroni salad. By itself, the macaroni salad wasn't making my day, but after I ate my rich ass sandwich, I could appreciate the light, creamy, celery flavored-side dish a little more for its cool simplicity. As for the sandwich, it was pretty brilliant. It came with about a 3/4 inch slather of chopped chicken livers that had been mixed with a tiny bit of minced egg and some gherkin of some sort. And the chicken livers really made the sandwich. The pastrami was very good--thicker cut, sweeter, and sort of herbaceous--but imagine a tasty and satisfying sandwich covered in a good, earthy, meaty pâté, and that's the Chicken and the Cow.

All in all, Star and Shamrock was a cool place with fun beers and food, and we will definitely be back. I'm already planning a late night beer, booze, and dancing fest, followed by Star and Shamrock's reuben egg roll wraps and their pan friend matzo balls, "on H Street."

I'm Officially a New Orleanian, thanks to Chrissy Gemmill and Etsy

2010-04-02T10:02:00.000-07:00

Hello and Happy Spring! I hate to say that the blogging will be a little light through the month of April--Mr. Luz and I have 3 weddings (one in D.C., one in New Orleans, one in St. Louis) in the next 5 weeks--but who wants to cook right now, anyway? I'm living off a diet of takeout, beer, and sunshine until I get my fill of all 3 and only then will I go back to my tiny kitchen. In the meantime, guess what? More non-food related posts! Just be happy that I'm not detailing the ever-downward spiral of my Lady Gaga obsession. (Anyone in the market for a custom-made Gaga lavender blonde/yellow/platinum wig? Visit my Ebay shop. I wish I was kidding.)

Unlike alot of my posts, this is about someone else's passion. I found Chrissy Gemmill while Christmas shopping on Etsy.com (a crazy awesome site where talented people sell their handmade artistry to lucky people like you and me) last year. Her inspired and edgy-yet-elegant metal-work creates jewelry that, for lack of a better descriptor, gets taken seriously. WTF does that mean, right? I mean that her jewelry gets noticed, not because it's frivolous or flashy but because it's unique, boldly expressive, and beautiful. In sum, I'm a big fan.

And maybe you heard that the Saints won the Superbowl. For me, that moment cemented the rebirth of New Orleans in a mixture of tears, confetti, and hardships packed down by thousands of dancing, jumping, joyous feet, and so I started looking for a keepsake that would represent all that crying, stomping, and celebrating every time I looked at it. I started looking for my fleur de lys. If you've spent much time in New Orleans, you know that it's the only place where it's cool--actually, where it's required of you--to proudly sport any and all logos, symbols, colors, whatever, associated with the city. It doesn't even matter if you get your New Orleans t-shirts at a tourist shop.

So it's about time that I got my "signature" fleur de lys. I didn't want one that would be mass produced and, while beautiful, generic. I didn't want one that would be perfect, and polite because New Orleans is neither of those things. And so I asked Chrissy Gemmill to do her unique, expressive, inspired magic for me. And though it's probably impossible to be happy doing custom jewelry pieces when you are an artist with your own vision, Chrissy agreed and was great to work with. (Thankyouthankyouthankyouthank you, Chrissy!!)

Coincidentally, I was boarding a plane to NOLA when she emailed me these photos of my necklace, and it wasn't 100% the airport bloody marys that made me a little teary when I saw them. Chrissy hand cut/hammered the pendant pieces, and incorporated the team's colors in the black patina on the fleur de lys and in the vintage brass chain. Then she threw in her signature chainmail element to amp up the gothic New Orleans theme while keeping it elegant.

Thanks to Chrissy, I finally have my own fleur de ly and it's 100% me while also being 100% New Orleans. And when I'm not wearing it, my big blue plastic shark from Lucy's Retired Surfer's Bar on Tchop. Street in NOLA proudly sports it on my dresser. I have to say, it looks pretty cool on both of us.

Chrissy Gemmill teaches jewelry-making classes in Frederick, MD (not too far outside of D.C. and worth the trip) and you can purchase some of her pieces at The Muse in Downtown Frederick. You can also buy her pieces at her Etsy store, available here, and check out her latest projects on her blog, Chrissy Gemmill Jewels.

NOTE: Anyone who would like to bestow a gift on me at any time--and feel free to do so--I'd gladly accept a Chrissy Gemmill Skeleton Key Bracelet. Please and thank you.

Finally, Ethiopic Restaurant Comes to H Street!

2010-03-23T20:18:00.000-07:00

It's been a long week already, so to cope, Mr. Luz and I spent the night tucked into a huge pile of some amazing comfort food at Ethiopic Restaurant.

Ethiopic just opened behind Union Station on H Street NE, and the space and staff are as welcoming as the food. Mr. Luz and I sat in a romantic alcove with a large window, so we had a little privacy while also sharing the softly lit dining room and piano music with the rest of the guests. (Ethiopic is lined top to bottom with windows, and I can't wait to go there for a sunny Friday lunch.) Sam, the owner, accepted our ecstatic compliments on the food and the decor but said in the same breath "please tell us if anything changes, we are always looking for feedback." Everything was so wonderful, I think we'll just have to go back at least once a week to stay on top of that for Sam.

If you've never had Ethiopian food, you'll love Ethiopic. It serves richly flavored, spiced and stewed meat dishes with lamb, beef, and chicken and dark, delightful vegetarian dishes like curried potatoes with garlic, herbs and jalapeno, and split red lentils stewed with red pepper sauce. And yes, you eat with your hands. Like people used to do for thousands of years, until someone somewhere around 1800 B. C. (Before CrateandBarrel) decided to make a quick buck by telling folks that they should eat with metal shards. In a comparably civilized manner, at Ethiopic you pick up each bite in spongy injera (a soft, sometimes sour flat bread). And after you've scooped up the last bit of each dish off of your communal plate, you can fight over the large curried-potato-lentil-lamb covered injera that sat under it all. Mr. Luz always manages to distract me when this time comes, and he always gets the lentil-sauce-drenched section of injera. It happened again tonight, but make no mistake, I'm already plotting for next time. (And wondering if employing a wardrobe malfunction would be "so 2004")

On the flip side, if you're experienced with Ethiopian food, you'll also love Ethiopic. We ordered the Lamb Tibs, and the Vegetarian Platter for one (with 4 vegetarian dishes and the spicy lemon tomato salad) with crispy fish. Everything was cooked to maximize the flavor of the ingredients, meaning it was simmered so the flavors just melded without reducing everything to berbere-flavored mush. And speaking of the berbere (a fragrant and earthy blend of chilies, ginger, cloves, coriander, paprika, and other spices), everything was so fresh that each bite held one hundred flavors at once. Even their collard greens-a dish done so often that now when it's bad it's still okay-tasted sweet and fresh rather than bitter or bland.

Invariably, Ethiopic will go through growing pains as all new and ultimately successful restaurants do. But if Ethiopic's food continues to exhibit the same loving care and fresh ingredients that we experienced tonight, I predict that Mr. Luz and I will happily spend a good portion of our summer waiting in a line around the block for a table at our new favorite Ethiopian restaurant.

Guinness Braised Corned Beef & Cabbage with Garlic Mustard Glaze and Parsnips

2010-03-16T20:02:00.000-07:00

Now this here meal is for the meat eatin', beer swigging best of you. I'm serious.

Even though my favorite vegetarian says she used to love corned beef back when she was a carnivore, I don't entirely trust her opinion-she's from the Midwest like me, and we'll eat anything. Let's face it, no matter what the vegetarian says-corned beef, in all it's brined, hot-pink glory, is not something that everyone's going to be excited about.

In an attempt to make Mr. Luz love corned beef as much as I do (see: my Midwestern heritage) I douse mine in Guinness for a long braise in the oven. After it's fork-tender, I mash the braised garlic in with some mustard for flavor and apple butter (see, supra, Midwestern), slather that over the top, and broil it for a second for a deep, not-too sweet, garlicy caramel glaze. And though it still looks rather curious, Mr. Luz has happily eaten it for 3 days straight now (I like to indulge myself over St. Pat's day and make two briskets) and all I heard at dinner were happy noises.

As for the side dishes, I like to make a mash with the root vegetables that go into the braising liquid. That way you can mix them with some non-braised veggies to even out the saltiness of the veggies cooked in the briny corned beef braising liquid, and you're not eating squishy potatoes. I also simmer the cabbage separately so it's lighter in flavor and acts as more of a foil to all the earthy, salty goodness in your braising pot.
Note: March being the month after the Birthmonth and all, I have never succeeded in brining my own corned beef. Next year?

Guinness Braised Corned Beef & Cabbage with Garlic Mustard Glaze and Parsnips
(serves 4-6)

Ingredients:
1 3-4 lb. Corned Beef Brisket
1 head of garlic (trust me)
3 medium carrots, coarse chopped
1 small onion, coarse chopped
3 potatoes, halved
4 large parsnips, peeled and coarse chopped
2 stalks celery, if you have any-coarse chopped
1 bay leaf
3 bottles of Guinness or another Stout beer
2 tsp. Worcestershire sauce
Balsamic vinegar
1 Tbs. fresh Thyme, chopped
2 Tbs. butter
5 cups of coarse chopped green cabbage
3 Tbs. apple butter
2 Tbs. Dijon mustard
salt and pepper

Preheat the oven to 300 degrees. Add the carrots, onion, celery, potatoes, and bay leaf to your roasting pan. Remove the skins from each clove of garlic, and add all but two large cloves to the roasting pan. (Give the large cloves going into the roasting pan a good whack with the flat side of a knife to flatten/crush them a little).

Thoroughly rinse the corned beef and reserve the spice packet for the cabbage. Put the corned beef on top of the veggies in the roasting pan, and pour the two bottles of Guinness over the corned beef. Cover the roasting pan, and braise for 2.5 hours in the oven. After 2.5 hours, if the brisket isn't fork tender, recover and increase heat to 350 degrees for an additional 30-45 minutes.

When the brisket has 30 minutes left, put the parsnips in boiling water and cook until soft. Remove from heat, drain, and return to the pan to mash with a potato masher or a fork.

Add the cabbage to a pot with the remaining Guinness, and the reserved 2 cloves of garlic, chopped. Add water to almost cover the cabbage with the cooking liquid. Simmer, partially covered for 15-20 minutes-until the stalks of the cabbage are soft but the leaves still hold their shape. At this point you can remove the cabbage and reduce the braising liquid by boiling it, or you can leave your cabbage more "soupy." Add the Worcestershire sauce, and taste. If still doesn't have enough "zip" add 1 tsp. of the Balsamic vinegar at a time.

Take the corned beef brisket out of the oven. (Important: always let braised dishes cool in liquid or they'll dry out). Remove the potatoes and carrots from the braising liquid, mash, and add to the mashed parsnips. Add thyme and butter, and cook over very low heat until the butter is melted and the thyme is fragrant. Season with salt and pepper.

Remove the garlic from the braising liquid, mash, and mix with the mustard and apple butter. Place the brisket on a broiler pan, spread the garlic mixture over the top, and broil-checking often-until browned.
Slice the brisket and serve with the reserved braising liquid, the parsnip mash, and cabbage.

Puppies!! Snorglesnorglesnorgleaaaaaackk!

2010-03-15T11:44:00.000-07:00

If you read the post below, thanks for sitting beside my imaginary therapy couch for a few minutes. To show my appreciation, I give you puppy kisses:

Have a Little Faith, or "Let's talk about Me for a minute."

2010-03-15T08:48:00.000-07:00

With the help of a few too many endorphins (see: Saints, Superbowl Champions) and alot of time spent with good friends and my wonderful partner, I finally had a much-needed "breakthrough" this month and it's feeling pretty damn good.

After one specific heart-to-heart with an especially sympathetic and wise soul (me in my Lady Gaga inspired eye make-up and medieval night costume, she with her lovely smile. Yeah, it was a little awkward, but I needed it) I realized that I've been struggling with a whole hell of alot of self-doubt for over a year, and I didn't even know it. Not to get too far into the essentially boring depths of my personal life, but to say that I have a different outlook on life than the people I have been closest to since I started law school is a fairly healthy understatement (right up there with "Something's a little off with that Eric Massa guy"). When things are going wrong, I discuss, dissect, and seek real closure. It's just what I do, and in general I'm proud of the fact that people know that I'll stand up for them should the need arise. The rest of the group? It's avoid "conflict" AT ALL COSTS. I've been ostracized more than once merely for standing up for myself or for people I care about, because, like I said, AT ALL COSTS and I guess I'm expendable. After awhile, all of that conflict avoidance starts stacking up between you and your friends, and all of the sudden, the people you were closest to are miles away. And you start to feel like something's seriously wrong with you.

Scene II: SELF-DOUBT enters stealthily, stage right. Without making its presence explicitly known, it simply settles into the scene like a sinister arm chair, always bringing with it a sense that "something's not quite right."

Let's be honest...I really like myself. I think that most bloggers have pretty high self-confidence--we talk about ourselves all the times, and people without a pretty strong sense of self-worth aren't really up for that. But here I am, wrestling with this "Am I really a monster?" crap. ("Ouch, who put this sinister arm chair here?") It took someone forcefully telling me that I'm pretty normal and non-monstrous, Gaga eye-make up and all, for me to start appreciating "me" again-confrontational, assertive-however you want to put it-me. And that helped alot. I guess the goal now is to get to the point where I don't have to ask other people "am I still a good person?" every time I get a conflicting message. I have to believe in myself, and trust my decision-making even if the people closest to me would make different decisions. And if I have to check myself every now and then, which I do, I need to rely on the people who accept me for who I am and listen to what they have to say (when it's "Monster, absolutely" but more importantly, when it's "Monster? Are you crazy?") over the people who don't.

Because seriously, this self-doubt crap? It stops now.

Giant Homemade Girlscout Cookies III: Somoa Yoah

2010-03-08T17:15:00.000-08:00

Hey ya'll, my birthmonth may be over (why have a birthday when you can celebrate the whole month?) but that doesn't mean the party has to stop.

This year my birthmonth was outright amazing, thanks to my friends and family. First, Mama and Papa BaCon flew into D.C. just a few miles ahead of a giant snowstorm to throw a Superbowl party (Who Dat!) and traipse about a creepy, snow-silent city after too much wine. (Mama and Papa BaCon are hardcore. At Wisdom-a great bar-Mama ordered a drink called the Nacho Libre. From the menu: "Habanero infused tequila and pomegranate. Only an a**hole would drink this.")

From there we lived it up with good friends in New Orleans (with a detour in Shreveport for Me'me Williams' fantastically fun wedding). My birthday presents from Mr. Luz? Silver high-heel ankle boots with rhinestones, hot pink "snakeskin" and black velvet pumps, and a top hat. How can I not love this man?

Finally, Mr. Luz rounded up a wizard, a fair maiden, a witch and her newt, three medieval pirates, and a few unfortunate souls (unfortunate because they weren't in costumes while the rest of us got to be incognito idiots) for a quest to the Medieval Times Dinner Theater. I'm not sure that there's much to say besides "16 grown folks in paper crowns, drunken and shouting."

After celebrating for a month, I'm going cold turkey on sugar, alcohol, meat, and eye makeup. Just kidding!

Which brings me to the point of this post. Cookies! Giant cookies! Giant Girl Scout Cookies! Seriously, you should make this. It's easy, and cheap, and sort of scary but awesome.

The caramel is sort of "pull out your fillings" chewy, but worth it. Stick to the cheaper Brachs caramels or something similar. They stay soft where the fancier caramels (ie: Werther's Chewy Caramels) get rock hard after they've had the chance to set more.

Giant Samoa Girl Scout Cookie Recipe:

Sugar Cookie
1/2 cup sugar
3/4 cup butter, softened
1 large egg
1 tsp. vanilla extract
2 cups all purpose flour
1/4 tsp. salt

Caramel/Chocolate
4 cps shredded coconut
16 oz. cheap chewy caramels
1/2 cup milk
2 Tbs. butter (if unsalted, add 1/2 tsp. salt to melted caramel mixture)
10 oz. chocolate chips

Make the Samoa:
Preheat the oven to 300 degrees. Spread coconut in a deep baking dish and toast. Stir every 5 minutes for 10 minutes, and more often for the last 10 minutes. Coconut should be toasty brown and crispy but still soft.

Turn oven up to 350 degrees, and grease a 11 inch round tart pan with fluted edges. (You could probably also do 2 pie pans, and bake for a shorter period of time. You'll just have a less-giant cookie). Cream together the sugar and butter. Beat in eggs and vanilla. On low, slowly beat in flour and salt until large crumbs form. Press dough into your prepared pan and cut a circle out of the center with a water glass. Bake for 15 to 20 minutes, until base is set but not tough. Cool.

Melt 1/2 of the chocolate in the microwave or over a double boiler (one larger saucepan with an inch of water heated to boiling, with chocolate in a smaller sauce pan placed over the boiling water but not touching the boiling water.) Using a paint brush or basting brush, carefully paint a thin layer of chocolate on the bottom and sides of the cookie. Place in the fridge until set.

Melt the caramels in the microwave or a double boiler with the milk and salt, stirring frequently. Stir in the coconut. When the chocolate on the cookie has set, carefully flip it over. Spread the caramel coconut mixture onto the cookie base. Melt the remaining chocolate. Once it has cooled a bit, put the melted chocolate a plastic baggie, cut a small corner off of the baggie, and drizzle chocolate across the Samoa. Bravo, you've done it!

NOTE: Don't put this cookie in the fridge once you've put the caramel on it. Trust me.

Saints are World Champs!! And New Orleans Style BBQ Shrimp Recipe

2010-02-26T14:36:00.000-08:00

Hey, guess what? THE NEW ORLEANS SAINTS ARE WORLD CHAMPIONS!!!!!!

Mama and Papa BaCon flew from St. Louis to get snowed in and watch Superbowl XLIV with us, Foxy, and some crazy, lovely D.C. folks. Black and Gold beads, the dark smell of gumbo, and friends in Saints gear filled our house while "Superbowl Mambo" streamed from the Times Picayune website, and it felt like a true N'awlins romp. To everyone who came out for the party and to those who couldn't come due to the storm/work but who were there in spirit (JKarlin, we missed you!): because of you guys, Mr. Luz and I didn't miss home when we could have missed it the most. So thanks for being there with us.

As far as the game goes, I couldn't tell you what actually happened because I was too amped up to think. All I know is the K. Gates song "Stand Up and Get Crunk/Black and Gold to the Superbowl" kept blaring on our speakers, Mr. Luz kept doing his own secondline dance through the crowd in the living room and dining room to the kitchen and back again, and I got and gave alot of "touchdown hugs."

But there was a moment towards the end of the game when I checked the clock and saw that there were only 44 seconds left in the 4th quarter, and then it hit me full force--"Holy S*** this changes everything-how fantastic for NOLA!" and then "Is this really happening??" When I came to my senses after a few minutes, there weren't 25 different people, with different hometowns and even hometown teams, at our house . . . I only saw Saints fans, overcome with collective joy-shouting, hugging, crying, and all out getting crunk (look it up).

What a surprisingly blissful and unpredictably beautiful life we live.

On to the recipe! This is Mama Bacon's recipe from Southern Living for New Orleans BBQ Shrimp, and it's one of my favorite foods, though surprisingly easy. You can serve it as an appetizer by itself, or as an entree over cheese grits. The shrimp is marinated (in Nawlin's they do shells and head on, but peeled is okay too)and then baked in a spicy, tangy lemon butter sauce with a little Worcestershire sauce for depth and garlic. We double the marinade recipe so we have plenty left over for French bread-dipping. Only make this for the people you really love, because they'll likely request it at every pot luck you attend from now till the end of time. Though if they are anything like my friends, they are worth it.

New Orleans Style BBQ Shrimp Recipe

(photo and recipe courtesy of Southern Living)

4 lbs. large unpeeled shrimp (6 lbs. w/heads on)
1 cup Butter
1 cup Olive oil
1/2 cup Chili Sauce
1/2 cup Worcestershire Sauce
2 Lemons, sliced
8 Garlic Cloves, chopped
4 Tbs. Creole Seasoning (I use Tony's Light)
4 Tbs. Lemon Juice
2 Tbs. chopped Parsley
2 tsp. Paprika
2 tsp. Oregano
2 tsp. ground Red Pepper
1 tsp. hot sauce
2 loaves French bread

Spread shrimp in a large baking dish. Combine butter and next 12 ingredients in a saucepan over low heat, stirring until butter melts, and pour over shrimp. Cover and chill 2 hours, turning shrimp every 30 minutes.

Bake, uncovered, at 400° for 20 minutes; turn once. Serve with bread and/or grits.

Exotic, Interesting Food? Blah. Or, What I Do When I'm Not Cooking

2010-02-24T15:58:00.000-08:00

It's that time of year again--the dead, cold, dreary D.C. winter. The time of year where I can't even think about the yummy flavor combinations that complement cilantro, and tomatoes are only for soup and marinara sauce. All I want is an I.V. of hot chocolate--it can even be the cheapo Swissmiss kind just GIVEITTOMENOWBEFOREITOTALLYFREAKOUTMAN! And don't even think about trying to feed me a cold vegetable. What's that you say? It's organic swiss chard wrapped with the most exquisite white truffle and served with tears of joy? Is it cold? Then f*** off.

Needless to say, we've been eating alot of heavy, uninspired dishes in our house lately, and my mood and my waistline are paying the price. Luckily it'll be Spring again oh so soon, and then I'll be back in action. Until then, I thought I'd give you a lil taste of what I, Princess BaCon, get up to when I'm not slaving away in my kitchen.

I channel the rockstar, her Majesty the Queen of Deliciousness and Ass-Kicking, Lady Gaga.

As you can tell, this is a consuming and makeup-laden affair. Apparently 5 wigs isn't enough, as I've exhausted each of them before March.

In sum, when I'm not cooking I spend 45 minutes putting on eye makeup, fake hair, and crazy shoes and then I get drunk in public.

I also get crafty. Mr. Luz pulled a miracle, finding our dream rowhouse at rent we could afford. But the kitchen was, oddly enough, my least favorite room in the house. (Perhaps that's why I drink so much when I cook?) In the before picture, we'd already pulled off all the wonderfully greasy cabinet doors, but you get the picture. And I have no idea how the linoleum got that nasty, but it felt like walking on 30 years of caked on mud. So, we woke up one morning, and over coffee decided to overhaul it. That day.

Our plan went something like this-Me: "Let's do something sort of retro, since we have all these retro appliances anyway." Mr. Luz: "Ok." Off we go to the Home Depot for robin's egg blue and vanilla paint, chrome-looking hardware, and some shiny black and white floor tiles. TaDa!

So when I'm not cooking, Mr. Luz and I scrub, sand, nail, paint stuff funny colors and lay floor tiles and then I brag about our "home renovations" as if I just re-installed our entire gas line blindfolded, with one arm tied behind my back, uphill both ways.

Mardi Gras King Cake - You Know Dat!

2010-02-15T21:00:00.000-08:00

{Mr. Luz's second guest post tackles yet another baking task - it's a little late for King Cake season, which ends tomorrow night at midnight, so bookmark this one for next year -it's a keeper)

Squeaking in just before Mardi Gras/Fat Tuesday comes this recipe for King Cake, adapted from Emeril Lagasse's recipe that can be found all over the internet (why Emeril Lagasse has become synonymous with New Orleans cuisine is somewhat of a mystery, considering he is originally from Fall River, MA. Of course, he used to be Executive Chef at Commander's Palace in Nola, Home of the 25 Cent Martini Friday Lunch, so he can't be all that bad. Ask Mr. Luz about his Gentlemen's Quarterlies during law school, and he'll regale you with purple drank boozy haziness. Seriously, they only charge .25 cents for martinis EVERY FRIDAY* - *with purchase of entrée). Mr. Luz has tweaked the recipe subtly, primarily because the oven chez nous is a landlord special, it's been snowing a lot here lately and grocery stores have been low on basic necessities, and frankly, recipes are like maps: half the time, if you don't already know where you are going, you won't likely get there if you follow the map religiously (Google Maps, I'm talking to you!). Actually, you probably shouldn't follow anything religiously, but that's a topic for another blog....

King Cake is basically brioche bread formed into a circle with a sweet cream cheese filling - which means that it ranges from sublimely light and flaky to downright concretinous: spackled with too much lemon icing and pavéed with 1/4 inch thick bark-rinds of sickeningly sweet sugar sprinkles. In New Orleans, sadly, the vast majority of King Cake you are likely to encounter is supermarket-spawned, mass-produced shoe leather masquerading as King Cake. Sure, Mardi Gras is all about masquerading, but the fraud perpetrated on the citizens of the Crescent City is frankly of Crying Game proportions, y'all. We eat it because of the tradition, not because it tastes good.   A home-made King Cake, even in New Orleans, is a rarity, and you are sure to impress by making your own (unless you buy your King Cake from La Boulangerie on Magazine Street - they have both the traditional almond custard and puff pastry Galette Des Rois, as well as the Mediterranean brioche Nola-style King Cakes, and are light-years tastier than the supermarket fare).

What You'll Need:

Equipment
*Stand Mixer with Bread Hook Attachment (seriously, you can make bread dough the easy way or the
    hard way, and without this basic equipment you'll get too frustrated if you've never made brioche
    before)
* Large Glass Bowl for Dough Rising (you ought to have a set of these anyway, they are awesome)
* Damp Kitchen Cloth or Saran Wrap to Cover Your Dough While It Rises
* Standard-Size Sheet Pan (the biggest one that will fit in your oven)
* Parchment Paper With Which to Line your Sheet Pan
* Set of Measuring Cups
* Set of Measuring Spoons
* Two Sauce Pans (one to heat milk and one to melt butter, unless you have a microwave to melt
    butter)
* Small Bowl to store Egg Yolks
* Medium-Size Bowl to store flour
* Cup to combine rest of dry ingredients

Ingredients:

* 2 packets active dry yeast

* 1/2 cup granulated sugar

* 1 1/2 sticks (6 ounces) unsalted butter, melted

* 1 cup warm milk (about 110°F)

* 5 large egg yolks, at room temperature (use organic eggs if you can - the yolks are healthier and heartier - regular eggs are anemic and thin, and don't fluff as nicely)

* 4 1/2 cups bleached all-purpose flour (I used unbleached and it turned out fine)

* 2 teaspoons salt (I used sea salt, and again, it turned out nicely)

* 1 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg (I used dried, powdered nutmeg, but Mr. Luz is not a huge fan of medieval spices, use sparingly)

* 1 teaspoon grated lemon zest

* 1 teaspoon vegetable oil

* 1 pound cream cheese, at room temperature (there is no other cream cheese but Philly Phull Phat
Cream Cheese - don't you dare use light!)

* 4 cups confectioner's sugar (prolly too much by at least a 1/2 cup - I had a lot of extra icing)

* 1 plastic king cake baby (or Pagan Symbol of your choosing)

* 1 cup crushed pecans or walnuts (skip the nuts if you are worried about allergies, but I like nuts)

* 5 tablespoons milk, at room temperature

* 3 tablespoons fresh lemon juice

* Purple-, green-, and gold-tinted sugar sprinkles (New Orleans Mardi Gras Colors, but you can go
crazy and make any color theme you like - I made a Black and Gold Saints Cake for our Super Bowl
Party)

The Construction: If you are like me, you like to Get Organized before you bake. Most recipes just jump you right in to the middle of the recipe, but Mr. Luz likes to lay every out everything in advance, assembly-line fashion. Believe it or not, the timing of adding your ingredients to the mixer MATTERS, so you don't want to be fumbling about finding your ingredients as you struggle to keep up.

- Take your eggs out first and separate the yolks, placing the yolks in a bowl so they can come to room temperature (unless you are a freak of nature who can separate yolks from whites while dangling the shells over your stand mixer.).

- Measure out your 4 1/2 cups of flour and put it in its own bowl.

- Combine your salt and nutmeg in a small cup.

- Melt your butter and warm up your milk (DO NOT try to warm up your milk by adding it to your melted butter. This will result in disastrously dense dough - I know, because I tried. I alluded to the problem of overcombining ingredients in my Apple Pie post - the key to any good dough is to NOT overmix - you want to try to combine the ingredients without synthesizing them into an overly homogenous whole).

- Get your stand mixer all set up. You'll want to be able to lift the mixer arm up out of the bowl at the end, so if you aren't familiar with that switch on the side, learn how to use it before you begin.

- Pour your vegetable oil into your glass bowl and roll it around the sides to coat. Take your cream cheese out of the refrigerator to let it soften.

Let The Dough-Making Begin!

- Add your two yeast packets and granulated sugar to the stand mixer bowl, and then add the melted butter and your warm milk.

- Beat at low speed for about a minute. Without stopping the mixer, add the egg yolks (I dumped them in all at once), and then beat for 1 minute at medium-low speed.

- Again, without stopping the mixer, add the flour. Don't dump all the flour in at once - hold your bowl of flour at an angle and use a spoon to slowly push the flour into the bowl. Next add the salt and nutmeg, but DO NOT simply dump it in all at once - sprinkle it evenly through the bowl - otherwise, you will end up with clumps of salty nutmeg throughout your dough)

- Beat until everything seems to have mixed together evenly. Then, increase the mixer speed to medium high until the dough pulls away from the sides of the bowl, forms a ball, and begins climbing up the dough hook (this is one of the coolest things about dough hooks. It's as if the dough comes alive and starts CLIMBING out of the BOWL!! If the dough does not separate from the sides of the bowl, DO NOT ADD liquid like every recipe out there says. This will only make the dough sticky and gooey and impossible to spread out later. Add small amounts of flour, a tablespoon at a time, along the edges of the bowl until the climbing alchemy begins. Believe me, I tried adding warm water like the recipe says, and it was a complete mess every time. If the dough doesn't separate from the bowl, I guarantee you it's because it's too wet, not too dry).

BRIOCHE RISING:

Dust your fingertips with some flour, and then tilt the mixer head up. Use your fingers to pull the dough from the dough hook, letting it fall back into the mixer bowl. Tilt the dough ball out of the mixer bowl into your hand and then gently form it into a ball shape. It doesn't have to be perfectly smooth or round - the rising will take care of that. Put the dough ball into the glass bowl, and flip it over a few times to coat it with oil - this will prevent the dough from sticking to the bowl). Cover dough with plastic wrap or a wet kitchen towel and let it rise in a warm, draft-free place for two hours, or until doubled in size (an obvious place to do this is in your oven set to Warm - but be careful, Warm on landlord-issue ovens can be too hot, and some newer electronic ovens don't even have a Warm setting. If in doubt, set to warm for 20 minutes, then turn the oven off for the remainder)

Filling: While the dough is rising, wash out your stand mixer bowl and attach the regular mixer attachment. Combine the cream cheese, the nuts, the lemon zest, and 1 cup of the confectioner's sugar until everything is good and mixed together (you can also use brown sugar as pictured below). Do not put it back in the fridge - it needs to be pliable for spreading on your dough.

Next, line your sheet pan with parchment paper.

Also cover your work space with parchment paper, and then lightly powder your the parchment with a few pinches of confectioner's sugar (I prefer this to flour - it's sweeter, and dissolves into the dough more readily). Powder your fingertips as well.

When the dough has finished rising, remove the dough from the bowl and place it in the center of the parchment on your work surface. Using your fingers, pat it out into a rectangle about 30 inches long and 6 inches wide. Try to keep an even thickness throughout.

Next, spread the filling lengthwise over the bottom third of the dough, making sure to spread the filling all the way to BOTH ends of the rectangle (you don't want to end up with one section of the ring lacking filling).

PLACE YOUR BABY (or Pagan Symbol of Your Choosing) randomly in the bottom third of the dough NOW (I always, always forget to put the baby in there. It's like a crippling amnesia or something).

Pull the dough from the bottom edge and begin rolling it up over the filling. Seal the edges, pinching the dough together to seal up the tube.

Now, work one end of the roll open wide so that you can insert the opposite end into it like a sleeve (imagine stuffing one sleeve of your warmest sweatshirt into the opposite sleeve) Next, pull the dough into a cylinder and attach the ends.

Now for the Fabu Flip. Your seams are on the top, and you want them on the bottom, so place the sheet pan with the parchment paper over the top of your cylinder, centering it. Grasp the corners of the parchment paper that is on your counter surface, and simply flip the whole thing over like a sandwich - then remove the bottom layer of parchment paper. Presto Change-o!

Cover the ring with plastic wrap or a moist kitchen towel and place in a warm, draft-free place (again, your oven works nicely). Let the dough rise until doubled again in size, or about 45 minutes.

Preheat the oven to 350°F.

Brush the top of the risen cake with 2 tablespoons of the milk.

Bake until golden brown, 25 to 30 minutes. (You'll have to really watch this one if you have a landlord-issue oven, because at 25 minutes my cake wasn't nearly done. I made another few of these in my neighbor's convection oven, and not only did they cook faster, they rose even more as it baked).

Remove from the oven and let cool completely on a wire rack.

Icing: Combine the remaining 3 tablespoons of milk, the lemon juice, and the remaining 3 cups of confectioner's sugar in a bowl. Stir to blend well. With a rubber spatula, spread the icing evenly over the top of the cake. Sprinkle with your colored sugar crystals, alternating colors around the cake.

You can get crazy and make all kinds of other designs, like this one to the left, or the Super Bowl design below:

Finally, a word on the "Who Gets The Baby" controversy. In New Orleans, if you get the baby in your piece of King Cake, you are supposed to bring the next King Cake to the next social gathering. Mardi Gras season lasts from Epiphany (early January) until, well, Mardi Gras, so there is typically plenty of time for you to man up and bring one in. Some skin-flint types wait until everyone has had their piece of cake to see if someone else will get the baby. Not only does this go against the spirit of the thing, there is a moral to the story:

Baby-Jesus-Eating-Avoiders were designated "The Goat", and in ancient times if you played wait-and-see, you were ostracized from the community for an entire year. Of course, those who were hesitant had good reason to prevaricate over their slice of the tasty pie. It used to be that if you got the Pagan Symbol in your slice, you were made King for a Year, and could have sex with all of the village's virgins or some such awesomeness, after which you were promptly and summarily executed, and your blood poured over next year's crops to ensure a good harvest. Nowadays, kids in France get to wear silly gold paper crowns that look like they came from Burger King instead of free sex for a year, and here in America you merely shoulder a vague obligation to bring the next cake. Traditions used to have real consequences, I guess is the moral of the story. And of course Mr. Luz is just making all of this up* because he is just annoyed that he almost ALWAYS gets the Baby, yet has never been offered a single virgin...

*Actually, not really making it all up...Read here for more on the pagan roots of the King Cake tradition.

Happy Mardi Gras and We'll See You In New Orleans!!!

And then, there was great joy.

2010-01-25T09:54:00.000-08:00

I can't stop watching this, and I can't stop crying. The people of New Orleans are rare. They have the fortitude to make it through the hard, heartbreaking times and the spirit to anticipate the joyful times that make it all worthwhile. It's not about Katrina, it's about unabashed hope in spite of endless disappointment. It's always been that way in NOLA, and here is their great reward. Congratulations, New Orleans--the Black and Gold are going to the Superbowl!

How could this happen?

2010-01-14T16:38:00.000-08:00

I must admit that, although it is near and dear to the hearts of people I care about, I am not as knowledgeable as I should be about Haiti's cultural wealth and political struggles. But I have lived among the destruction that comes after natural disasters, and right now my heart is breaking for the Haitian people.

Today, they deal with the loss of loved ones, their homes, their security, and likely their own health. Many who are not dead are injured, and the hospitals are overwhelmed--some broken bones and fractured jaws will never get treated, and more illnesses are likely to develop if fresh water can't get into the country soon. Next Month, a large portion of an entire country will begin to be bulldozed, as if it were never settled and civilized. As if no one ever built the market, the streets, hospital, the homes, or the court house and instead dropped millions of soul-sick, grieving people in the middle of nothing and said "Survive, start over, all you have is the dirt under your feet. That's all anyone has." And Next Year, where will the debris go? The ghost cars, crushed and abandoned? They will rise up in huge piles, leaking and polluting and overwhelming those who were able to make themselves something, anything, out of the dirt in search of comfort and security.

I've seen what 1/100th of the destruction faced by the Haitian people can do to a city and its people here in the Good Ole' US of A, and it is staggering. For almost a year after Katrina, I walked to school flanked by 15 foot-tall piles of debris and lived amidst fallen-down buildings, and I knew that almost everyone I encountered had been touched by death. I say that to preface this statement: based on personal experience, I don't think I'm being dramatic when I say that our generation will never see the end of the mark that this earthquake has left on Haiti. The very makeup of the world has changed entirely, and overnight.

I wish I could do more.

In the meantime, I have and will continue to donate money to the American Red Cross, as well as Hurah, a human rights group committed to returning democracy and justice to Haiti and comprised of Haitians living and working in some of the hardest hit areas of the country. Please consider doing the same. The American Red Cross is having a text campaign, where you can donate $10 by texting "Haiti" to 90999 and the donation will simply be charged to your cell phone bill. (The company responsible for managing the money collection will not take any of their overhead costs from the donations intended for Haiti, so your full $10 will go to the Red Cross relief efforts.) The Red Cross has collected a record $4 million through their text campaign to date, and I sincerely hope that the momentum continues.

I should also say that there is some controversy regarding musician Wycleff Jean's relief efforts, since he has been linked to oppressive entities in Haiti. This is not to say that his organization is not helping the Haitian people with the money collected, only that the organization itself, Yele, can't necessarily be counted on to promote justice and democracy if it will challenge its vested interest in politics and maintaining the status quo, so please consider giving to an organization other than Yele if you are so inclined.

Giant Homemade Girl Scout Cookies II: Do-Si-Do's, Woot!

2010-01-14T09:58:00.000-08:00

I'm sorry, but who doesn't need a giant, dense peanut-butter cookie cake in their baking repertoire? (Peanut-allergy sufferers aside) I know I sure as hell do.

Which is why I came up with one! The cookie is salty, and the perfect blend of chewy and crumbly (and not too sweet). The filling makes everything moist, and adds a sweetness that would be too cloying if it was present throughout the whole cookie, but is perfect in little bites as you eat each slice.

And so I present to you, darling hedonistic readers, my recipe for a Giant Homemade Do-Si-Do Girl Scout Cookie, with tips and tricks at the bottom.

For the cookie:
2 sticks of butter, softened
1 1/4 cups sugar
1 cup creamy peanut butter, room temperature
2 large eggs and 1 egg yolk
1 tsp. vanilla extract
3 tsp. salt
1 tsp. baking powder
2 cups all-purpose flour

For the filling:
1 1/2 cups creamy peanut butter, room temperature
1/2 cup butter, room temperature
1/2 cup powdered sugar

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Coat a 9 inch springform pan with nonstick cooking spray, line the bottom with parchment, and coat the parchment with nonstick cooking spray.

Mix the flour, salt, and baking powder together in a small bowl. Cream the butter and sugar together in a large bowl, with a mixer on medium-high, until combined and fluffy. Beat in the peanut butter, then the eggs and vanilla. On low, mix in flour mixture until combined. The batter will be slightly pasty and thick, but pourable.

Spread 1/3 of the batter into the pan, and bake for 20-30 minutes, until browned on the edges and barely set up in the middle. Remove from oven and cool for 15 minutes before removing from the pan to continue cooling on a rack. Prepare the pan once again with the cooking spray and parchment paper, and pour the remaining 2/3 of the batter into the pan. Bake at 350 for 25-35 minutes, until browned and barely set. Remove from the oven and use a small water glass to cut a circular hole in the top of the cookie, Girl Scout Cookie styles. Let cool.

To construct:

First, run a knife around the edge of the cookies to smooth and round them and remove any extra crispy bits.

Beat all of your filling ingredients until blended, and place in a piping bag with a large star tip.

Take the thinner cookie (the one you made with 1/3 of the batter) and put it on your display plate. Using the piping bag, run a thick bead of filling around the edge, and then "stack" another bead of filling on top of that. Use the piping bag to add a single layer of filling to the rest of the top of the cookie, reserving approximately 1 cup of the filling in the piping bag. Place the thicker cookie on the top of the filling on the thinner cookie, "sandwich" style. Pipe a decorative swirl into the whole you cut out of the top, and serve.

Tips and Tricks:

Don't over-bake the cookie. It will firm up as it cools and sets.
You could also probably use two cake pans to do this, and make both cookies at the same time, but then put parchment paper around the rim as well as on the bottom.
Try to get the top cookie in the oven as soon as you can...if you dawdle, the baking powder will eventually lose its potency.

Giant Thin Mint Girl Scout Cookie and BaCon's Blogoversary!

2010-01-11T00:36:00.000-08:00

I love the beginning of January. When else can you tell perfect strangers that you hope their next 365 days are happy ones? And I'm very excited about 2010, ya'll. I'm hoping that this year I: finally screw Chase Bank over by paying off all of my credit card debt and never looking back, successfully hike Glacier National Park's backcountry for 10 days without whining myself to death, and eat at Chef DeBarr's Green Goddess restaurant in NOLA at least 10 times.

The beginning of January marks a new year but it also marks the end of a year of BaCon. That's right...it's my Blogoversary! (Note: Though I hate "foodie" and "gastrosexual," I'm not above a little neologistic fun every now and then. Say it...blog-o-versary. Fun, right?)

I started BaCon one year ago this week, and it's been distracting me from my day job and my sex life ever since...wait. Forget I said that. Honestly, this past year I've learned that to love cooking is to love pleasure and companionship, and BaCon has brought me both by the buckets.

My Inaugural Post detailed "How To Make a Croquembouche," the item I brought to my work's annual holiday baking contest. So it's only fitting that my Blogoversary post be my 2009 entry for the baking contest (or entries, as it were). The baking contest is one part tasting competition, one part ThisIsWhyYoureFat.com spectacle, which is why I chose to make giant dinner-plate sized versions of my favorite Girl Scout Cookies.

I figured that you can't go wrong with making a 100x to scale version of everyone's favorite unique yet familiar treats. (And I am obsessed with teeny tiny versions of everyday things, or giant versions of things that are typically diminutive. If I ever see an airdale terrier wearing something like a teeny tiny doll's wide-brimmed feathered hat, my head might explode.)

And so without further ado, the first of 3 Giant Girl Scout Cookie recipe with tips and tricks at the bottom:

Giant Thin Mint Girl Scout Cookie Recipe

For cookie:
1 cup crunchy chocolate cookies, ground into rice-crispy sized pieces
2 1/4 cups flour
1/4 cup cornstarch
6 Tbs. unsweetened cocoa powder
1/2 tsp. salt
1 cup sugar
1/2 cup butter, softened
1 large egg
1/4 cup milk
1/2 tsp. vanilla extract
1 1/2 tsp. peppermint extract

For chocolate glaze:
10 oz. semisweet chocolate (I used fancy chocolate chips with good results)
1/2 cup butter, softened
1 Tbs. peppermint extract

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F. Whisk together the dry ingredients except for the cookie crumbs. In a separate large bowl, cream together butter and sugar with a mixer on medium-high speed. Beat in the liquid ingredients and the egg on low speed. Gradually add in the dry ingredients (flour mix and cookie crumbs) on medium/medium-low speed.

Prepare a large (10 inch) tart pan for scalloped edges or 10 inch round pie pan with non-stick cooking spray. Pour the batter into the pan, making sure to spread the batter evenly.

Bake for 17-20 minutes, until the edge of the cookie is firm and the center is moist and soft but not raw. Remove from oven, run a sharp knife around the edge of the cookie, and let cool completely before gently removing it from the pan (I put a plate on top of the pan, flipped it upside down until it released, and then carefully flipped it back over onto a cooling rack for glazing.)

For the chocolate glaze:
Melt the butter. Bring 2 inches of water in deep, small pan. Add the chocolate to another pan that you can place on top of the water-pan to create a double boiler. When the water boils, place the pan with the chocolate over and inside the water pan but don't let the boiling water touch the bottom of the chocolate pan. (Why? I don't know. It's just one of those things you hear that sounds important).

Once a bit of the chocolate has melted, stir until everything has melted. Remove from the heat and stir in the melted butter and peppermint extract. Working quickly, paint a thin layer of the chocolate glaze on the top and the sides of the cookie. Let sit at room temperature until it has hardened.

Tips and Tricks:

The cookie crumbles add that signature Thin Mint crunchy cookie texture to a cookie/cake-like recipe. I found some plain crunchy organic cookies at my local grocery store and they worked perfectly.
It sounds like alot of peppermint extract, which can sometimes taste medicinal when added to baked goods, but the richness of the chocolate really counteracts that, and blends well with the mint flavors in this recipe.
Err on the side of undercooking vs. overcooking. A more cakey cookie is much preferred to a chocolate glazed hockey puck. Trust me on this.
Resist the urge to freeze this to have the chocolate harden. It's too big to really freeze and bring back to room temp. before serving, and freezing will harden the cookie so that it's hard to cut. Be patient, it'll set.

The Best Apple Pie Recipe in the World! (And Mr.Luz blogs)

2010-01-08T04:20:00.000-08:00

Introducing my favorite friend, lover, and Lady Gaga impersonator and now BaCon Concentrate's first Guest Blogger, Mr. Luz!

How To Make The Best Apple Pie In The World (With A Lot of Help from The Man Who Ate Everything, Jeffrey Steingarten)

Long before he became the portly, overly smug judge you love to hate on Iron Chef America and The Next Iron Chef, Jeffrey Steingarten (JS) was (and still is) Vogue magazine’s food critic (which I imagine must be like writing a sex column for the Wall Street Journal, but I digress). And even longer before that, he was a lawyer (double-Harvard, no less - perhaps there is still hope for Miss E. Lee after all…) Somewhere along the way he wrote what I believe to be the funniest, wittiest, and most engrossing collection of food-related essays in existence, The Man Who Ate Everything. True to form, I bought our copy at a thrift store for a dollar (but I've given it as a gift countless times since it was published in 1997 - my brother is a chef, after all...) The last chapter is a veritable dissertation on the art of baking perfect pies. JS tested every single pie recipe ever written over the past 73 years, so believe me when I tell you that he is nothing if not obsessive about getting it right.

Why, you might ask, am I making my blogging debut writing about apple pie? A little pedestrian, no? Not very stunty, or haute cuisine, after all. Certainly not up to the very high standard set by Miss E. Lee in her stratospheric debut nary one year ago today... Well, this is a blog in part about comfort food, and apple pie is as comforting as it gets when it comes to desserts. I happen to believe that if you don't like apple pie, it's probably not your fault - most apple pie truly sucks. It has drifted so far from its roots that it has become unrecognizable - the slimy, overly-sweet, gelatinous, cinnamon-infested filling and soggy cardboard crust served up at your local diner with a glorp of generic vanilla ice cream on top is not what inspired itinerant hobos to risk arrest slinking into your great-grandmother's backyard on a summer afternoon to pilfer a piping handful... It is my hope here to re-introduce you to the myth that inspired the saying, As American as Mom and Apple Pie.

What You Will Need
- a 9-inch glass pie plate (seriously, is there any other type of pie plate?)
- a big mixing bowl (for crust-making)
- a second big mixing bowl (for storing your apple filling while you wrestle with the crust)
- a rolling pin (for crust rolling)
- a fork (for peforming the fork death spiral)
- measuring cup and measuring spoons (for measuring things)

For the crust (and don't even think about not making your own crust!):
- 3 cups unbleached all-purpose flour (JS prefers King Arthur)
- 2 tsp sugar
- 1 tsp salt
- 1 1/2 cups unsalted COLD BUTTER (JS provides us with a dissertation on the glory of pure lard and/or Crisco, but butter works just fine, and will kill you more slowly)
- 3/4 cup ICE COLD water (I prefer BlingH20, The Most Expensive Bottled Water In The World, but tap water will work just fine)

For the apple filling:
- 3 1/2 lbs of apples (which amounts to 7 or 8 large apples, JS prefers "early" Gravensteins, then Pippins, then Granny Smiths, although I have used Fujis and Galas - but your safest bet are Granny Smiths - the key is to not use soft, mealy apples - they need to hold up to baking, not to being eating raw)
-1/2 a lemon (this won't end up in the actual pie, but is necessary to prevent oxidation of the apples - we prefer our apples rust-free)
-1 1/4 cups sugar
- 3 tbsps flour
- 1 tsp pure vanilla extract
- 1/4 tsp salt

For the flair:
- 4 tbsps of additional butter to grease the pie plate (1 tbsp) and to add to the filling (3 tbsp)
- a dash of milk to brush on the crust (dash=1 tbsp)

- 1 tbsp regular old sugar (to sprinkle on the crust)

The Process
Start by making your apple pie filling - that way you will gain the necessary confidence to make your own crust, which is really the entire battle here. I mean, how hard is it to fill a large mixing bowl halfway with cold water, squeezing in the juice of half a lemon (making sure not to squeeze in the lemon seeds), and then peeling and coring your apples, slicing them into 16ths (cutting each cored apple in half, then cutting each half into 4 slices, then cutting each slice in half across the middle of the slice), and then submerging them in the cold water? See - you are already one third of the way there!

The Crust Massage
Ok, brace yourself. When I first read JS's crust-making technique, I felt as if I had just attended a Yoga for The Mind seminar...I mean, how many times was I supposed to gently roll the olive-sized butter pats lightly through my fingers as I contemplated the molecular substructures I was attempting to synthesize? How many foot-pounds of pressure was I not supposed to apply as I plunged my fingers in a perfectly vertical manner along the sides of the mixing bowl (and only the sides)? I'll admit that the first three times I made this recipe, I stressed over every single word on all thirty pages of the chapter, worrying that a single missed conjunction would ruin the end result. But it really is a very simple recipe: butter, flour, salt, sugar, and apples. The idea behind the crust is to not overmix, to not overcombine, to leave things relatively separate, and above all else, to not melt the butter so that it becomes liquid and incorporate itself into the flour. You want to achieve an uncomfortable (dare I say it) Butter-Flour Apartheid - with cool pieces of butter of all shapes and sizes living right on top of, and among, and around an oblivious strata of Flour. If you could interrogate the Flour, asking,"What is Butter?" The Flour wouldn't be able to tell you, for Flour is not allowed to speak to Butter, only to coat it, and support it in the Butter-Flour socio-political hierarchy. If you asked the same question of the Butter, the Butter would reply, "I know not what Flour is, except that it is everywhere around me, although I have never touched it." Butter and Flour, uncomfortably co-existing, but never knowing the other's essence.

Back to the recipe.

Preheat your oven to 450 degrees (you do have an oven, don't you? Forgot to mention that). Mix the flour, sugar and salt with your dry fingers in your large bowl. Cut your COLD butter into 1 tbsp chunks, and drop them, emphatically, onto the flour mixture. Allow them to become coated in flour, and then proceed to break each tbsp-sized chunk into randomly smaller pieces, each time coating the pieces in flour, without squeezing or pressing the pieces into the flour (remember, you're going for separate-but-equal, not melting-pot-friendly here).

We are now going to learn how to perform the Crust Massage. Once each large chunk of butter has been broken up into randomly smaller pieces and coated with flour, plunge your hands to the bottom of the bowl, and grab a small handful of flour/butter in each hand, palms facing up (unlike in the picture below, where my Irish Potato Farmer hands are obscuring the massage technique). With your thumb and forefingers, gently rolling the butter/flour through your fingers three times, allowing the butter/flour to fall back into the bowl (what you are doing here is breaking up the larger butter pieces into even smaller morsels while coating them with flour). Do not smear or mash, gently roll. Do this five or six more times, plunging your hands in, grabbing small handfuls and rolling the flour/butter three times through your fingers.

In the next phase, keep plunging your hands into the bottom of the bowl, but roll the small handfuls of flour/butter only ONCE through your fingers, allowing everything to drop back into the bowl. Do this approximately 25 times, or until your mixture looks like a shattered, floury asteroid field):

Yes, those are large pieces of Butter-Barely-in-Flour disguise. That's intentional. We don't want any homogenous assimilation round these parts. We want rough around the edges, disorderly chaos. This is America, after all, not some centrally-planned commune. Don't be alarmed if you have a large amount of raw-looking flour in the bottom of your bowl - that's what your water is for. (After having performed the Crust Massage numerous times over the past 12 years, the Nerd in me wants to make this a lot easier for you. But first I wanted to give you a little taste of the Steingarten Insanity - if you think my instructions are oppressive, buy his book. What I really think you ought to do is to cut each COLD tbsp-sized pat of butter according to the Fibonacci Sequence, then dump all the pieces into the flour, and then do the 25 gentle finger-rolling flour-coating Crust Massage repetitions. But I also realize that adding the Golden Ratio into the mix is a tad bit mystical for something so essential to our national ethos as apple pie. But it would make a perfect crust, I am sure....)

Next, gently sprinkle 1/2 cup of your ICE COLD water over the entirety of you Butter/Flour Asteroid Field. Wielding your Fork in a perfectly vertical orientation, slowly circle the fork in a perfect spiral (oh yes, my Friends of Fibonnaci, I went there) beginning along the outer edge of the bowl and ending in the exact center of your Butter/Flour Galaxy. Do this twice or three times, or until your Butter-Flour mixture starts to begin to form into a proto-Asteroid field (what the Asteroid Field looked like before it got blasted apart - you can still see the beginnings of each individual asteroid and all the asteroid dust, but it is now glommed into a large mass, and is still somewhat floury and dry-looking).

DO NOT OVERWATER - water is a solvent, and we don't want anything to dissolve, only to stick or to glom. We aren't making dough here, we are making flaky, light crust. Water drowns. You may be tempted to use more than 3/4 of a cup, but believe me, don't go north of a cup and a quarter, or you risk taking all of the air out, and turning your crust into a hard, thick shell. The flakiness is accomplished by trapping pockets of steam between the layers of butter and flour, and if the water is completely dissolved into the flour and butter, you end up with culinary concrete (that's why after they pour concrete, they go through it with a Giant Vibrator Thingy to get out all the air bubbles - no one likes flaky concrete, apparently).

Once you've completed your Proto-Asteroid Field, divide the Mass in half, and gently press each half into a ball shape. Again, don't overdo it - your hands are hot, and will melt the butter. Don't pack it like a snowball - apply enough light pressure so that the ball stays together. Coat your rolling surface and rolling pin with a dusting of flour. Take the first ball and drop it onto your rolling area, and put the bowl with the other ball into the refrigerator to keep it cool. Press the first ball into a one-inch high disc with your palm, and then begin rolling it out, until you have a crust that is approximately 1/8 inch thick. Depending on how good you are at rolling, you probably won't end up with a perfectly round disc. As long as you've got 12-13 inches in diameter of crust somewhere in the middle of your amorphous blob, you should be fine.

Now, fold the crust in half, then in half again, and then put it in the refrigerator to keep it cool. This makes it a lot easier to apply to the pie plate (and to the top of your pie later on).

Repeat this process with the other ball of pie dough (I hate calling it that, because it isn't really dough, it's an Uncomfortable Un-Assimilated Arrangement of Pie Crust Elements, or to paraphrase Monty Python, an Anarcho-Syndicalist Pie Crust Commune. What, afraid of a few bolsheviks in your washroom, are you?).

Take a break, you've earned it. Have a snog of bourbon to calm your nerves (a snog is a kiss, bee-tee-dubs, and someone once told me that nothing is sexier than a bourbon-soaked kiss, although Miss E. Lee strongly disagrees).

Complete the Pie Filling
Pour all the water out of your apple pieces, and pat each piece dry with a paper towel. No, I'm not kidding. Too much water in your filling and you'll end up with molten apple pie soup under your crust. Add your sugar, salt, and vanilla, and mix with a spoon until all of the apple pieces are coated in sugary, vanilline glory. Salt is obligatory.

Assemble The Mothership
Grease your pie plate with a pat of butter, and then place the center point of your crust centerfold into the center of the pie plate. Unfurl your freaky crust flag, and let it drape over the edges of the pie plate, gently pushing the crust into the bottom reaches and sides of the plate. Use some scissors to cut off any excess crust that extends beyond the edges of the pie plate. Now, add your filling, and drop your flair butter on top of the apple filling. If your apples were quite large, you may not need to use all of the filling - add enough so that the filling fills the entire plate, and then a little more so that the apples form a raised, smoothish dome in the center of the pie. Too few apples, and you'll end up with a depressed-looking pie; too many, and you'll have a revolution on your hands, with tons of molten apple pie overflowing your crust borders and smoking out your kitchen.
Now, to top it all off. Take your second pie crust centerfold out of the fridge, and placing the center point on the center of the apple filling mountain, unfold crust flag numero deux. You should have enough crust extending over the edges of the bottom crust layer that you can again use scissors to trim. Working your way around the plate, lift the bottom crust layer up and tuck the top layer underneath, gently pressing the two sides together to seal the puppy up. You don't want to press too hard, or the crust will end up tough, but you also don't want to let all the juicy apple goodness boil out the sides and onto the 450-degree surface of your oven (guaranteed to set off your smoke alarm). Feel free to scallop the edges, or to use a fork to make a decorative pattern in the edge of the crust. It matters not to me (I didn't say this was the Most Beautiful Apple Pie In the World Recipe, just the Best Tasting.) Depending on how large your apples were, you should end up with something that resembles this:

You may end up with small holes or tears in your crust - just use some of the excess to patch things up. Now brush the milk over the top of the crust, making sure to not let milk puddles form in the nooks and crannies - dab the extra milk out of there with a paper towel (JS insists, not me). Finally, sprinkle your flair sugar all over the top, depending on how sugary you like your crust to be on top. It's really just for show, because the apple filling is sweet enough as it is.

Place the pie plate on a baking sheet and put in your pre-heated oven for approximately 25 to 40 minutes, or until the crust is golden brown all around. Rotate the pie a half-turn, then reduce the heat to 375 degrees and bake until the pie has been in the oven for a total of one whole hour (35 minutes if the browning-all-around only took 25 minutes, and 20 minutes if the browning took 40 minutes.) If the edges of the crust start to get very dark much sooner than the rest of the crust, you can cover the outer edges with tinfoil to slow things down. It's almost impossible to prevent the pie filling from boiling over and out of the crust, and that's ok. Just as long as things don't get out of hand. The glory of a glass pie plate allows you to see how well the bottom crust is cooked.

To Vent Or Not To Vent? A lot of people like to cut cutesy vent patterns or holes in the top of their crusts, but JS says that Marion Cunningham doesn't believe in them. And if Mrs. C was savvy enough to act as the Fonz's surrogate mom, well then I wouldn't doubt her pie-making abilities. I only vent when my pie looks as if it's about to explode - sometimes, so much steam builds up that the upper crust begins to rise up away from the apple filling. This looks cool, but once the pie has cooled down, and you cut into it to serve, you end up with a big gap between the apples and the crust. So vent if you want to make sure the crust doesn't lift away from the filling, but not just to make it look cute. You can vent after the pie has begun baking if you start to feel uneasy about the occurrence of a molten apple pie filling revolution (venting, like television, eases societal tensions by providing a release valve for the resentment caused by the perception of class differences, but I digress).

Before you eat the pie, let it cool for as long as you can stand it (usually long enough for your significant other to run to the grocery store for some vanilla ice cream, because Mr. Luz forgot to tell you that it is one of the essential ingredients for this recipe).

Once you've mastered the Crust Massage, you can make virtually any kind of pie. Try Strawberry Rhubarb next, and remember, keep those filling ingredients as dry as possible, and keep your Butter Cold. For extra extra flaky (but less tasty) crust, use 1 1/2 cups of Crisco or pure lard (the kind only your local butcher will sell you, not the stuff you find in a supermarket). Under no circumstances shall you use any medieval spices in your fruit filling mixture, particularly not any cinnamon or nutmeg or mace or cloves. Apple with cinnamon is like Apple in Blackface - it's not funny, artful or ironic at all, despite what Australians, Spike Lee, or Ted Danson might think. It's just plain offensive.

Cheers,

Mr. Luz

Christmas Dinner, 2009: An Embarassment of Riches (with Recipes!)

2009-12-29T04:19:00.000-08:00

This year, for the first time in my young life, no one cooked Christmas dinner. Rather than travel to Missouri for the holidays, Mr. Luz and I stayed home in D.C., video Skyped with our loved ones, and ate leftovers--partially to recover from our Christmas Eve feast at Bistrot Lepic, and partially to mentally and physically prepare for the Christmas dinner we cooked for our friends the next day.

Yep...Mr. Luz and I cooked our very first Christmas dinner this weekend. I'm no Julia, we were able to dig into our Favorite Flavors Repository and come up with a satisfying and kind-of-almost-healthy-ish meal to share with friends by the glow of the Christmas tree.

And for once, I didn't have even the tiniest of meltdowns. Mr. Luz and I worked together and managed to feed 12 people out of a kitchen the size of a refrigerator box without any injuries, tears, or low-blood sugar freak outs. And as everyone squeezed into our living room, and the volume got louder and smiles got brighter throughout the evening, I felt blessed-like the richest woman in the world. I'm really proud of our beautiful meal. And Mr. Luz, thanks for being my calm, dedicated co-Chef this Christmas. I love you.

Christmas Dinner Menu for 12 (recipes below):

Assorted Appetizers

Smoked Turkey
Baked Acorn Squash with Butter and Cinnamon
Gremolata Greenbeans
Smoked Oyster New Orleans Style Stuffing

The Best Apple Pie In The World (recipe pending in future post)

Smoked Turkey Recipe: See this link to a previous post

Baked Acorn Squash with Butter and Brown Sugar Recipe:
This recipe is elegant, simple, and traditional. If you don't want to serve the squash pieces individually, simply halve the squash, and after baking spoon out the squash and mash it to a puree for serving.

3-4 large Acorn Squash, seeds and strings removed
3 Tbs. butter
6 Tbs. brown sugar
salt and pepper

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees. Quarter the squash, and arrange on a rimmed baking sheet, skin side down. Add a few Tbs. of water to the baking sheet to steam squash and keep skins from burning.

Spoon pieces of butter and brown sugar into the concave part of the squash. Sprinkle with salt and pepper. Bake for 45 min. to an hour, until the squash is soft all the way through and browned a bit on top. Serve.

Gremolata Green beans Recipe:
This dish serves as the perfect bright, garlicky foil to a traditional rich, sweet holiday menu and it's so versatile. Make it ahead of time and serve it at room temperature. These green beans are so tasty, we eat them like dessert...a few bites at a time, all day long. We acquired the recipe after a friend brought them to Thanksgiving this year, so I can't take credit, but they were too good not to pass along.

2 pounds green beans
4 Tbs. minced garlic
1/2 cup extra virgin olive oil
Zest of 8 lemons (yellow part only)
2 bunches Italian parsley, leaves only, chopped
1/2 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese
2 tsp. kosher salt
1 tsp. black pepper
Juice of 1 lemon, or to taste

Blanch the green beans in a pot of boiling salted water for 1 to 1 1/2 minutes; drain and plunge into ice water. Drain well. Transfer to a serving bowl.

Saute the garlic in olive oil over medium-low heat for 2 minutes or just until the garlic turns white. Do not let it brown. Pour over the beans and toss to combine.

Combine the lemon zest, parsley, cheese, salt and pepper. Sprinkle on the beans, and toss. Add the lemon juice, toss again, and taste. Adjust seasonings with salt, pepper and more lemon juice, to taste.

NOTE: Mr. Luz likes to throw the topping ingredients, raw garlic, cheese and all, into the food processer and then toss the blanched greenbeans, olive oil, lemon juice, and food processed topping all together before serving. To him, flash cooking the garlic takes some of the fun out of the dish, and electronics are more fun than chopping.

Smoked Oyster French Bread Stuffing
I love a sweet, salty, umami-tasting oyster with just about everything, but especially when it adds unexpected elegance and subtlety to a holiday stuffing/dressing. I've been eating this stuff for breakfast since Saturday.

2 large loaves stale French bread, cut into 1/2 inch cubes
2 cups fresh oysters in their own liquor
1 1/2 cups smoked oysters, rinsed and coarse chopped
1 bunch fresh parsley leaves, chopped
2 bunches green onions, chopped
1/2 bell pepper, diced
1 large onion, diced
4 ribs celery, diced
3 cloves garlic, chopped
1 Tbs. bacon grease
1 cup butter
2 Tbs. of your favorite fresh savory herb(s), chopped (thyme, sage, rosemary)
Salt and red pepper to taste
2 cups chicken stock
Dry the bread cubes on a baking sheet all day, or in a 200 degree oven, until crispy.

Melt 1/2 cup butter and bacon grease over medium heat in a large pan. Add the bell pepper, onion, celery and saute until translucent. Add the garlic, green onion, and parsley and saute 2 more minutes.

Combine the sauteed vegetables, bread cubes, smoked and fresh oysters, with their liquor, savory herbs, salt and red pepper and chicken stock in a large bowl and mix well. Spoon the dressing into a baking dish. Dot with the remaining 1/2 cup butter. Bake at 350 until brown and bubbly--approximately 35-45 minutes.

How to Smoke a Turkey on a Weber Kettle Grill

2009-12-27T16:17:00.000-08:00

OhmyGodohmyGodohmyGodohmyGod, Look What I Did!! Seriously, I did that. And I maybe cried a few happy tears when I saw that bronze lacquered skin, and heard the meat thermometer beep as it reached 160 degrees.

This post should be called "The Smoked Turkey Experiment," because I essentially read a few vague web pages, threw this big boy in the Weber kettle, chugged a few glasses of wine to take the edge off my fretting, and hoped that instinct and the aforementioned meat thermometer would see me through. (The thermometer is amazing, FYI--it has a pager that goes off when the desired temp. is reached. Drunk grilling just got a whole lot easier.) Hypothesis: If you can start a charcoal grill, you can smoke a turkey. Conclusion: Affirmed.

Let the record show, I have never even roasted a turkey. I've never really roasted anything--when your parents keep your spoiled ass set up with kitchen gadgets like a countertop rotisserie, you don't roast, you rotisserize. If I can pull this off, anyone can, and should.

The smoked turkey had a beautiful, flavorful skin and the meat had a juicy texture that was tender, not chewy. Mr. Luz carved the bird, and he kept sort of giggling and mumbling "..so tender...falling off the bone..." And it was so smooth, rich, and smokey in flavor. Later, after a few bottles of wine, Mr. Luz called it 1.) the best turkey he'd ever tasted and 2.) in the top 5 best tasting meats he'd ever had. (When asked to do impressions, a wine-soaked Mr. Luz did: Mama BaCon--"I got you some tupperware, and it fits the whole universe." Papa BaCon--"The Hunley is a magnificent watercraft, simply stunning." Me: "F*** you, you f****** b****." He doesn't remember doing them, but they were pretty accurate.)

Instructions:

1. If using a brine, thaw your turkey at least 32 hours before you cook it. Once thawed, prepare the brine and soak your turkey for 24 hours plus. This Serious Eats Food Lab article is the best I've read on how and why you brine a turkey. Before smoking, thoroughly rinse your turkey in cold water. *NOTE: I didn't get the turkey in time to brine it, and it was still fantastic, but brining would take it to the next level. *

2. If not brining, thaw your turkey in the fridge for two days, or use the cold-water method just before smoking. (Soak in cold water, in the packaging, changing the water ever 30 minutes. It takes approximately 30 minutes per pound.)

3. Soak 3-4 handfuls of mesquite wood chips in water. 1 hour minimum for chips, 4+ hours for large knots of wood.

3. Once the turkey has thawed, remove giblets/neck from turkey and rinse inside and out. Pat dry. If your turkey is 16+ lbs. you might want to cut the entire turkey in half at this time. Yes, this is the cheater way to do it, but you'll avoid black turkey skin, and you won't fret/gulp wine for 8+ hours, wondering if the damned thing is even cooking.

4. Prepare 1 chimney of hot charcoal. Place a pan of liquid on the center of your bottom grate (water, wine, beer, broth, ect.) and spread the hot coals around it. Add 5-7 cold coals to the hot coals. Put the 3/4 of the soaked wood chips on top of the hot coals, open the bottom and top vents on the grill, and close the lid.

5. Cover your turkey inside and out with olive oil/melted butter and salt, pepper, dried thyme, and cayenne pepper. Put the turkey on the grill grate, breast side up, placing the turkey directly over the liquid-filled drip pan. (If you cut your turkey in half, put the meat facing up and the bones facing down.)

6. Every hour, quickly check your coals and baste your bird with more butter/olive oil. Halfway through smoking, prepare another chimney of hot coals and add it to your Weber grill, along with the last 1/4 of the wood chips. Your bird will generally need 30 minutes per pound to cook, and if you cut it in half then count the time based on the weight of 1/2 the turkey. Every time you open the lid, you increase your cooking time so do it sparingly. Trust me, it's cooking.

7. When a meat thermometer inserted in the breast but not touching the bone (ESSENTIAL) reaches 160 degrees, your bird is done and safe to eat. Carefully remove it from the grill, let it rest at least 15 minutes, carve, and serve.

Merry Christmas To All, with Snickerdoodles

2009-12-24T09:00:00.000-08:00

Ok, really, Merry Christmas this time.

It's 1pm on Christmas Eve, and I'm just about to leave work to go watch Harry Potter, eat snickerdoodles, and sleep on my couch until Mr. Luz gets home.

After that, we will get gussied up and go eat lots of confit'ed meats and cheese at Bistrot Lepic's Christmas Eve dinner. I supremely hope that the restaurant is decorated with pine garlands, red velvet bows, and candles. I don't know...that's just how I picture a romantic, grown-up Christmas dinner, just me and my man. (In my head, I'm also wearing the most amazing mile-high purple stilettos amidst the pine garland. Just so you get a complete picture.)

Also, because I know you're wondering, here's the etymology of "gussied up": it's a fairly modern term, and "Gussy" or "Gussie" was originally applied to an effeminate or weak person. British or Australian in origin.

I'm very, very excited for our grown-up Christmas. How will you celebrate the holidays this year?

Snickerdoodle Recipe, from allrecipes.com

1/2 cup butter, softened
1/2 cup shortening
1 1/2 cups white sugar
2 eggs
2 tsp. vanilla extract
2 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons cream of tartar
1 tsp. baking soda
1/4 tsp. salt
2 Tbs. white sugar
2 tsp. ground cinnamon

Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.

Cream together butter, shortening, 1 1/2 cups sugar, the eggs and the vanilla. Blend in the flour, cream of tartar, soda and salt.

Shape dough by rounded spoonfuls into balls. Mix the 2 tablespoons sugar and the cinnamon. Roll balls of dough in mixture.

Place 2 inches apart on ungreased baking sheets. Bake 8 minutes, or until barely set. Let cool a bit, then remove from cookie sheets to cool further.

Gingerbread Rowhouses & A Very Daring Bakers Christmas

2009-12-23T08:23:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and a Joyous New Year to you, dear readers and ravenous eaters!

Mr. Luz and I are having our very first grownup Christmas, just the two of us and Foxy, this year. I'm so very excited that I'm not getting on a plane and leaving my Christmas tree behind this December! And as we're snuggling on the couch by the glow of our tree this Christmas, I will be thinking of you guys, and I'll feeling very thankful for all of the friends I've come to know or gotten closer to thanks to the blog.

This month's Daring Bakers challenge was, of course, a gingerbread house! I made a gingerbread version of our row house and our neighbors, Val and Lauren's, rowhouse. The whole process was really fun and not as difficult as I was expecting. Apparently, royal icing fixes a multitude of sins.

The December 2009 Daring Bakers’ challenge was brought to you by Anna of Very Small Anna and Y of Lemonpi. They chose to challenge Daring Bakers’ everywhere to bake and assemble a gingerbread house from scratch. They chose recipes from Good Housekeeping and from The Great Scandinavian Baking Book as the challenge recipes.

Anna's Recipe: Spicy Gingerbread Dough (from Good Housekeeping)

2 1/2 cups packed dark brown sugar
1 1/2 cups heavy cream or whipping cream
1 1/4 cups molasses
9 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
2 Tbs. baking soda
1 Tbs. ground ginger

1. In very large bowl, with wire whisk (or with an electric mixer), beat brown sugar, cream, and molasses until sugar lumps dissolve and mixture is smooth. In medium bowl, combine flour, baking soda, and ginger. With spoon, stir flour mixture into cream mixture in 3 additions until dough is too stiff to stir, then knead with hands until flour is incorporated and dough is smooth.*At this time, the dough was a little dry. I added more milk Tbs. by Tbs. until it held together.*

2. Divide dough into 4 equal portions; flatten each into a disk to speed chilling. Wrap each disk well with plastic wrap and refrigerate at least 4 hours or overnight, until dough is firm enough to roll.

3. Grease and flour large cookie sheets (17-inch by 14-inch/43x36cm)

4. Roll out dough, 1 disk at a time on each cookie sheet to about 3/16-inch thickness. (Placing 3/16-inch dowels or rulers on either side of dough to use as a guide will help roll dough to uniform thickness.) *Rolling out gingerbread dough is a Great workout, FYI*

Cutting out my template, using a book from my Feminist Theory class in undergrad so I can conceptualize my lil' rowhouses AND get some education at the same time.

5. Trim excess dough from cookie sheet; wrap and reserve in refrigerator. Chill rolled dough on cookie sheet in refrigerator or freezer at least 10 minutes or until firm enough to cut easily.

6. Preheat oven to 300 degrees F.

7. Use chilled rolled dough, floured poster board patterns, and sharp paring knife to cut all house pieces on cookie sheet, making sure to leave at least 1 1/4 inches between pieces because dough will expand slightly during baking. Wrap and reserve trimmings in refrigerator. Combine and use trimmings as necessary to complete house and other decorative pieces. Cut and bake large pieces and small pieces separately.

8. Chill for 10 minutes before baking if the dough seems really soft after you cut it. This will discourage too much spreading/warping.

9. Bake 25 to 30 minutes, until pieces are firm to the touch. Do not overbake.

Complete template & obligatory DB glass(es) of wine (with extra roof for 3rd rowhouse I gave up on after baking for 4 hours)

10. Remove cookie sheet from oven. While house pieces are still warm, place poster-board patterns on top and use them as guides to trim shapes to match if necessary. Cool pieces completely before attempting to assemble the house.

Assembling the House:

Decorate your pieces with piped and painted royal icing and edible decorations--Recipe Below--before assembling your house.

To "paint" your gingerbread like I did, put a moderate amount of royal icing in a small bowl, add 1 Tbs. of water and add food coloring to get the desired color. Paint on with a paintbrush.

To create caramel windows, put your gingerbread pieces with the windows cut out on a silpat or parchment paper covered with non-stick cooking spray. Mix 1 cup of sugar and 1 Tbs. of water in a heavy-bottomed pan. Bring sugar mixture to medium-high heat and as sugar begins to melt, slowly stir unmelted sugar into the melted sugar. Once it's mostly incorporated, stop stirring and instead gently shake the pan to even out the heat distribution and stir the mixture. (If you stir it, you'll get little bubbles throughout your caramel mixture and your windows will be too opaque.)

When a small bit of caramel dropped into a glass of water forms a "hard ball" you're ready to pour your mixture into your window cutouts. Let the caramel cool until it's hard and easily releases from the parchment paper/silpat. *Note: If you choose to light your gingerbread house with corded vs. battery operated Christmas lights, tape them to your base to keep them from knocking your gingerbread walls around, and cut a small notch in your gingerbread piece to accommodate the wire.*

Once your decorated pieces have dried, carefully assemble them using tension and various household items to keep them standing while they dry. IF you make a dual or triple row house, be sure to include an inside wall between the rowhouses so that your roof doesn't collapse.

My house with supplies in the background. I read that the 100 calorie pack Oreo snacks made great shingles, and they did! Adorable, and a fun shape to work with.

Complete Gingerbread Rowhouses, with Happy Holidays cookie-message on top.

Royal Icing Recipe:

3 egg whites
1/2 Tbs. cream of tartar
4 cups powdered sugar

Beat egg whites and cream of tartar till fluffy. Add powdered sugar, 1/2 cup at a time, until incorporated. Your mixture should be stiff and slightly cement-like. Use immediately and cover any unused portions with a damp cloth until you're ready to work with it.

Foxy, looking frightened of the GIANT bag of flour I had to buy for this challenge

Snowed In! Famous Barr's French Onion Soup Recipe

2009-12-22T00:38:00.000-08:00

Famous Barr's french onion soup is renowned in St. Louis, and for good reason. My parents' generation would line up at the old department store's restaurant just to get a bowl after a day of window shopping. My generation has grown up hearing about the soup, and I was lucky enough to have a mom with the recipe and the patience to make it. Mama BaCon sent me this recipe years ago, and I love making it as much as I love eating it--your house smells so amazing as the onions simmer in pure sweet butter for 1 1/2 hours (yeeessss!!!).

My craving for Famous Barr's french onion soup was so strong this weekend that Mr. Luz went out in 17 inches of snow to pick up the necessities for the recipe. (Truth be told, we were out of beer and wine and the Saints were playing that night, so he had to go out anyway.) After he'd dug the truck out of the alley and mentally prepared to slide his way to the Safeway, Mr. Luz peeked his head in the front door and asked "What do you need for the recipe?" My reply-"Cheese, bread, 5 lbs. of onions, and 7 large cans of beef stock." This is truly the stuff of dreams, people.

I'll post the recipe exactly as it was originally published, with my tips and comments at the end (I've read that the St. Louis Post Dispatch published the recipe some time ago, but Mama BaCon got a copy when she bought these adorable Scandinavian-inspired soup crocks from the department store before it closed.)

This is what 5 lbs. of onions, peeled & sliced, looks like before the 90 minute saute in butter
This is what 5 lbs. of onions looks like after a 90 minute saute in butter. Nom. Nom. Nom.
Famous Barr's French Onion Soup Recipe:

5 lbs onions, unpeeled
1/2 cup butter
1 1/2 tsp. black pepper
2 Tbs. paprika
1 bay leaf
7 (16 oz.) cans beef broth, divided
1 cup dry white wine (optional)
3/4 cup all-purpose flour or instant flour
Caramel coloring (optional) or Kitchen Bouquet (optional)
2 tsp. salt
French baguettes (optional)
Swiss cheese (optional) or gruyere cheese (optional)

1. Peel onions and slice 1/8 inch thick, preferably in a food processor.
2. Melt butter in a 6-quart (or larger) stockpot. Add onions; cook, uncovered, over low heat for 1 1/2 hours, stirring occasionally.
3. Stir in pepper, paprika and bay leaf; saute over low heat 10 minutes more, stirring frequently. 4. Pour in 6 cans broth and wine. Increase heat and bring to a boil.
5. Dissolve flour in remaining 1 can broth.
6. Stir into boiling soup.
7. Reduce heat and simmer slowly for 2 hours.
8. Adjust color to a rich brown with caramel coloring, season with salt. Refrigerate overnight. To serve, heat soup in microwave or on stove top.
9. If desired, pour into ovenproof crocks or bowls.
10. Top with a slice of bread and a sprinkling of grated cheese. Heat under the broiler until cheese melts and bubbles, about 5 minutes.
11. Leftover soup can be frozen.This recipe makes about 1 gallon of soup.

Tips and Tricks:

I have to split my recipe into two pots to add the correct amount of broth. After the 2 hour simmer, I can usually put them back together.
I increase the salt a bit, and add some cayenne pepper and extra black pepper for the tiniest bit of zip.
Don't skip or skimp on the paprika. Besides the caramelized onions, it's what makes this recipe.
This recipe says that the cheese and bread are optional. They are NOT optional.
Rather than putting the whole bowl of soup under the broiler, I make cheese toast in the broiler or toaster oven to float on top. No burnt paws that way.
I also slice the edges of the french bread pieces so that you can easily separate one bite of cheese bread with your spoon. If you don't slice the edges, you can sit there hacking away at the chewy french bread crust with an ineffectual lil' spoon forever.
"Kitchen Bouquet"...tee hee.

Spicy Cioppino Recipe with Fennel and Herbs

2009-12-21T08:10:00.000-08:00

Two weeks ago, Mr. Luz and I had the pleasure of cozying up for the weekend in beautiful Berkeley Springs, West Virginia with two of our favorite people.

We laughed alot, ate alot, and didn't change out of our pajamas at all on Saturday. It was preeettty fantastic, and just what we needed.

Whenever we go to WV, I like to cook something super-tasty as a "Thank You" to Rick and Kate, our hosts, for inviting us to their perfect get-a-way.

This time I decided to make cioppino, a tomato-based seafood stew, because it's tangy, rich, and so filling. My favorite part of the cioppino is the fennel--it adds a freshness to every bite and nicely complements the the tomato and seafood flavors without overpowering the dish.

I especially like this recipe because blending the base adds flavor while letting the seafood really steal the show-presentation-wise. And you can make the base ahead of time and then throw in the seafood right before you serve it for maximum freshness. It seems like a daunting list of ingredients and steps, but everything cooks quickly and provides great flavor. To speed up the process, you can skip the blending step and just let your cioppino be chunky, and you throw the fish into the pot to cook with the rest of the seafood, but it will fall apart once you start stirring it up with those mussel shells.

Requisite Cute Foxy Shot.....

Cioppino--Tomato and Fennel Seafood Stew Recipe

3 Tbs. olive oil
1 medium onion, chopped
6 garlic cloves, peeled and crushed
1/4 cup tomato paste
2 cans of diced tomatoes in juice
1 bunch fresh basil
2 sprigs fresh thyme
2 large fresh parsley sprigs
1 tsp. dried oregano
1 bay leaf
1 tsp. cayenne pepper
4 cups shrimp stock
1 cup clam stock

1 lb. mussels, scrubbed and debearded
1 lb. large uncooked shrimp, peeled and deveined
1 1/2 lb. firm fish, cut into 2 inch chunks
1/2 cup chopped fresh parsley
1 large fennel bulb, thin sliced
2 cups white wine
3 Tbs. flour
2 Tbs. butter
Salt and Pepper to taste

To make the base:

Heat the oil in a large pot. Add the onion and garlic and saute until cooked. Stir in tomato paste and saute, stirring frequently, until slightly browned. Add the tomatoes, herbs, and shrimp and clam stock. Bring to a boil, then reduce to a simmer. Simmer for 1 hour, uncovered.

Allow the base to slightly cool. Remove bay leaf and any remaining thyme and parsley ribs. Add the base to a blender and blend to a thick, slightly chunky soup.

To make the stew:

Bring the blended base to a simmer. Add the wine, chopped parsley, and fennel and simmer for 10 minutes. Taste and season with salt and pepper if necessary.

Rinse and pat dry the fish cubes. Dredge the fish in flour with salt and pepper. Melt the butter in a large, shallow pan over medium heat. Add the fish to the pan and cook, stirring gently, until browned.

Add mussels and shrimp to the stew base, cover, and cook until the mussels are open and the shrimp are done. 5-7 minutes. To serve, put the fish in the bottom of a bowl and cover with the stew.

Mr. Luz doesn't hold back with his handmade Sourdough breadbowl...

Louisiana in Two Parts: What's Happiness All About?

2009-12-19T10:17:00.000-08:00

Two conclusions from recent studies strike me as...well...interesting.

Conclusion #1: Louisiana ranks as the worst state in the U.S. for overall quality of life.
Conclusion #2: Louisiana ranks as the "Happiest State" in the U.S.

Methodology aside, both conclusions have merit. Louisiana is a corrupt state, sometimes unabashedly and unapologetically so. That leads to insufficient infrastructure--poor schools, a lack of funds for important government programs as money gets shoveled to cronies and cousins rather than to the public where it belongs, and businesses left to fend for themselves in a state with few exports. People talk trash about New Orleans, but the corruption is everywhere. Just do a quick google search of the scandals surrounding the Louisiana Public Service Commission, and you'll see that in Baton Rouge "who you know" means so much more than "what you know."

But Louisiana is also a state where people have fought to maintain a highly satisfying way of life that's counter to the fast-paced, million-dollar-paycheck culture we've come to accept in the rest of the U.S. In Louisiana, food, family, and community are generally prioritized over money and prestige (unless you're in govt., of course). People look out for and genuinely enjoy one another, and the hours are marked by Abita beers consumed, stories told, and the number of friends who stop by. It's a place where you're well-regarded so long as you're just being yourself--the local heroes are the folks who are the kookiest and also the most comfortable with their eccentricities. (See Granny Cart Lady to the left. She attended Tulane classes...and got kicked out of Tulane classes...on and off and would show up at many a Mardi Gras parade. R.I.P. GCL)

It's impossible to be alone in New Orleans...even and especially after a Category 5 hurricane comes knocking down your door. Everyone is your friend, and every day is a special occasion to be celebrated.

I can come up with a handful of hypothesis that explain these seemingly incongruous conclusions, but each of them would oversimplify the deep memory and collective soul of a place as diverse and storied as New Orleans. Instead, I'll just think about the following: Residents of New Orleans and the inhabitants of Louisiana in general largely came to the state with their own unique culture and history, and settled there as a place of last resort. Over time they have struggled together to thrive, rather than just survive, in an inhospitable place prone to swampy conditions, hurricanes, and the rampant abuses of the oldest Good Ole' Boy network in the U.S. And together, they have come to conclude--among many, many other things--that every day is a gift to be shared with loved ones and enjoyed, rather than wasted on 15-hour work days and superficial pursuits. They have created their own happiness out dire circumstances. In sum, we could all learn something about happiness from the bunch of drunken, garrulous 'yats that I'm proud to call my own.

Christmas Memories

2009-12-18T08:21:00.000-08:00

The first thing that my mom ever sat me down and taught me was how to decorate a Christmas tree.

She went through, step by step, and told me how to add the lights without showing too much of the wire, and how to make sure that the tree was evenly lit. She spread out all of the ornaments on the coffee table, and we chose where each one would go. Some were large, and needed alot of space to hang. Some looked best hung in front or behind a light bulb. And of course, the smallest and lightest ones go on top. Together we stepped back from the tree to see if there were any blank spots in need of an ornament, a candle, or some ribbon. Decorating the tree was a process, a project, and when we were done I was so proud of our creation, and felt so lucky that she trusted me with our beautiful family tree.

I miss you Mama BaCon. Thanks for all of the wonderful memories, and for teaching me about the important things in life.

Wild Mushroom Risotto Recipe and Eff-You, 2009

2009-12-13T20:19:00.000-08:00

Like most food bloggers, I've been a total slacker this holiday season. I've continued cooking and baking like a mad woman, but I've fallen off on blogging, mainly because of what I'll call The Macro Effect.

The Macro Effect is the term I came up with to describe the hyper-styled, "perfection in a food photo" approach that magazines, cookbooks, and now food blogs take to recipe sharing (and named after the setting on my camera that conveniently allows me to zoom in on the pristine image of the food and shut out all of the dusty crap and empty wine bottles in my dining room). If I'm being honest, my blogging declines when I'm busy thanks to the Macro Effect, because I don't have enough light/time/creativity to take the food photos that I want to for my posts. Sure, I dream of book deals, but I blog to express myself and connect with people who share my passions, so I shouldn't let the Macro Effect keep me from posting. (Also, I wouldn't trade places with Julie Powell for a second. Nora Ephron and Amy Adams?! Are you kidding me?!)

Folks who write about these things hypothesize that the Macro Effect has caused food blogs to become more commercial to their detriment. The argument is that we get enough glossy perfection every time we turn on the TV. Food blogs should allow people to connect on a real and personal level about real life and real food, rather than simply tossing around recipes and cutesy, sterilized anecdotes while painting a reality where people eat on adorable china with a fresh-picked bunch of yellow daisies "casually tossed" next to their tomato bisque every day. Food bloggers keep a majority of their stresses--illness, heartbreak, or just run-of-the-mill disappointment--out of their blogs. The internal reasoning goes something like this: Journalists don't talk about their messy divorce in an article on seasonal preparations of spaghetti squash, so I should keep my personal life private as well. But again, the argument goes, food bloggers shouldn't hide behind their commercial aims because part of what they "sell" is the experience of being human, and all the emotions and difficulties that go along with that.

I can understand their criticism, though I'm not entirely ready to give up my cutesy anecdotes and my serving plates sourced from Salvation Armys far and wide. However, as penance for me letting the Macro Effect keep me from posting, and posting honestly, I will: post an ugly photo (see above) for my Wild Mushroom Risotto with Manchego Cheese recipe (see below) and tell you, readers, that it has been sort of a shit year, emotionally, here at BaCon. In the grand scheme of things, I am very blessed. I have a close, happy family that is made up of some of my favorite people on the planet, a great job, and an understanding and deeply passionate partner who loves me for all of my imperfections rather than in spite of them. I have also lost two very close friends in the past 4 months--they haven't passed away, there has just been a decision to "part ways," and it's been very difficult for me. I know it seems silly, but here are 2 people who know me better than anyone, and in the past 120 days they've both decided after years of friendship to give me up in one way or another. And although I'm very blessed, all of that doesn't keep me from feeling sad, hurt, and sometimes angry about how everything has worked out.

I'm hoping reconciliation is possible with one of them. But I didn't want to just write about the reconciliation, citing peace and the magic of forgiveness and all that, after the fact and without the mess. Because that would just be soo Macro Effect, wouldn't it? So, here's the mess. I'm a lucky, lucky girl who sometimes feels very lost, and who maybe has done something to drive her two best friends away in completely separate instances. Or maybe they weren't really my best friends. Or maybe they were, and relationships just change. And maybe I can be close with one of them again, some day.

And for bearing with me through all of this, here's a yummy, creamy and rich (vegetarian!) Mushroom Risotto recipe for you. Thanks for listening.

Wild Mushroom Risotto with Manchego and Parsley:

8 cups mushroom or vegetable broth
1 oz. dried wild mushrooms, reconstituted with 1 cup hot water & chopped
1 1/2 Tbs. olive oil
1 medium onion, diced
2 large garlic cloves, minced
1 1/2 lb. portabella mushrooms, gills removed and chopped small (or 1lb. baby bellas, chopped)
2 bay leaves
2 Tbs. fresh thyme, chopped
1/4 cup fresh Italian parsley, chopped
1 tsp. Cinnamon
Salt and black pepper to taste
2 cups Arborio rice
1/2 cup dry white wine
1 cup Manchego cheese, chopped

Bring broth to a simmer. In a deep skillet or heavy bottomed pot, heat oil over medium heat. Add the onion and garlic and saute until translucent. Add the portabellas and cinnamon, salt and pepper, and saute until browned. Add rice and reconstituted mushrooms and cook, stirring, for 2 minutes. Don't let the rice brown. Pour in wine and cook until almost completely absorbed.

Add about 3 cups of warmed broth into rice and cook, stirring often and vigorously, until it's all absorbed. Add 2 cups and repeat. Add fresh herbs. Repeat broth/stirring steps, adding 1 cup of broth at a time until rice is tender and the sauce is very creamy. (This takes awhile. Grab a glass of wine and call me to talk about what's stressing YOU out. I owe you.)

Stir in cheese and continue cooking until melted. Serve promptly.

Pure Hedonism: Bistrot Du Coin's Beaujolais Nouveau Release 2009

2009-12-02T14:36:00.000-08:00

I pulled on my gold lamé top, wiggled into my black tights, and asked Mr. Luz, "are the heels on these shoes too high for a night of drinking and dancing?" on a typical Wednesday night, just like any other in D.C. Ok, if you insert "red velour tracksuit" for the gold top and tights, and change the quote to "How many Top Chef episodes do we have to watch to catch up before tonight's show?," then that would be the case. In reality, I was preparing to celebrate the most glorious of holidays in D.C....Beaujolais Nouveau Release Day.

On the third Thursday of November, France releases its most recent Beaujolais Nouveau wine vintage, (made from Gamay grapes grown and handpicked in the Beaujolais region of France) creating a festival-like atmosphere around the release and a virtual "race" to be the first to enjoy that year's harvest. It is rumored that by the time all of the Beaujolais Release events around the world have handed out their last bottle and swept their last revelers out the door, over half of the region's annual production (65 million bottles, ya'll) has been imbibed.

Of course, this is just a bit of brilliant marketing on behalf of the wily French. Except for exceptional vintages, Beaujolais Nouveau is not meant to be aged. It's a fruity, floral, light-bodied wine for quaffing within 9 months of bottling, so the French create a stir around the release to promote the early enjoyment of its baby wine. I'm happy to say that I enjoyed this year's Beaujolais Nouveau early and often at this year's Release Party at Bistrot Du Coin in D.C. You're welcome, France.

My hedonistic pursuits on the night of the Beaujolais Release Party did not stop with the black ankle strap 4 inch heels and plasticy metallic apparel. From there it snowballed into a cholesterol-laden feast, with Bistrot Du Coin's velvety chicken livers, luscious veal sweetbreads and cream sauce in a puff pastry, brothy mussels, crispy frites, and a big skillet of dark and rich lamb stew. After dinner and because we could only squeeze our party of 10 into the 7pm seating, we were forced to drink too much champagne and be merry until the actual Release at midnight. (Reservations for BdC's Beaujolais Release Party are slim, and good luck trying to get in as a mere drinker/dancer after the restaurant hits its fire-code capacity.) With the champagne came the dancing as diners cleared the floor, waiters cleared their tables to the far edges of a previously quaint restaurant, and the disco ball and club lights came up. And finally, as the bartenders began handing out plastic cups and free bottles of Beaujolais Nouveau at midnight, with the wine came dancing on the bar and (don't you wish you knew what was in this parenthesis?)

So maybe I'm not going to spill all my secrets, but suffice it to say that no one escaped BdC's Beaujolais Nouveau Release Party without doing something embarrassing, wearing purple wine-stained clothes, and giggling into a plastic cup of Beaujolais Nouveau. And I'm already counting down the days till the next third Thursday in November. France, you are awesome.

In Other News...

2009-11-18T14:11:00.001-08:00

I'm right smack in the middle of our Holiday/Wedding Travel Marathon (On the agenda: VA-MO-WV-KY-CA-WV-FL-LA-MO-LA in 6 months). That means that we're indulging in alot of fast/frozen food. And cooking, when it happens, has become a bit of a resentment as it's sandwiched between packing, cleaning, and crying into Foxy's sweet, sweet fur as I say goodbye for the 30th road trip. I promise that over Christmas, while I'm cozied up in my apartment with Mr. Luz and Fwaf and not going anywhere, I will post more wintry soups, casseroles, and braised meats than you can even imagine. You'll hate me come March when it's time to diet, I promise.

In the meantime, here are some Food News Headlines from this week with a little BaCon twist.

Critics Say UN Food Summit Wasteful, Ineffective
Quote from the International Committee of Concerned Mothers: “There are starving children in China who would kill for those caucuses”

Food Fight: Sarah Palin Ticks Off Vegetarians and Vegans in her New Book, 'Going Rogue'
Handlers say that now the only people who are not pissed off at the idiocy of Sarah Palin are Rush Limbaugh and...Sarah Palin.

Burger King Franchisees: Management's Ideas 'Ill-conceived'
Franchisees say that new burger promotions vomit cash, cause major headaches, and make future agreements hard to swallow.

And in other Burger King news.....

Whoppers Tame Tigers for 2nd Win
Tigers say they are vegetarians. And pissed off at Sarah Palin.

Celebrate Halloween With a Spooky Good Menu!

2009-11-03T08:34:00.000-08:00

Yes, I'm lame. I had a huge table full of food at our Halloween shindig, and I took nary a picture. BUT I have a good excuse. There was a keg of really, really good beer (Magic Hat #9) on ice in our backyard. And when the question is: Food blogging or Yummy Beer, well, you can guess which one wins every time.

But I am posting the menu, sans photos, with the recipes I have. I'll solicit the remaining recipes as we go:

BBQ Pulled Pork Sliders
Jen K's Famous Empanadas (need recipe)
WJLauren's Goat Cheese Stuffed Dates (need recipe)
Apple Cider Doughnuts
Val's Spiderweb Cupcakes
Jen K's Chocolate Coconut Cookies (need recipe)
Butterscotch & Dark Chocolate Dipped Candy-Coated Pretzels

Celebrate Friends & Fall w/this Halloween Menu:

BBQ Pulled Pork Sliders
Have your guests build their own, so you don't have to! Serves approx. 25-30 "sliders"

1 recipe of BBQ Pulled Pork
30 dinner rolls of your choice, sliced like small hamburger buns
1 jar of small, round-cut Pickles, drained
1 Onion, thin sliced
3 Cups creamy coleslaw

Put the pulled pork in a crockpot set on warm with a small serving spoon or tongs. Set the buns, pickles, coleslaw, and onion around the crockpot and let your guests put together their own pulled pork sliders.

Apple Cider Doughnuts from Real Mom Kitchen & A Bowl of Mush
These cakey doughnuts are a huge hit in the Northeast, especially during apple-picking season. The cider is subtle and yummy, and I add a little nutmeg to the cinnamon sugar dusting for some extra zing.

1 Cup apple cider
1 Cup sugar
1/4 Cup of butter (softened)
2 large eggs
1/2 Cup buttermilk
3 1/2 Cups unbleached white flour
2 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. cinnamon
1/2 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. freshly grated nutmeg
oil for frying
1 cup cinnamon-sugar (pinch of nutmeg) for coating fried doughnuts

Boil cider until it reduces to 1/4 cup, allow it to cool completely.

Mix 3 1/2 cups flour, baking powder, baking soda, cinnamon, salt and nutmeg in a bowl. Set aside.

In the bowl of a stand mixer, cream butter and sugar. Add eggs, and mix until blended. Add buttermilk and reduced cider, blend until incorporated. Add flour mixture gradually, until just incorporated. Turn dough out on a well floured board, knead it a few times to make sure ingredients are well-mixed.

Pat or roll into a 1/2 inch thick circle. Using a 3" round cutter (or doughnut cutter), cut as many circles as you can. Cut smaller hole in center. Set aside centers to make doughnut holes, or collect them along with dough around the larger circles, form a ball, flatten to 1/2 inch and repeat the cutting of doughnuts. Heat appox 3 inches of oil in a high-sided pan or dutch oven. When oil is hot, place as many doughnuts/holes as will fit into pan without crowding them. Allow the doughnuts to brown, then turn them over and brown the other side. Remove them from the oil and set them on a paper towel. When all of the doughnuts are fried but still warm, coat them in the cinnamon sugar mixture and serve.

Simple, Spooky Spiderweb Cupcakes
The trick to these cupcakes is in the decorating. Simply make your favorite cupcakes, top with chocolate fudge icing and follow these simple directions for a cool, graphic cupcake design:

Fill a re-sealable plastic bag with a couple of heaping spoonfuls of white frosting and snip a tiny hole out of the bottom of one corner.
Pipe on three circles of white frosting for each cookie. Start in the middle with the smallest circle and work your way out.
Take a toothpick and beginning in the center, drag it lightly through each circle. Repeat all the way around the cookie.

Dark Chocolate & Butterscotch Dipped Candy-Coated Pretzels

I maybe only made these because I was craving butterscotch, but they were fun to make and everyone thought I bought them at a specialty candy store. Get yourself some extra Martha Stewart points and make some for your next party.

1 regular bag of the large pretzel rods
1 small bag of dark chocolate chips
1 small bag of butterscotch chips
Chocolate sprinkles
1 box of Reese's Pieces, crushed-the dustier the better, actually

For chocolate dipped pretzels: Fill a tall pint-sized water glass halfway with chocolate chips. Melt in the microwave for 40 seconds, then stir. Continue microwaving for 20 seconds and stirring until everything is melted. Swirl the pretzel rod in the chocolate, up and down the sides of the glass, until half of the pretzel is coated in a thin layer of chocolate.

Over a separate plate, sprinkle the crushed candies over the chocolate. Prop the finished pretzels in a deep baking dish on the ledge so that only the very bottom of the chocolate-dipped-side touches the baking dish and the undipped side is resting on the ledge. Freeze until firm and serve.

For butterscotch dipped pretzels: Use the same technique as above, but sprinkle with chocolate sprinkles instead of candies. (The butterscotch will be very sweet, so it doesn't need more candy added to it).

A Villain & A Victim: Halloween 2009

2009-11-03T07:39:00.000-08:00

Mr. Luz and I hosted our First Annual K Street Halloween Party this weekend, and we had the absolute best time. Last Halloween was our first big night out in D.C. after we moved here, and it's really amazing how different things are one year later. We've found a fun-loving, supportive gaggle of friends, and it was great to get all of them together to mingle and celebrate Halloween.

Mr. Luz and I spent some time and creative energy on our costumes, so I thought I'd post them here. (NOTE: Mr. Luz has a tendency to be somewhat shocking on Halloween--it takes the party to a whole new level, and I love it. That said, his costume may be a bit....shocking.)

Here's what we were going for:

Poison Ivy from Batman and Lady Gaga (pop singer/spectacle extraordinaire. She's fantastic)

Here's where we ended up...10 hours of costume-making and one trip to Michaels later. My cape was awesome, but also inconvenient in a crowded party

Here's where it gets shocking--Lady Gaga at the Video Music Awards and....
....Mr. Luz at the dance club. The resemblance is uncanny, no? I love this man.

Annual Pop-Culture Reference Straight Ahead

2009-10-29T08:45:00.000-07:00

Yes, I love pop culture....I fell in love in law school because I didn't want to be challenged by non-law school things like music, literature, and TV. And it's just soooo easy and cozy that I've had a hard time getting back into any sort of media with actual educational value. Lucky for you, dear readers, I've avoided making pop culture references on the blog until today. It's Halloween, and in DC that means everything is about dead stuff, bats, politics, and pop culture until November 1st. So I feel justified in saying:

1. Kevin's total dominance on Top Chef reinforces I've been saying all along...never underestimate the power or pork fat.

2. This Halloween is going to be the best yet. I'm going as Poison Ivy from the Batman comic books/movies/animated series. Mr. Luz is going as Lady Gaga at the MTV Video Music Awards, and I'm making a double batch of BBQ pulled pork. All is right with the world.

Daring Bakers: Doubting My Status Over French Macarons

2009-10-27T04:53:00.000-07:00

The 2009 October Daring Bakers’ challenge was brought to us by Ami S. She chose macarons from Claudia Fleming’s The Last Course: The Desserts of Gramercy Tavern as the challenge recipe.

The Daring Baker's challenge this month, French Macarons, caused me to question myself, given the semantics of our fancy lil' baking/blogger group. "Daring"--okay, that one's fairly obvious. Are you daring? Do you want to be daring? I'm in the latter group. It's the second part I'm having a problem with. "Baker." This month's challenge made it all to clear that daring as I may be, I am no baker.

Normally I can fudge it, but these fussy little sugar bombs require about 20 minutes of real work, and (in my non-baker experience) about 5 hours of waiting, cussing, and general crabbiness. Along with patience, I also lack: a kitchen larger than a bathroom; more than one cookie sheet, an oven that cooks at the temperature you set it at. None of this matters when I'm cooking, but it makes all the difference when you're making cookies that are more temperamental than my sister, BaCon Bit, in her teenage years. I'm no baker and these cookies spent 5 hours and 20 minutes reminding me of that fact on one dark and stormy Sunday.

That said, they are freaking adorable. And they are crispy, and chewy, and versatile enough to make in all of your favorite flavor combinations. I chose to do a simple lemon cookie (adding lemon zest I'd dried in the oven to the almond flour when I ground it with my Salvation Army food processor) and a goat cheese buttercream (that I made in my Salvation Army Kitchenaid stand mixer). I'd make batches and batches to share if I could get more than 10 cookies off of the "non-stick" silicon mat I bought for this challenge--which cost as much as the SalVay food processor--without them completely disintegrating. Alas, I am no baker.

An adaptation of Claudia Fleming’s Macaron Recipe

2 ¼ cups (225 g, 8 oz.) Icing/Confectioner's/Powdered Sugar
2 cups (190 g, 6.7 oz.) Almond Flour (ground in your food processor to make your cookies silky)
2 Tbs. (25 g , .88 oz.) Granulated Sugar (I added 1/2 Tbs. since I heard it stabilizes the egg whites)
5 Egg Whites at room temperature (Google "aging egg whites" and use those if possible)

Directions:

1. Preheat the oven to 200°F (93°C). Combine the confectioners’ sugar and almond flour in a medium bowl. If grinding your own nuts, combine nuts and a cup of confectioners’ sugar in the bowl of a food processor and grind until nuts are very fine and powdery.

2. Beat the egg whites in the clean dry bowl of a stand mixer until they hold soft peaks. Slowly add the granulated sugar and beat until the mixture holds stiff peaks.

3. Sift a third of the almond flour mixture into the meringue and fold gently to combine. (40-50 strokes total!! Make your first two or three strokes "fast" but not "hard" to combine the flour). If you are planning on adding zest or other flavorings to the batter, now is the time. Sift in the remaining almond flour in two batches. Be gentle! Don’t overfold, but fully incorporate your ingredients.

4. Spoon the mixture into a pastry bag fitted with a plain half-inch tip. (HATE the pastry bag!!) You can also use a Ziploc bag with a corner cut off. It’s easiest to fill your bag if you stand it up in a tall glass and fold the top down before spooning in the batter.

5. Pipe one-inch-sized (2.5 cm) mounds of batter onto baking sheets lined with nonstick liners or parchment paper. (Pipe as if you were doing a "dollop." Just put the tip close to the cookie sheet and pipe a sphere, don't make a circle and then "fill it in" or your cookies will be all air.)

6. Bake the macaroon for 5 minutes. Remove the pan from the oven and raise the temperature to 375°F (190°C). (This is to dry your macarons so they puff up to create the highly coveted "feet". I have a crappy oven so I just dried them on the counter for 40 min before baking.) Once the oven is up to temperature, put the pans back in the oven and bake for an additional 7 to 8 minutes, or lightly colored.

7. Cool on a rack before filling.

Yield: 4 dozen.

Happiness Is...Bacon Bloody Marys

2009-10-23T17:44:00.000-07:00

Sticky Rice on H Street SE in D.C. will serve you your very own pitcher of bloody marys if you're lucky enough to catch their brunch menu.

And if you ask nicely, they'll throw in 3 pieces of crispy, crunchy bacon that you can eat right away (tempting) OR you can sink them in your gallon of bloody mary so it becomes little slabs of chewy-spicy-tomato-porky-insanity.

NOTE: I grew up in the Midwest where I was a waitress/college student. I spent the past 3 years dealing with law-school-stress and bar-exam-stress in New Orleans, and now I'm a lawyer. In sum, I can drink. This pitcher o' love put me under. Luckily, I enjoyed mine during the H Street Festival, where dancing in the streets was encouraged. Good luck with yours and don't say I didn't warn you.

Happiness is....Zingerman's Bacon Bread!

2009-10-19T06:00:00.000-07:00

I'm willing to speculate that law school, and all of its attendant procrastination and stress eating, made me the food blogger that I am today. (Thanks, Tulane Law...it almost makes up for all 3,456 of the panic attacks you gave me.)

I cooked for friends in law school partly because we were reduced to such a sad existence. My cooking looked amazing when compared to the vending machine options at Weinmann Hall. And when you're terribly miserable, anything given in the spirit of generosity--even an overcooked hamburger--is like a gift from the heavens. People often returned the favor with wine and cookie donations, but no one appreciates my cooking like our good friend, Mr. Jacoby.

During law school, Mr. Jacoby loaded me up with baked goods that he made from fresh and exotic ingredients. I still dream about a loaf of blueberry bread that he brough me--it probably had at least 3 sticks of butter in it, it was so rich! MMmsnorglemmmm. Mr. Jacoby is in Texas now, a mere 1000-something miles from D.C. Even so, he managed to deliver some tasty baked goods recently in the form of Zingerman's Pepper Bacon Farmhouse bread! Zingerman's has a Deli and Bakehouse in Ann Arbor, MI and its full-service bar restaurant, The Roadhouse, has been recognized by the James Beard Foundation. They do a booming "mail order" business, which is how I came to experience the glory that is Zingerman's thanks to Mr. Jacoby. (On my Christmas list, their "Guide to Better Bacon"..it has a bacon fat mayonnaise recipe!) And in my opinion, they make the best bread in the country. What's so special about it?

Short answer: Everything.

The crust is rich and crackling, the inside is dense and chewy. And the black pepper applewood smoked bacon flavor? Aacckkk((09danl;iwer*!!!!! I maybe had it for dinner one night covered in goat cheese. It was so smoky, and salty, and spicy. I mean, its meat bread. How can you go wrong? (FYI, we also had another loaf jam-packed with huge raisins and walnuts, but I ate it before I could take any pictures.) And so, Mr. Jacoby, I'd like to take this opportunity to thank you, for being a wonderful friend and my culinary co-counsel, and especially for sending me meat bread. You are my favorite.

Beer Cheese Soup Recipe

2009-10-16T06:52:00.000-07:00

It's Autumn in D.C., which means I'm thinking about 3 things...Halloween, comfort food, and watching Saints games in NOLA every Sunday with a bucket of Popeye's chicken. (Ok, 4 things--I'm also thinking about how much I hate the onset of winter in D.C., but it's a bit early to start whining about that now.)

And if you're anything like me, this beer cheese soup recipe will easily satisfy your craving for great comfort/football food. You can serve it with sandwiches and chips at your next NFL-related get together because, duh, it's beer and cheese. It also works as a light dinner with some crusty bread or microwavable soft pretzels and a side salad. The malty beer adds some sweetness and depth to the sharp, tangy cheese, and leeks and carrots are just awesome in general.

And unlike alot of other flavorful soups, this one doesn't have to simmer for hours, so go ahead and make a batch between trips to the store to replenish the Halloween candy that keeps mysteriously disappearing.

Beer Cheese Yummy Recipe

2 Medium Leeks (well rinsed, white and pale green parts only) chopped
3 Medium Carrots, chopped
2 Celery Ribs, chopped
2 tsp. chopped Garlic
2 Bay Leaves
1/2 stick (1/4 cup) Unsalted Butter
1/3 cup Flour
2 cups Whole Milk
2 cups Chicken Broth
2 bottles Sam Adams Red Ale or other malty ale
1 Tbs. Worcestershire sauce
1 tsp. Dijon mustard
Black pepper, cayenne pepper, salt to taste
12 oz. extra-sharp Cheddar
Soft Pretzels (optional)

CHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESE!!!!!!!

Melt butter over medium heat in a heavy bottomed soup pot. Cook leeks, carrots, celery, garlic, and bay leaf in butter, stirring occasionally, until vegetables begin to soften.
Reduce heat to low and sprinkle flour over vegetables, then cook, stirring often, for 3 minutes. Add milk, broth, and beer whisking continuously, then simmer, whisking occasionally, 5 minutes but do NOT boil. Stir in Worcestershire sauce, mustard, salt, and pepper.
Remove bay leaf, and carefully blend with either a handheld blender or a counter-top blender until the vegetables are in small pieces and the soup is mostly smooth. Add cheese by handfuls, stirring constantly, and cook until melted, 3 to 4 minutes. Serve hot garnished with sliced green leeks or warm soft pretzels.

St.Louis Good Eats: Acero Restaurant in Maplewood

2009-10-05T01:00:00.000-07:00

Bon appetite magazine's September 2008 feature, The Best Italian Food in America, welcomes readers to the "Italian-American renaissance" by highlighting recipes from restaurants across the U.S. that the editors would include on their Italian-American "fantasy menu."

Bon appetite's fantasy menu celebrates the fresh but sophisticated approach that Italian chefs are taking to invigorate rustic old-world flavors for today's more adventurous diners, and lists St. Louis' Acero Restaurant among the best. If national recognition isn't enough to convince you to try Acero's new old-world cuisine, consider their $25 four course tasting menu and the fact that their talented Executive Chef, Adam Gnau, is also great eye candy. (I'm pretty sure Mama and Papa BaCon would bring me to Acero every time I come home, in hopes that Chef Gnau and I would find true love over a plate of Tuscan Anchovies, if they didn't love Mr. Luz so much.)

Acero is part of the Jim Fiala family of restaurants (see also Liluma and The Crossing) and Fiala keeps Acero's food simple yet stunning with the best ingredients and thoughtful flavor combinations. With every bite, I couldn't help but think "This is exactly how this food, each element of this dish, is supposed to taste." Chefs Fiala and Gnau manage to tease the most flavor out of each component of each dish with just a little heat, oils, acids, and seasoning, and the overall effect as enjoyable as it is surprising.

My antipasti of chicken liver mousse on crostini was rich, and buttery, and the crostini was brioche-like in taste and texture--sweet, and dense. I also tried the bruschetta with caramelized onion, blue cheese, and honey and was surprised by how balanced the dish was given all of the sweeter elements. The blue cheese was perfectly acidic, and the onions were more piquant and creamy than sweet.

I ordered one of the specials for my primi, a ricotta and parmesan gnudi with a simple tomato sauce and guanciale, or cured pork cheek. One of my favorite foods of all time is the swiss chard malfatti at Al Di La in Brooklyn, NY, also a gnudi dish, and I'm always on the hunt for something to satisfy my herb and cheese craving when I can't get to NY. Acero's gnudi did not disappoint. The guanciale added a salty savoriness to an otherwise sweet and delicate dish. It's safe to say that I've found my Midwest malfatti. I also tried Acero's Egg Raviolo--a large, thin ravioli filled with herbs, spinach, and soft cheeses, and topped with a farm fresh egg yolk. The pure opaque richness of the soft-boiled egg yolk essentially served as a sauce for the light, sweet pasta and delicately herbed cheeses. If Acero's Egg Raviolo was my last meal on earth (hopefully paired with a dry aged steak and a SuperTuscan of Glenn Bardgett's choosing), I could certainly die happy.

Between courses, Chef Gnau brought us a few fun and interesting dishes as a little lagniappe to our already amazing meal. (Perhaps he was attempting to wooing me with briny and fried things, Mama BaCon?) First, we had white anchovies with heirloom tomatoes, basil, and lemon. I have recently fallen in love with all things anchovy, I'm addicted to their mild sweet, salty funkiness, and this little taste was a nice combination of anchovy with some bright, fresh Summer flavors.
Next came what Chef Gnau jokingly described as meat doughnuts (Wooohoooo!) The simple presentation of thinly shaved prosciutto, deep fried bread beignets, a ripe and golden olive oil, and biting red lava salt was seriously heavenly and appealed to all of the senses at once.

The parade of riches at Acero continued when my secondi course arrived--seared sea scallops with heirloom beans and oyster mushrooms. Acero may take the prize for the perfectly cooked scallop (though I'll take offers for a challenger)--the outside was so crispy, and evenly caramelized while the inside was perfectly succulent and not overcooked. The heirloom beans and mushrooms added grassy, earthy flavors wholly distinct from, but also complementary to, the scallops.

Like all of Jim Fiala's restaurants, Acero is unassuming and friendly despite its superstar status and the utterly confident talent and innovation that characterizes its kitchen. As if I were in an old friend's kitchen after a long and successful dinner party, I finished my meal at Acero with a glass of port, their simple dessert of vanilla gelato covered with a shot of espresso, and happy, drowsy conversation that drifted off as we each got lost in our thoughts, remembering our favorite parts of our meal. And no, Chef Gnau didn't send out his personal phone number with my tawny port, but there's always next time.

Roast Duck & Smoky Mushroom Vols-au-Vent with Sweet Potato Hash

2009-09-28T01:00:00.000-07:00

The most important question I asked myself this month went something like this: What does one do with 729 layers of butter wrapped in crispy puff pastry? My answer went something like this: Serve it with Bacon. Because sometimes the best answers are also the most obvious.

More precisely, I served my vols-au-vent filled with roasted duck and wild mushrooms with bacon, and I finished that with a little red wine. To make things even more festive, I also made a roasted sweet potato and butternut squash hash with rosemary--really because I was craving some holiday fare and the flavors were a nice light, sweet complement to the earthy richness of the buttery, smokey duck entree.

The best part about these components is that you can serve them so many ways. Next time I'll serve the duck breast with the skin on, and finely shred the rest of the duck and chop the bacon and mushrooms smaller for a more refined, less rustic dinner. And the sweet potato hash is great paired with a gamefish like a meaty swordfish for a simple yet flavorful meal.

Sweet Potato & Butternut Squash Hash w/Rosemary:

1/2 large butternut squash
3 large sweet potatoes
3 Tbs. extra virgin olive oil
2 tsp. kosher salt (sounds like alot, but it keeps the dish savory instead of too sweet)
1 tsp. fresh ground pepper
4 Tbs. fine chopped fresh rosemary
1 Tbs. pumpkin pie spice
2 tsp. ground nutmeg

Preheat the oven to 450 degrees. Using a vegetable peeler, remove the skin from the sweet potatoes and the butternut squash. (It's easiest if you pull towards you on the squash, since it's skin is more like a rind and doesn't peel easily.) Cut them into 1-inch cubes and place them in high-sided baking dish.

Toss the remaining ingredients with the chopped squash and sweet potatoes, and bake on the top rack of the oven, uncovered, for 35 minutes or until the vegetables are easily pierced with a fork and slightly browned.
Roasted Duck & Smoky Mushroom Vols-au-Vent:

4 large puff pastry vols-au-vent
1 4-5 lb. whole duck
3 large garlic cloves
3 sprigs rosemary
2 medium-sized white onions
5 strips of uncooked, smoked bacon
4 cups oyster and sliced cremini mushrooms, washed
2 cups red wine
1 oz cold, unsalted butter
Kosher salt and fresh ground pepper

Gratuitous oyster mushroom closeup starting.........now.
Remove the gizzards, liver, ect. from the duck and rinse inside and out. Pat dry and season the inside of the duck with salt and pepper. Smash the garlic cloves and add them and the rosemary sprigs to the inside of the duck. Place 1/2 of an onion in the opening to "block" it and keep the seasonings in. Tie the duck's legs and wings if necessary.

Prick the duck skin all over with a sharp knife, cutting through the fat but not the meat and season with salt and pepper. Roast the duck in an oven at 375 and according to these directions, or rotisserie the duck for 1 hour. (Thanks Mama and Papa BaCon for my awesome rotisserie!) If you use your rotisserie, your skin will be less crispy, but you'll have an easier go.

When the duck is finished, let it rest for at least 15 minutes before carving.

Place bacon strips in an oven proof saute pan, and render at 500 degrees until bacon is crisp but not burnt. (Approx. 10 minutes). Remove the bacon and crumble when cool.

Add 1 onion, coarse chopped, and the mushrooms to the saute pan, stir to make sure that everything is covered in bacon drippings, and bake at 500 degrees covered for 5 minutes and uncovered for 10. The onion and mushrooms should be slightly browned and cooked through.

Remove the mushrooms and onions, and drain any remaining bacon fat. Add red wine to the saute pan and simmer over medium-low heat, scraping up any browned bits in the bottom of the pan, until the red wine is reduced to 3/4 cup. Only add salt and pepper after the wine has reduced, to ensure that you don't over-season. Add bacon, mushrooms, and onions to the red wine reduction and toss to coat. Serve in vol-au-vent shells with the duck and the sweet potato hash on the side.

729 Layers of Butter: The Daring Bakers make Puff Pastry Vols-au-Vents

2009-09-27T01:00:00.000-07:00

The September 2009 Daring Bakers' challenge was hosted by Steph of A Whisk and a Spoon. She chose the French treat, Vols-au-Vent based on the Puff Pastry recipe by Michel Richard from the cookbook Baking With Julia by Dorie Greenspan.

I loved this challenge, and I'll likely become a puff-pastry-making fool after this. Don't be surprised if you stop by for some Project Runway and a pizza and I bring you a slice in a giant puff pastry. And don't think you can get out of it by simply coming over for drinks. Mr. Luz's martinis can be served in puff pastry vols-au-vent--what do you think I had for dinner last night?

Maybe it was the fact that I took four sticks of butter and beat them with a rolling pin into an inch-thick, 1 lb. slab of creamy fat. Maybe I just like the term "laminated dough." (Laminated documents are kind of sexy. They're all glossy and crisp.) But I think that I really loved this challenge because I created a dish with 729 layers of butter. That's effing crazy, right?!

Before I get to the challenge recipe, I have a few comments and tips for anyone trying to recreate it. First, I used bleached flour and cheapish butter and the results tasted great but weren't as pretty or puffy as they could have been. Next time, I'm getting fancy, fatty butter and unbleached flour so everything comes out golden and crispy. Also, I made square pastries first, and the dough seemed to like the straight cuts better. There was more definition between the layers, BUT I applied 4 strips of dough to the bottom layer to make the puffed walls of the vols-au-vent, and they came out wonky. Next time I'll cut two squares of the same size, and then cut an inner square out of the center of the top layer so the walls are all one piece.

Also, do a little research on puff pastry so you get the directions stated a few different ways. This Julia Child video on making puff pastry is educational and enjoyable, so grab a glass of wine and start your project with a little Julia.

And just to prove that I did not throw my DB challenge on the floor this go round, here's a pic of it, dough-free.

Michel Richard’s Puff Pastry Dough
From: Baking with Julia by Dorie Greenspan

Puff pastry is in the "laminated dough” family, along with Danish dough and croissant dough. A laminated dough consists of a large block of butter, the “beurrage," enclosed in dough, called the “détrempe”. This dough/butter packet is called a “paton,” and is rolled and folded repeatedly to create the crisp, flaky, parallel layers you see when baked. Puff pastry dough contains no yeast in the détrempe, and relies solely aeration to achieve its high rise. The turning process creates hundreds of layers of butter and dough, with air trapped between each one. In the hot oven, water in the dough and the melting butter creates steam, which expands in the trapped air pockets, forcing the pastry to rise.

2 1/2 Cups unbleached all-purpose flour
1 1/4 Cups cake flour
1 Tbsp. salt
1 1/4 Cups ice water
1 lb. very cold unsalted butter
Plus extra flour for dusting work surface

Mixing the Dough:

Check the capacity of your food processor before you start. If it cannot hold the full quantity of ingredients, make the dough into two batches and combine them.

Put the all-purpose flour, cake flour, and salt in the work bowl of a food processor fitted with a metal blade and pulse a couple of times just to mix. Add the water all at once, pulsing until the dough forms a ball on the blade. The dough will feel like Play-Doh.

Remove the dough from the machine, form it into a ball, and slash the top in a tic-tac-toe pattern. Wrap the dough in a damp towel and refrigerate for about 5 minutes.

Place the butter between 2 sheets of plastic wrap and beat it with a rolling pin until it flattens into a square that's about 1" thick. Take care that the butter remains cool and firm: if it has softened or become oily, chill it before continuing.

Incorporating the Butter:

Unwrap the dough and place it on a work surface dusted with all-purpose flour with your rolling pin (preferably a French rolling pin without handles), press on the dough to flatten it and then roll it into a 10" square. Keep the top and bottom of the dough well floured to prevent sticking and lift the dough and move it around frequently. Starting from the center of the square, roll out over each corner to create a thick center pad with "ears," or flaps.
Place the cold butter in the middle of the dough and fold the ears over the butter, stretching them as needed so that they overlap slightly and encase the butter completely. You should now have a package that is 8" square.

To make great puff pastry, it is important to keep the dough cold at all times. If your room is warm, or you find that for no particular reason the butter starts to ooze out of the pastry, cover the dough with plastic wrap and refrigerate it .

Making the Turns:

Gently but firmly press the rolling pin against the top and bottom edges of the square (this will help keep it square). Then, keeping the work surface and the top of the dough well floured to prevent sticking, roll the dough into a rectangle that is three times as long as the square you started with, about 24" (don't worry about the width of the rectangle: if you get the 24", everything else will work itself out.) With this first roll, it is particularly important that the butter be rolled evenly along the length and width of the rectangle; check when you start rolling that the butter is moving along well, and roll a bit harder or more evenly, if necessary, to get a smooth, even dough-butter sandwich (use your arm-strength!).

With a pastry brush, brush off the excess flour from the top of the dough, and fold the rectangle up from the bottom and down from the top in thirds, like a business letter, brushing off the excess flour. You have completed one turn.

Rotate the dough so that the closed fold is to your left, like the spine of a book. Repeat the rolling and folding process, rolling the dough to a length of 24" and then folding it in thirds. This is the second turn.

Chilling the Dough:

If the dough is still cool and no butter is oozing out, you can give the dough another two turns now. If the condition of the dough is iffy, wrap it in plastic wrap and refrigerate it for at least 30 minutes. Each time you refrigerate the dough, mark the number of turns you've completed by indenting the dough with your fingertips. It is best to refrigerate the dough for 30 to 60 minutes between each set of two turns.

The total number of turns needed is six. If you prefer, you can give the dough just four turns now, chill it overnight, and do the last two turns the next day. Puff pastry is extremely flexible in this regard. However, no matter how you arrange your schedule, you should plan to chill the dough for at least an hour before cutting or shaping it.

Steph’s extra tips:
-Many puff pastry recipes use a teaspoon or two of white vinegar or lemon juice, added to the ice water, in the détrempe dough. This adds acidity, which relaxes the gluten in the dough by breaking down the proteins, making rolling easier.
-If you chill your paton longer than the recommended time between turns, the butter can firm up too much. If this seems to be the case, let it sit at room temperature for 5-10 minutes to give it a chance to soften before proceeding to roll. You want the butter to roll evenly, in a continuous layer.
-Roll the puff pastry gently but firmly, and don’t roll your pin over the edges, which will prevent them from rising properly.
-Try to keep “neat” edges and corners during the rolling and turning process, so the layers are properly aligned.
-Brush off excess flour before turning dough and after rolling.

Forming and Baking the Vols-au-Vent

Well-chilled puff pastry dough

Egg wash (1 egg or yolk beaten with a small amount of water)

Your filling of choice

Line a baking sheet with parchment and set aside.

Using a knife or metal bench scraper, divided your chilled puff pastry dough into three equal pieces. Work with one piece of the dough, and leave the rest wrapped and chilled. (See the layers? MMMMmmmmbutter encased dough layers....)

On a lightly floured surface, roll the piece of dough into a rectangle about 1/8 to 1/4-inch thick. Transfer it to the baking sheet and refrigerate for about 10 minutes before proceeding with the cutting.

For larger sized vols-au-vent, fit for a main course or dessert, use a 4” cutter to cut out about 4 circles. Make clean, sharp cuts and try not to twist your cutters (or your sharp knife, for squares) back and forth or drag your knife through the dough. Half of these rounds will be for the bases, and the other half will be for the sides. (Save any scrap by stacking—not wadding up—the pieces…they can be re-rolled and used if you need extra dough. If you do need to re-roll scrap to get enough disks, be sure to use any rounds cut from it for the bases, not the ring-shaped sides.)

Using a 2- to 2.5-inch round cutter, cut centers from half of the rounds to make rings. These rings will become the sides of the vols-au-vent, while the solid disks will be the bottoms.

Dock the solid bottom rounds with a fork (prick them lightly, making sure not to go all the way through the pastry) and lightly brush them with egg wash. Place the rings directly on top of the bottom rounds and very lightly press them to adhere. Brush the top rings lightly with egg wash, trying not to drip any down the sides (which may inhibit rise).

Refrigerate the assembled vols-au-vent on the lined baking sheet while you pre-heat the oven to 400ºF (200ºC). Once the oven is heated, remove the sheet from the refrigerator and place a silicon baking mat (preferred because of its weight) or another sheet of parchment over top of the shells. This will help them rise evenly. Bake the shells until they have risen and begin to brown, about 10-15 minutes depending on their size. Reduce the oven temperature to 350ºF (180ºC), and remove the silicon mat or parchment sheet from the top of the vols-au-vent. If the centers have risen up inside the vols-au-vent, you can gently press them down. Continue baking (with no sheet on top) until the layers are golden, about 15-20 minutes more.

Remove to a rack to cool. Cool to room temperature for cold fillings or to warm for hot fillings.
Fill and serve.

Good Eats St. Louis: Annie Gunn's Restaurant

2009-09-22T07:26:00.000-07:00

No trip to St. Louis, Missouri--my original hometown--is complete without a trip to Annie Gunn's Restaurant.

Annie's promoted sustainable, artisanal, locally-sourced ingredients before such things became de rigueur in fine dining. And to list a few of its many distinctions, Annie's has been recognized as one of the Distinguished Restaurants of North America (DIRONA), and Chef Lou Rook III was a recent semifinalist for the James Beard Award for Best Chef, Midwest. Glenn Bardgett's wine list consistently wins the Wine Spectator "Best Of" Award of Excellence in addition to other prestigious awards, and reads like a bacchanalian, lyrical love poem to some of the best wines in the world. (ie: "Etude 2006 Carneros ~ An old favorite never fails to excite, always a benchmark of Carneros")

But above all, to me, Annie Gunn's means family. Although I only worked at Annie's for 2 years, it's like no time has passed when I go back. I'm always greeted with happy hugs, warm smiles, updates about children and now grandchildren (!), and it is a loving and wonderful homecoming. The most significant and unexpected of these homecomings happened in September, 2005. Just one month after I left Annie's and moved to New Orleans for law school, Hurricane Katrina sent me back home with nothing but my dog, a few law books, and 3 changes of clothes. Annie's took me back with open and friendly arms. Co-workers donated uniforms, shoes, and clothes, and I was immediately back on the schedule. For several months, I was panicked, and grief-stricken for everyone and everything that we lost in the floods after the storm, but I was never alone--my Annie's family made sure of that.

Annie's is an amazing family because the people who work there--many of whom have been there for more than a decade--share a real compassion for one another that can handle any crisis. (Something that I will always be thankful for.)

And Annie's is an amazing restaurant because its staff shares a collective passion for fine dining with its guests day in and day out. Obviously I can't write a real review--it would be like trying to critique Mama BaCon's jambalaya recipe--but here are some photos from my latest trip to Annie's. Like my most recent visit, here's hoping that my Annie's homecomings from now on are merely sweet, and always familiar. And if you, dear reader, get to visit any time soon, I hope you are able to recognize that Annie's is much, much more than just a restaurant. And the maple glazed smoked shrimp are not to be missed.

(If you guys end up reading this Glenn, Lesley, Pappa & Claire, and Chef Lou--I miss you guys all the time. You'll never know how much you mean to me, but maybe this helps? I love you!)

Herb Crusted Missouri Goatsbeard Farm Goat Cheese with Local Arugula, Oil-cured olives, Alici and Local Plum Compote and Lamb Bacon

Daily Lunch Special of Sauteed Gulf Shrimp in an Herb Heirloom Tomato Broth and Crispy Risotto Cakes

Grilled Medallion of Beef Tenderloin and Sauteed Hudson Valley Foie Gras with a Schlafly Pale Ale Tamarind Caramel Glaze and Whipped Yukon Gold Potatoes

(aka "Foie Gras As Big As Yer Head")

St. Louis Good Eats: BBQ Pork Steaks

2009-09-20T01:00:00.000-07:00

Summer's almost over, but it certainly ain't over yet and I have another grilling recipe to prove it. Keeping with tradition here at BaCon, this recipe produces pretty impressive results with relatively little work. (leaving plenty of time for beer drinking and impromptu dance parties, of course. I have my priorities in line.)

My love for the grill actually started one Summer afternoon in South St. Louis, Missouri. I was a recent college grad, and I found myself with some free time, absolutely no cooking skills, (Mama BaCon will tell you that at this point in my life I could "burn water"), and a tiny table-top charcoal camping grill. On this particular day, I skipped the frozen section at the grocery store and instead headed to the more daunting butcher department for some pork steaks. I was craving some St. Louis Summer food, and though I didn't quite pull it off on that day (don't ask), I became mildly obsessed with the smoky, familiar smell of meat on a hot grill, and the pursuit of the perfect grilling recipe.

Now for the facts. If you've never had a BBQ pork steak, well--I'm truly sorry. Pork steaks are also known as blade steak or pork shoulder steak because they come from cutting a Boston Butt, or shoulder roast, into 1 inch steaks. They're typically rimmed with fat and almost like beef brisket in texture--super dense and flavorful--so they're perfect for BBQing. Although they're truly a staple of St. Louis Summers, you can find pork steaks in D.C.. Mama and Papa BaCon drove mine down from St. Louis when I was in NOLA (yes, am spoiled) but you can have the butcher at your grocery store cut some for you if you find yourself without a cross-country delivery service.

Besides fire and smoke, the key component to any good St. Louis style pork steak is either a tasty caramelized crust or a slow simmer thanks to a sweet, spicy tomato based BBQ sauce. I start with Sweet Baby Ray's and doctor it, but feel free to use your favorite from the store or your spice cabinet, so long as it's tangy and tomato based.

St. Louis Style BBQ Pork Steaks:

4 pork steaks, untrimmed and seasoned with salt and pepper
3 cups of your favorite BBQ sauce
3 large cloves of garlic
1 1/2 tsp. cayenne pepper
1 Tbs. dried oregano
1 Tbs. brown sugar
3-4 beers (and more for drinking)

Prepare your charcoal grill or turn your gas grill on medium direct heat. If using charcoal, spread the hot coals in an even thin layer over the bottom of the grill. Grill the seasoned pork steaks over medium direct heat for 7-10 minutes, or till the meat has browned and some of the fat has rendered and turn and cook the other side for another 5-10 minutes. In an older, clean metal baking pan or an aluminum pan with high sides, add the BBQ sauce, garlic, cayenne, brown sugar, and oregano with one beer.

Place the pork steaks in the pan, and add more beer until the pork steaks are 1/2 covered. Tightly cover the pan with foil, and place on the grill. Cover, and simmer for 2-3 hours. Occasionally listen to the pan, and if it's stopped bubbling, add 1 more beer and re-cover to continue cooking.

When the pork steaks are mostly falling off the bone, carefully remove them from the pan and serve.

Vosges Haut-Chocolat's New Bacon Caramel Toffee

2009-09-17T08:34:00.001-07:00

Oh.

Hells.

Yes.

Obelisk Restaurant, D.C., Because I Deserve It

2009-09-16T11:56:00.000-07:00

This past weekend I spent a quiet, lazy morning sipping coffee and puttering around in the cool, sunny air breezing through my open windows, and I felt thankful, and peaceful, and sad all at once. One part of me feels sentimental about the end of Summer, my first year away from New Orleans and in a Real Job, and the recent and abrupt end of a chapter in my personal life that I haven't quite come to terms with yet.

Another part of me--the part that soon put down the coffee cup and spent the next 2 days baking, chopping, and basting--is impatient with all this reflection. I'm ready for the wisdom that comes from learning to be truly alive in a place I don't want to live, and for the confidence that comes from surviving my first year as an attorney in an occasionally-vicious industry. More than that, I'm ready to leave any self-doubt and heartache from the past year behind me.

But I do know that you can't force growth and maturity, no matter how ready you are to accept it. So I'm stuck with my sometimes-peaceful reflection and/or sadness, with occasional outbursts of purposeful joy and acceptance, until it all starts to come naturally again.

In the meantime, I can cook, and eat, and celebrate everything I possibly can, and Mr. Luz and I were able to do that this weekend at Obelisk in Dupont Circle. Formally, we were celebrating a seriously unexpected bonus from work hitting my bank account; informally, we were trying to take some time for ourselves and let the pure enjoyment of a perfectly executed 5-course tasting menu take precedent over all else.

If you get the chance, please go to Obelisk to celebrate something--anything. From Obelisk's crispy sardines and burrata antipastis and fresh, pillowy pasta courses (burrata is a fresh-cream-filled mozzarella from Italy that Obelisk only serves within 48 hours of its creation) to its bold entrees (including a wagyu beef sirloin), creamy complex cheese offerings, and its adventurous dessert combinations (ie: sour plum and caramel cream), you will be well cared for.

When you're at Obelisk, being treated to their warm service and divine ingredients, you're not thinking about your work schedule, or your cable bill. It's a place where you can be completely present in the flavors of your meal and the intimacy of good friends and family, and everyone deserves more of that in their lives.

PhotoCredit: Sklathill's Flickr page

International Bacon Day!

2009-09-09T08:11:00.000-07:00

I'm taking a break from my break to give you some bacony goodness that was too tantalizing to pass up. [Alliteration, yum.]

September 5 was International Bacon Day, and because I'm slow on the uptake, I deem September 5-12 International Bacon Week. In reality, all good things take at least a week to celebrate (you should be around for my birthday) so it's not too much of a stretch. Also, next year I demand a King and Queen of International Bacon Week. I want a pageant, and fanfare, and bacon-adorned regalia. I don't even have to be Queen, but I do have to be a member of the Court so I can get a tiara.***

Did you miss International Bacon Day? Well, you haven't missed Bacon Week, and here are some fun ways others partied on the 5th to inspire your own celebration.

The Royal Bacon Society, mysterious inner circle that they are, hosted a Bacon Day extravaganza in Santa Barbara, CA. As reported by Jennifer Eolin of the New Old Biddy, Bacon Day boasted creative cookies, bacon caramels, a tasty goat-cheese bacon concoction, and bacon strips drowning in a chocolate fountain. Jennifer's post also reviews some of the bacon-flavored novelties scurrilously capitalizing on the bacon meme (click on my Ads! click on my Ads!)

Bacon mints? Eh. I vote for J&D's bacon lip balm. It's just like rubbing smoky bacon all over your face in the name of beauty, and don't act like that doesn't sound awesome. RBS is promising recipes soon, but if I were you I'd just get one of those chocolate fountains, fry up a pound of extra smoky bacon, and have that for dinner.

Wan Life to Live risked life and limb to make a tasty bacon tempura. The recipe is fairly technical for all you chem geeks out there, and the end results looked divine. Not only is this bacon deep-fried, but it's deep fried in a puffy, airy, crispy coating that's perfect for dipping in ranch dressing. And Wan cusses a fair bit on her blog, which I find endearing. Crass bloggers of the world, unite!

And of course, the industry folks over at Theotherwhitemeat.com have dozens of ideas for your International Bacon DayWeek parties. Their favorite? BBQAddict.com's ready-made Bacon Explosion, which may be available soon at your local grocery stores. Just think, the next time you're in the mood for a woven-bacon log filled with sausage and covered with BBQ sauce, you just have to run down to the grocery store and pick one up along with your prescription of Prevalite.

The International Bacon Day blog, which explains that IBD has been celebrated in at least 6 countries and embraces Vegetarians and Non-pork eaters by also recognizing the glory of non-pork bacon substitutes, will have a summary of all the 2009 festivities soon. That means we get to start planning for next year.

****The AntiCraft ladies remind those who wish to make their Pork Princess tiara: "You are going to be working with an enzyme that bonds protein. You are made of protein. Unless you want to glue your lungs together or glue your eyelids to your eyeballs, you absolutely must follow these safety rules."

Regretful Hiatus

2009-08-27T12:39:00.000-07:00

All told this Summer, I've:

Unloaded 2 moving trucks, & packed and unpacked one of those
Entertained approx. 50 house guests total (including 4 overnight guests)
Grilled or braised approx. 70 lbs. of meat
Helped organize 4 work-related celebrations (weddings, birthdays, going-aways)
Planned 2 birthday soirees for people I love dearly
and
Taken 0 non-work-related/non-mandatory "vacations"
Gone to yoga a mere 2 times since June
Kissed Mr. Luz 1/50th of the times I should have

I've had alot of fun, and a few low-blood-sugar induced meltdowns, but it's time for a break.

I'm going home to St. Louis this weekend to spend time with Mama and Papa BaCon and BaCon Bit. While I'm there I'll drink too much beer with friends I've known for half my life, celebrate a Culinary School graduation (sooo proud of you, Nazer!), and visit my second family at Annie Gunn's restaurant and maybe cry a little because I don't see those guys enough. After that, who knows? Sleep, sunshine, and lots of trashy books, if I can help it.

Hopefully you guys are still around when I can stand the sight of my kitchen again, because my little blogging world has come to mean alot to me these past 6 months. And until then, I really will miss you, and eat more cheese!

Missing NOLA Every Day: Mardi Bike and Plum Street Snowballs

2009-08-19T13:52:00.000-07:00

I'm back from Camp Energy Nerd, and now I'm gearing up to host a birthday soiree for the magnificent Liza Jane. Said soiree will require at least 2 lbs. of Ghiardelli chocolate, 5 lbs. of various cheeses, and oodles of champagne, and yes you can come if you dress up and bring her presents.

With all the excitement, I'm on track to miss my semi-annual New Orleans visit. DC crushes my soul, so I promised myself that I would visit NOLA every six months to carry the sights, sounds, and feel of my flipflops on the old, gnarled sidewalk back with me. I can't make it back until February, so until then I will stalk my steamy, swampy lover via Google Images (Google is pretty fantastic for stalking, in general. I highly recommend it.) Right now I'm missing Plum Street, where I used to live, and it's neighborhood snowball shop.

Plum Street Snowballs serves soft, snowy shaved ice doused with dozens of flavored syrups "by the pail," and days where the owners didn't have a softball game, or a bar mitzvah, or something else keeping them from opening up shop, there will be a line around the corner and a crowd of people sitting on the sidewalk, enjoying their snowballs.

Mr. Luz and I heavily relied on Plum Street Snowballs to get us through bar studying, and we'd scrounge for change in the cushions and pay in dimes if we had to. If you went to Plum Street Snowballs on a quieter afternoon, you'd find yourself in a sunny, verdant neighborhood alongside a sleepy "mardi bike," and some lovely, friendly, genuinely happy folks. I really can't wait to go back.
The scene behind this photo was the scene I walked past every day during my last year in NOLA. God I miss those beat up sidewalks.

Photo Credits:
Photo 1--Jason Perlow on eGullet
Photo 2--from Gwen's Flickr account
Photo 3--by Infrogmation of WikiMedia

Jealous?

2009-08-06T13:53:00.000-07:00

Well, dear readers, the time has come for my big "Summer Vacation," where I bid you adieu for several weeks, only to resurface with an obligatory Daring Baker post that includes some discussion about "where has the summer gone, I'm no baker, blah, blah" before I set some more shit on fire and cover it with sauce for you.

I know you are all dying to know where I'm going for vacay, and to that I say: Camp Energy Nerd in Lansing, Michigan!! No, really, it's called Camp NARUC (National Association of Regulatory Utility Commissioners), which directly translates into "Energy Nerd."

From their brochure, Camp NARUC:

Creates a unique opportunity for total immersion in modern regulatory theory, institutions, and processes.

AND

Provides an opportunity to learn from highly skilled experts representing various disciplines and backgrounds.

Eeep! So excited. Because I love all that geeky stuff, but I also love...

Concerts on the quad at Michigan State University.... "Highly skilled experts" in camp-casual apparel (camp dress code) "totally immersing" themselves in the hula, and...Goodie bags! I've been needing some new pens and a cool canvas tote bag.... You so wish you were me.

"I Always Feel Like Somebody's Waaatching Meeee"

2009-08-04T13:54:00.000-07:00

So I added a new widget today, and I now have a crazy obsession with watching it tick by. I'm using Wowzio's Live Activity Feed on my sidebar and....it's a little scary.

I guess on a good day I get 1 reader a minute here at BaCon, but before I saw that little ticker bump up and announce that someone from the Philippines has arrived, then someone from Vermont, then...well, it was just a number. Now you're all people.

People who are professionally trained in all of this. (Ok, but Emeril, I mean it. Change your damned menus!) People who do things like judge my overuse of cliches and my laziness when it comes to adding the proper accent mark to words like "cliche." People who hate the Bacon Meme (you just wait till I make my Bacon Burlesque outfit-- top hat, corset, ect.--and Bacon jumps the shark once and for all).

Whimper.

Celebrate Someone Special with a Hawaiian Luau Dinner

2009-08-03T08:13:00.000-07:00

Aloha from sunny Washington D.C.! That's me, on the right. Aren't I handsome? Of course there's no way that could be me, mainly because if I'm going to the trouble of matching a hat to my outfit, it would be far more fantastic than than the plain thing this guy is wearing.

But I digress. Tis' time for the First Annual Mr. Luz Birthday Extravaganza post. This post is dedicated to the one and only Party Momster. She's a Birthday-party-aholic, and you can check out her blog here. Party Momster says "I just love the permission a Birthday gives you to escape the everyday and do things you wouldn't normally do. And just be over-the-top in making someone feel special."

Well, Party Momster, Mr. Luz and I agree with you and applaud your dedication to the under appreciated art of partying. Here's to you.

Mookalakaheeki. Come on, you wanna lei me. Pass the poi, Mahalo. A Luau Menu in 4 Parts

This menu should serve 8-10 for dinner, and you can easily convert everything into appetizers. (get some Hawaiian buns and make smoked pork & pineapple salsa sandwiches, cut the ribs into small portions, and spoon the potato salad onto a lettuce wrapper pupu platter-styles.)

Char Sui Ribs: (for 6 lbs. of ribs)
This recipe was relatively easy, because the Asian-inspired ingredients added a richness to the ribs even though I didn't brown them before braising. They were sweet and mellow, and so tender that they weren't really ribs so much as piles of pork with some random bones sitting around. (Oops!) The glaze adds flavor without mess, so don't skip that part.

I think it's typical for Hawaiians to bake rather than braise these puppies, but I'm not experienced with that technique. Instead, I went with a tried and true approach and was rewarded with luscious pork ribs and a lovely soy-roasted garlic-sesame oil perfume throughout the house as the guests arrived.

2 Slabs of Baby Back Ribs (6 lbs.)
1/2 Cup Light Brown Sugar
2 Tbs. Vanilla Extract
1 Cup Hoisin Sauce
4 Tbs. Sesame Oil
4 Tbs. sliced Garlic
4 Tbs. sliced Ginger
4 Tbs. Soy Sauce (I used 2 Tbs. each of regular and low-sodium)

Trim excess fat from the ribs, and remove the tendon from the back of the ribs if you prefer. Place the ribs in a large baking dish with the meaty side facing down.

Mix the rest of the ingredients in a large bowl and pour over the ribs in the roasting pan. Add enough water to the pan so that the ribs are covered ½ way. Cover tightly with foil and bake at 350 degrees for 2.5 hours.

After 2.5 hours, check on the ribs. If they are tender, remove the ribs to a large dish and pour 4 cups of the braising liquid into a sauce pan.

Skim the fat off of the braising liquid and boil until caramelized and reduced to 2 cups. Brush the glaze over the ribs, and if desired, bake at 450 degrees for 5 minutes, or until the glaze has set on the ribs. Cut into the desired size, and serve.

Smoked Island Pork Tenderloin:
Maybe I don't have room in my "yard" to bury an entire pig with some coals and ti leaves, but I do know how to marinade and smoke stuff. Hence the inspiration for this smoked pork recipe. The pork was succulent from its milky marinade, and our guests commented that the coconut flavor was subtle, and yummy.

3 lb. Pork Tenderloin
1 can Coconut Milk (approx. 2 cups)
3 Tbs. Soy Sauce
1 Tbs. Lime Juice
1 cup Pineapple Juice
2 Tbs. chopped Garlic
3 Tbs. chopped Ginger
2 Tbs. Asian 5-Spice
Salt and Pepper

Trim the excess fat and tendon off of the pork tenderloin. Add the remaining ingredients to a blender and blend until the garlic and ginger are minced. Place the tenderloin in a non-metal bowl, and pour the marinade over the top. Cover and refrigerate for 8 hours. If the marinade does not cover the pork, turn it halfway through.

Prepare the grill for smoking. Remove the pork from the marinade, and season liberally with 5-spice, salt, and pepper. Place the pork on the center of the grill, over indirect heat and the drip pan, and smoke for 40 minutes. You can turn and baste with any reserved marinade after 30 minutes, but PLEEZE keep the grill closed otherwise. The pork should be medium after 40 minutes, but smoke for an additional 20 if you want it to be well done.

Remove the pork from the grill, let it rest for 10 minutes, and serve with pineapple salsa (see below).

Kimchi Potato Salad:
This is a recipe for an easy, crowd-pleasing side dish with some interesting and unique element and a light, smoky taste. Hawaiians typically serve poi (paste from taro roots) and kimchi (vinegary, pickled cabbage)at luaus, and I struggled with how to make these elements fit with the BBQ theme.

In the end, I added wilted cabbage and vinegar to an Asian-inspired potato salad, and would have added boiled, cubed taro root if it was available. If you do use taro, be careful and do some research. There are toxins in the skin and the flesh, so take extra precautions when skinning and cooking this starchy, sweet root vegetable.

6 slices of Smoked Bacon
1 ½ Cup sliced Purple Cabbage
5 lbs. of Yukon Gold Potatoes, skinned, boiled, and cubed
2 Cups Mayonnaise
2 Tbs. Soy Sauce
1 Tbs. Sesame Oil
1 Tbs. Dijon Mustard
1 Tbs. Rice Wine Vinegar
1 Cup chopped Green Onion
½ Cup chopped Cilantro
4 dashes Hot Sauce
Salt & Pepper to taste

Cook the bacon in a frying pan over medium heat until crispy and coarse chop when cooled. Wilt the cabbage in the bacon fat and drain on paper towels.

Place the cooked potatoes in a large bowl. Add the bacon and cabbage while still warm, if possible. Mix the remaining ingredients in a small bowl, and pour over the potato mixture. Toss, chill, and serve.

Pineapple Salsa:
Fresh pineapple is now my favorite thing ever. That should say it all.

2 Cups fresh Pineapple, chopped (reserve juices)
½ Cup chopped Cilantro
1 Jalapeno, finely chopped
1 Cup chopped Sweet Onion
1 Red Bell Pepper, finely chopped
4 Tbs. chopped Basil
2 Tbs. chopped mint
4 Tbs. Lime Juice
4 dashes Hot Sauce
Salt & Pepper to taste

Place the pineapple and any juices released from chopping in a non-metal bowl. Add the remaining ingredients, and stir. Let the salsa sit in the fridge for 1 hour to let the flavors blend. Serve well-chilled with taro chips and/or on the smoked pork tenderloin.

Luau Love: Coconut Layer Cake Recipe

2009-08-02T15:46:00.000-07:00

When Mr. Luz and I were planning the menu for his birthday party, our criteria ended up as follows:

1. Fire & meat, but also crisp, clean summer flavors.
3. Unique dishes that are more exotic than your typical BBQ fare.
4. Mass quantities of boozy goodness can be incorporated into the menu.
5. Kiddie pool.

I quickly made the smoked pork, pineapple, and rum connection and we ended up with a Hawaiian Luau theme. I like to think that it was the food (rather than the cooler full of rum punch) that so intoxicated our guests that we were inspired to barhop in full luau gear after dinner. **At this time I'd like to give a shoutout to H street watering hole, The Pug, and the bartender who loaded the jukebox with the Beach Boys in our honor.***

I planned on making traditional Hawaiian foods, but I was limited by missing ingredients, budget, and my desire to cater to the tastes of our 16 guests. Instead, I got creative and made some yummy, Hawaiian-inspired dishes in my own slow-simmered style, and I think we ended up with an unconventional menu that was smoky, Summery, boozy, and....kiddie pool friendly?

For Mr. Luz's birthday cake, I modified a store bought white cake mix to make an easy sponge cake, then I layered it with with homemade Haupia (how-pee-uh) pudding but cheated again with a Cool Whip topping. It was an elegant, tropical, light little cake--just sweet enough because the richer cake and pudding is paired with an airy Cool Whip "icing."

Maybe it'll help you reconcile with the store bought cake mix to know that I slow-cooked 16 lbs. of pork and made potato salad & pineapple salsa for 20 while I was baking this first-ever birthday cake?

NOTE: The pudding layer didn't add a distinct icing layer, as much as it created a moist texture and a coconut-infused sponge cake. If you prefer to have a distinct layer between your cakes, I would slice each layer hoagie-bun style, and use the pudding to put the two pieces back together before assembling the entire cake with a Cool Whip layer in between.

Hawaiian Layer Cake with Haupia Coconut Pudding (modified from Hawaiiforvisitors.com)

Layer Cake: (make 2)
1 box White Cake Mix
1/3 Cup Pineapple Juice
1/3 Cup Water
2 egg whites

Haupia Filling:
2 Cups Coconut Milk
1/2 Cup Sugar
1/4 tsp Salt
3 Tbsp Cornstarch
1/2 Cup Water
1 tsp Vanilla

Topping:
2 Cups Cool Whip topping or a stiff gelatin-based whipped topping recipe
1 Cup Toasted Coconut

Cake Instructions:

Add the cake ingredients to box of cake mix. Beat for 2 minutes, and pour into a greased an 9 inch round cake pan. Bake according to the directions on the cake box. Cool cake.

Haupia Filling Instructions:

Over low heat, heat coconut milk in a sauce pan. Do not boil. In a small bowl, add the water to the corn starch, sugar, and salt. Stir into hot coconut milk and cook, stirring constantly, until thick and pudding-like. Stir in vanilla, and cool in the fridge for at least 3 hours.

Assembling the Cake:

Spread chilled haupia pudding on the bottom (flatest) layer of the cake, reserving 1/2 cup of the pudding. Top with the top layer, and spread Cool Whip on the top layer. If you have the patience, carefully spread the Cool Whip over the bottom layer, being careful not to streak the Cool Whip with the pudding. Otherwise, spread the bottom layer with the remaining haupia pudding, letting some pudding pool around the bottom of the cake. Top with toasted coconut, and refrigerate until 1 hour before serving.

MmmmmmBoozy Paintcan

2009-07-27T09:16:00.000-07:00

Perhaps you have gotten the idea that Mama and Papa BaCon are the sort of folks who have their priorities in order (slow cooker ribs and chocolate cake in a mug, anyone?).

I could tell stories about mis padres that would make your eyes cross with jealousy, but rather than do that, I'll simply share the wonderful craziness that is my family.

I give you, The Paintcan. The Paintcan came into our lives thanks to the generosity of one bearded, wild-haired "neighbor" on a camping trip long ago and far away. After a long day of shouting between campsites about bugs, matches, and fishing lures, he made his way over to our site and offered my dad....a paintcan. Filled with booze.

From that moment on, The Paintcan has been solidified in the family's lore. We make it at every BBQ and on most camping trips as a nod to its originator, Mr. WildhairedBeardGuy. BaCon Bit, aka the little sister who is too cool to read my blog, even personalized a paintcan for Papa BaCon with handles for easy shaking and sipping. It's chilly, and refreshing, and just boozy enough--though I wouldn't drink a whole one yourself, or, as Papa BaCon knows from personal experience, you're liable to end up with a trash can on your head.

The Paintcan

Take 1 clean gallon paintcan, available from your friendly Paint store. Fill 3/4 way with ice.

Add:

1/2 can Frozen lemonade
1/2 can Frozen limeade
1/2 bottle of your favorite Vodka (WOOT!)

Fill the remainder of paintcan with Sprite

Gently tap the lid on TIGHT.
Wrap the can in a towel and shake vigorously until ice forms on the sides. (The towel will freeze to the can, and then you'll know it's ready.) Put the towel over the lid and use a paintcan opener to release the lid (popping with a loud fizz).

Pour and enjoy.

Hello Lovah: BBQ Pulled Pork Recipe

2009-07-20T03:13:00.000-07:00

"LizaJane: You really should patent that pulled pork recipe, tis' heavenly.

Me: The secret weapon being pork fat, that would make for an interesting patent application."

So, now you know my secret. I'm a firm believer in the power of pork fat. After you try this recipe, you'll understand.

This pulled pork recipe is part Carolina BBQ, part St. Louis BBQ--meaning, it's tangy from a good dose of cider vinegar, with some spicy, sweet tomato-based BBQ sauce just for fun. I serve it on a toasted bun, topped with creamy coleslaw, so that the whole experience is one of toasted, creamy, fresh, tangy, spicy, sweet pork fat.

BBQ Pulled Pork:

Braised Pork:
5 lb. pork butt or pork shoulder roast
Salt and Pepper
1 tablespoon peanut oil, or another oil with a high smoke point
2 cups cider vinegar
1/2 cup water
1 Onion, thick sliced
Salt and Pepper

BBQ Sauce:
1/2 cup ketchup
2 Tbs. apple butter
2 Tbs. Dijon mustard
1 Tbs. Worcestershire sauce
1 Tbs. hot sauce
1/2 tsp. granulated garlic
Salt, Pepper to taste

1. Preheat oven to 325 degrees. Trim any sinew off of the pork. but leave the layer of fat on the top. (If the fat is egregious--and you'll know when it's egregious--you can shave some of it off.)

2. Heat oil in a dutch oven over medium-high heat. Rinse and pat the pork dry, and season with salt and pepper immediately before browning. Sear pork on each side until well browned. Remove from the heat. Place pork skin/fat side up in the dutch oven, and add the cider vinegar, water, and onion.
3. Cover and bake for for 3-4 hours, turning the pork once halfway through. (The pot is hot! Ouch!) Once the pork is tender and shreds easily, remove the meat and braised onions from the dutch oven and chop or shred into large pieces, trimming the large pieces of fat that did not render. Reserve 1 cup of the vinegar/braising juices (skimming the liquid if necessary) and place the meat back in the dutch oven.

4. Place the dutch oven on the stove on medium-low. Add the vinegar and the sauce ingredients to the pork and bring to a simmer. Reduce heat to low, cover, and cook JUST until the pork breaks down a little further. Serve on toasted buns and topped with creamy coleslaw or raw, thin sliced white onions.

Bar Exam Gazpacho Recipe

2009-07-17T03:04:00.000-07:00

Dear readers, I would like you to meet Gazpacho, one of my tomato plants. He's a little quiet, but he'll grow on you. (AhahahahaHAHAHA!) He lives in my backyard with Mojito and Margherita I and II. One day, I shall eat him.

In an effort to make sure he meets a noble end, I tried the gazpacho recipe that I perfected last summer, while I was hiding from the New York State Bar Exam. The gazpacho was just as tangy, refreshing as I remembered, and I didn't suffer any post-traumatic-stress-disorder flashbacks of Bar Exam studying while I enjoyed it, which is a huge bonus.

(See, everyone who's studying for the Bar right now? I made it out okay. Also, all the Bar-Prep courses are designed to scare the bejesus out of you. The real thing will be easier. I promise.)

Sure I passed the Bar Exam, but I like to think that my real accomplishment last summer was eating at least 25 incarnations of gazpacho from May thru August, and still wanting a big bowl of it (with extra basil, sour cream, and grilled cheese bread, thank you) today.

Gazpacho (Cold Tomato Soup) with Cucumbers, Garlic, and Balsamic

6 larger tomatoes, peeled, seeded, and coarsely chopped [See note below]
1 purple onion, chopped
1 cucumber, peeled, seeded, coarsely chopped
1 bell pepper, seeded and coarsely chopped
1 stalk celery, chopped
2 jalapenos, seeded and finely chopped
10 leaves basil, chopped
2 cloves garlic, minced
1/4 cup of balsamic vinegar
1/8 cup of water
1/8 cup olive oil
Juice of 1/2 of a lemon
1/8 cup Worcestershire sauce
Salt and Pepper to taste [black pepper, white pepper, cayenne—use your favorite]

Add all the ingredients to a large non-metal bowl, and stir to incorporate all of the different vegetables. Put 1/3 of the mixture in a blender/food processor and blend until slightly liquid, then move to a 2nd non-metal bowl (or large air-tight container) Continue with the remaining portions, blending less each time--the final blended batch should be a chunkier puree. Cover and refrigerate overnight, so the flavors can blend. Serve with your favorite garnishes and some hot sauce.
Peeling & Seeding tomatoes:

Bring a large pot of water (2/3 full) to a boil. Add tomatoes 3 at a time, and boil for 30 seconds. Remove tomatoes, and cool. Pierce tomato skins with a sharp knife, or score the tops with an X and the skins should come off easily. Cut the top off the tomato, and using your thumbs, gently squeeze the seeds out of the seed pockets.[This is the grossest, messiest part, but it’s worth it]

Impromptu Dinner Party By Candlelight...

2009-07-14T08:32:00.000-07:00

Last night Mr. Luz, Foxy, and I received an unexpected gift, thanks to our electric utility and maybe an overzealous power-tool-operator up on H Street.

Around 4pm, our electricity went out for no apparent reason, and it was out for blocks and blocks. We'd invited some of Mr. Luz's family friends over for drinks, but it wasn't a problem. Who wouldn't love an opportunity to drink prosecco by candlelight on a random Monday evening?

Around 8pm, we still didn't have power. Mr. Luz started thinking about the rapidly melting homemade strawberry ice cream in our freezer, and our new neighbors became concerned about the halibut that they brought back from a fishing trip in Alaska. (Similarly, I was concerned about all the beer that was growing warm in our fridge, and busied myself with consuming it all before it reached room temperature...) Clearly, we had to feast, lest everything go to waste.

I set off to light a trail of candles leading to the bathroom and pull out a few more wine glasses, while Mr. Luz gathered the neighbors on either side of us for an impromptu potluck. In the end, we dined on mismatched dishes, by the light of the Weber grill and tiki torches. Our patio tables were covered with rich slices of Saint-Andre triple creme cheese and crusty french bread; the freshest grilled halibut I've ever tasted, with its own homemade tartar sauce; huge ears of grilled sweet corn; garlicky gazpacho soup;and various and sundry other leftovers from this weekend's cooking marathon.

Late into the night, Mr. Luz passed out coffee mugs filled with softened strawberry ice-cream to our 6 wonderful guests. And after we'd finished dessert, the lights came back on and our peaceful, lazy spell was broken. Everyone was a little sad as they went back to their homes to reset the alarm clocks, adjust the A/C, and settle into bed. As much as I appreciate modern conveniences, it's also nice to turn off all of the electronics, shut down the air-conditioning units, and spend some time outdoors--just enjoying the stillness and connecting with the people in our lives. Maybe I'll trip a circuit breaker or two in August (after Mr. Luz makes more ice cream) just for fun.

NOTE: I did not take the photo shown above, but rather I found it on Google Images and have been unable to find the source of it. If you know the source, please comment below so I can give credit to the photographer. Thanks!

Grilled Tandoori Chicken with Spicy Mint Chutney & Grilled Curry Cauliflower

2009-07-12T15:01:00.000-07:00

Oh dear Lord, it feels good to be back. I cooked like a fiend this weekend, and I now have a fridge full of tasty leftovers and a large quantity of wine that was somehow overlooked at this weekend's dinner party. (Maybe it was all the cosmopolitans and mojitos that Mr. Luz was mixing?)

Speaking of fiending, I've picked up a new and terrible addiction to Indian food, which I attribute to all the take-out that we ate during the move. It's terrible because it's July, and as much as I love spicy, stewed meats, they just aren't ideal in the stifling heat.

So in order to get my weekly fix of garlic/ginger/yogurt/cinnamon/cardamom/ect., I decided to add some decidedly summer elements to my traditional tandoori chicken recipe and brighten it up. I grilled some marinated chicken on my Weber charcoal grill, and then added a spicy, bright mint chutney that was wonderfully summery. I also made some curry-rubbed grilled cauliflower as an experiment, and it was very tasty. I normally don't like cauliflower, but I thought I'd give it another chance. (Pimentos, don't get any ideas. I'll always hate you.) The grilling kept the cauliflower crispy, but sweetened it and brought out some of the subtle earthy flavors in the fibrous vegetable. The curry powder also enhanced the cauliflower's earthy flavor, and gave it a pretty caramel/yellow color at the same time.

NOTE: To make this recipe, I bought organic bone-in chicken pieces, and against my better judgment I cut slits in the meat so the marinade could sink in. Then I cried as all the juices ran out of my chicken as it cooked. Next time I'll either get use small chicken breasts (I don't think the marinade absorbed into the dark meat as well) or I'll reserve some of the yogurt mixture, and baste the chicken with it as it cooks.

Tandoori Chicken

2-4 lbs. chicken
1 cup plain yogurt
1/3 cup lemon juice
1 Tbs. peeled and finely chopped fresh ginger
1 Tbs. finely chopped garlic
2 tsp. coriander
2 tsp. ground cumin
3 tsp. garam masala
2 tsp. salt
1 tsp. cayenne

Remove the skin from chicken and place the chicken in a non-reactive bowl. Add the remaining ingredients to the chicken and mix well. Cover and marinate in the refrigerator overnight. (If you plan to baste the chicken, mix the marinate in a separate bowl and reserve a small portion of it before adding the rest to the chicken.)

To cook, place the chicken over direct, medium-high heat and cover. Turn the chicken after the meat has browned and until the meat is cooked through. (Baste the cooked parts with marinade, turning and covering one more time to caramelize the marinade before serving). Remove from heat, and let the chicken rest for 10 minutes before serving.

Mint Chutney

1 1/2 cup mint leaves
1/2 cup cilantro leaves
1 chile, chopped (choose for spice--poblano or jalapeno for alot of heat, anaheim if you prefer a mild chutney)
1/4 coarse chopped onion
pinch cumin
2 Tbs. lemon juice
2 tsp. white or rice vinegar
dash sugar
3 Tbs. plain yogurt

Add all the ingredients to a blender, and puree. Refrigerate for 30 minutes, and serve on top or on the side of the tandoori chicken

Grilled Curry-spiced Cauliflower

2 large heads cauliflower (for 6-8 servings)
4 Tbs. olive oil
2 Tbs. curry powder
Salt, Pepper to taste

Remove the leaves and 2 inches of stem on the cauliflower. Rub florets with 3 Tbs. oil. Cut into wedges, keeping the main stem intact but so that each serving has two flat sides that will sit on the grill. Rub cut stems with remaining 1 Tbs. of olive oil. Sprinkle curry powder on florets.

Place on the grill over indirect, medium high-heat and cover. After 5 minutes, turn to put the other cut side on the grill. The cauliflower is done when it is flexible but not too soft, and golden brown.

Withdrawal Can Be Tasty!

2009-07-11T05:38:00.000-07:00

Maybe you've noticed, but I haven't done alot of cooking lately. I have, however, mooched food off of neighbors, had nothing but wine and pretzels for dinner (not recommended), and spent the entire deposit refund from our old apartment on Vietnamese and Indian take-out.

But the time has come for me to get my ass back in the kitchen and cook/eat off some of my residual stress. Mr. Luz sat me down with a notepad and a few of my favorite cookbooks, and asked me "What are we cooking this week?" Here's what followed...

Me: I want to make....

1. BBQ Pulled Pork with a spicy, Carolina-style BBQ sauce, coleslaw, and corn-on-the-cob with Tabasco butter
2. A bucket of traditional tomato Gazpacho soup
3. My first attempt at Ceviche
4. A big, ole Gooey Butter Cake (a St. Louis favorite made with yellow cake, butter, cream cheese, and powdered sugar)
5. Greek Turkey Burgers
6. Homemade Margherita Pizza
7. Grilled Tandoori Chicken with grilled cauliflower and cucumber salad & mint chutney
8. BBQ Pork Steaks (another St. Louis summer favorite, pork butt sliced into T-bones, then grilled and braised in BBQ sauce)
9. Sesame Noodle Salad w/ sugar snap peas, carrots, red bell peppers
10. Grilled Shrimp & Veggie Pasta
11. Bacon
12. Homemade Strawberry Ice cream
13. Panzanella (Bread & Tomato) Salad with herb oil, heirloom tomatoes, and shaved parmesan cheese

Clearly, I've missed you guys.

New Home, At Last

2009-07-10T10:29:00.000-07:00

Halo and Happy July!

Mr. Luz and I are mostly settled in our new apartment (an adorable row house 2 blocks from my work, our yoga place, and Mr. Luz's favorite Ethiopian coffee shop).

Papaya Blue once predicted that I would begin to appreciate D.C. when I recognize that some of things I love about New Orleans are also here in my new home, and I know she's right. (Hear that, Papaya?) Our new apartment and our new surroundings definitely remind me of the Good Life in the Big Easy, and I'm finally happy to be right where I am. We've managed to find an apartment and a neighborhood that is intimate, and cozy. Sometimes it feels like the sun shines brighter and the breeze seems sweeter on our little street. And though I find that so much of this city is superficial and all about undercutting something to get the competitive edge, the businesses and the people in our area strive for substance --we can find a dedicated yoga instructor, a sincere and passionate artist, or a dinner that's worth far more than the menu price right around the corner and on any given day.

And on the nights when I can sit out on my front patio and talk to one of our warm and wonderful neighbors as the lightening bugs float past, just enjoying the easy pace of the evening and the company of friends, I feel like I'm home.

Daring Baker's June Challenge: Frangipane, Darling Frangipane, Thank You for All the Joy and Pain

2009-06-27T06:00:00.000-07:00

Woohoo! It's the 27th, which means two things. First, we've finally started moving things to our new apartment. (I'm soo sick of boxes, and Mr. Clean Magic Erasers, and Craigslist--probably because the control freak in me started packing two weeks ago to move approx. 2.3 miles.) It also means it's time for another Daring Bakers Challenge!

This month's challenge was to make a Bakewell Tart--er--Pudding. As far as I can tell from the DB forums, there are many variations of the Bakewell Tart, but this precise recipe suits me just fine.

It's made with a sweet shortbread crust, a jam or curd, and then a frangipane pastry cream baked into a cake...er...pudding. I love, love, love frangipane. It reminds me of eating almond croissants in Mr. Luz's tiny apartment in Paris and the first time I really knew he loved me. (Say it with me now....awwwww! But seriously, I earned it! It took a year and a half!) Until this challenge, I only knew frangipane as a sweet, grainy almond filling for various pastries. Apparently it's not only tasty, but versatile, as it bakes up into a subtle, spongy (or squidgy, according to the recipe) cake that is given center stage in a Bakewell Tart.

We were given a little leeway on the jam, and I wanted to use a dark, tart and earthy fruit to offset the sweet, floral almond flavors so I made a blackberry & elderberry pan jam. From there, the preparation and assembly was relatively easy for such an elegant little dessert/breakfast--and I didn't even throw any part of the recipe on the floor for this challenge!

I did have some trouble with the conversions, though I think I just ended up with a higher butter-to-flour ratio, and who can complain about that? And the lack of air conditioning in my apartment made it rather difficult to handle my "more butter than is feasible" shortbread dough, because it wanted to melt right onto my counter every time I tried to roll it out, but I fixed that by throwing small portions in the freezer and then pressing them into chilled tartlette pans rather than rolling and cutting everything out.

And take my advice...it gets a little gross, but grating the butter into the flour is pure genius. I will never want for a pastry cutter again.

Without further ado....

The June Daring Bakers' challenge was hosted by Jasmine of Confessions of a Cardamom Addict and Annemarie of Ambrosia and Nectar. They chose a Traditional (UK) Bakewell Tart... er... pudding that was inspired by a rich baking history dating back to the 1800's in England.

Makes one 9 inch tart, or three 3 inch tartlettes

One quantity sweet shortcrust pastry (recipe follows)
Bench flour
250ml (1cup (8 US fl. oz)) jam or curd, warmed for spreadability
One quantity frangipane (recipe follows)
One handful blanched, flaked almonds

Assembling the tart

Place the chilled dough disc on a lightly floured surface. If it's overly cold, you will need to let it become acclimatised for about 15 minutes before you roll it out. Flour the rolling pin and roll the pastry to 5mm (1/4”) thickness, by rolling in one direction only (start from the centre and roll away from you), and turning the disc a quarter turn after each roll. When the pastry is to the desired size and thickness, transfer it to the tart pan, press in and trim the excess dough. Patch any holes, fissures or tears with trimmed bits. Chill in the freezer for 15 minutes.

Preheat oven to 200C/400F.

Remove shell from freezer, spread as even a layer as you can of jam onto the pastry base. Top with frangipane, spreading to cover the entire surface of the tart. Smooth the top and pop into the oven for 30 minutes. Five minutes before the tart is done, the top will be poofy and brownish. Remove from oven and strew flaked almonds on top and return to the heat for the last five minutes of baking.

The finished tart will have a golden crust and the frangipane will be tanned, poofy and a bit spongy-looking. Remove from the oven and cool on the counter. Serve warm, with crème fraîche, whipped cream or custard sauce if you wish.

When you slice into the tart, the almond paste will be firm, but slightly squidgy and the crust should be crisp but not tough.

Sweet shortcrust pastry

225g (8oz) all purpose flour
30g (1oz) sugar
2.5ml (½ tsp) salt
110g (4oz) unsalted butter, cold (frozen is better)
2 egg yolks
2.5ml (½ tsp) almond extract (I, E.Lee, used orange extract for FANTASTIC results)
15-30ml (1-2 Tbsp) cold water

Sift together flour, sugar and salt. Grate butter into the flour mixture, using the large hole-side of a box grater. Using your finger tips only, and working very quickly, rub the fat into the flour until the mixture resembles bread crumbs. Set aside.

Lightly beat the egg yolks with the almond/orange extract and quickly mix into the flour mixture. Keep mixing while dribbling in the water, only adding enough to form a cohesive and slightly sticky dough.

Form the dough into a disc, wrap in cling and refrigerate for at least 30 minutes

Frangipane

125g (4.5oz) unsalted butter, softened
125g (4.5oz) icing sugar
3 eggs
2.5ml (½ tsp) almond extract
125g (4.5oz) ground almonds
30g (1oz) all purpose flour

Cream butter and sugar together for about a minute or until the mixture is primrose in colour and very fluffy. Scrape down the side of the bowl and add the eggs, one at a time, beating well after each addition.

The batter may appear to curdle. In the words of Douglas Adams: Don’t panic. Really. It’ll be fine. After all three are in, pour in the almond extract and mix for about another 30 seconds and scrape down the sides again. With the beaters on, spoon in the ground nuts and the flour. Mix well. The mixture will be soft, keep its slightly curdled look (mostly from the almonds) and retain its pallid yellow colour.

Is Food-Porn Overtaking Porn-porn As Our New Favorite Pastime?

2009-06-25T08:28:00.000-07:00

Apparently "sex" is the theme of the week here at BaConc (I just made that up! Coffee on an empty belly is wheee!!!!). I suppose it's only natural--food and sex go hand in hand. Both are essential for the continued existence of mankind; good food and good sex require you to be present, and focused on all your senses to full appreciate the experience; and both involve open flame and a hearty dose of bacon fat in our household.

Mal, over at the hilarious SWTCTW, sent me a link to this Daily Beast post today. Despite what PurAsia has to say about how cooking has made its way into the annals of "The Art of Scammin' On Chicks" (everyone knows that frozen curry products magically dissolve clothing upon ingestion), Gael Green laments the fall of the "Rock Star" chef, and worries that cooking now takes up valuable...sexing...time in our busy lives.

So now we have our continuum--on one end, cooking is largely a form of foreplay (and to that I say, be careful with those eggshells) and on the other end, cooking is a libido-busting pastime where we are all too busy blogging, and tweeting, and obsessing over herbs to focus on the dirty, dirty. And that sounds an awful lot like....life. Most people are passionate about something, and intense focus and emotion (and sweat) are very, very sexy. And then sometimes that passion becomes all consuming, to the exclusion of romance and sex.

Let's not do that, okay? I've already promised to cook more in my skivvies. (I actually have the same outfit as this guy--maybe it'll wear it to inaugurate the first meal in the new apartment?) I also promise that I'll try to keep my food porn obsession from overtaking my..um..you get it. If you feel up to it, post anonymously (or as yourself, if you're brave) about what you plan on doing to keep our more personal and solitary cooking and/or blogging pursuits from interrupting our recreational pursuits, and good luck!

First "Foodie" now "Gastrosexual"? Enough already!

2009-06-23T06:42:00.000-07:00

I think that I've kept my loathing for the neologism "Foodie" quiet for long enough. The man who claims to have coined the term, Dr. Paul Levy, is at it again and he must. be. stopped.

I have an abiding love for language, and as a postmodern feminist I appreciate a little subversive word play. I sprinkle double entendres in my legal briefs from time to time. And I enjoy using violent metaphors in my correspondence to opposing counsel so they know who they are dealing with--because, in fact, I am 5 feet and 2 and 3 quarters inches of pure intimidation sometimes. (FYI, postmodernism is like, soooo late 1990's but I haven't evolved to be a post-postmodern feminist yet...too busy with other things.)

Yes ma'am, I am fairly open to people messing with the English language to further communication in a creative or thought-provoking way. But I do draw the line at inventing and then glamorizing arbitrary culinary concepts and then shoving it down society's collective throat. (Which begs the question, if society has a collective throat, does society have a collective belly? A collective intestine? And what's in it? Ew.)

Foodie? Are you effing kidding me? It reminds me of "boogie," as in, a child-like term for "booger," which essentially infantilizes the English language two-fold. What is the significance of that particular suffix, besides it's grating ability to cutesy up the word "food"? So now what is Dr. Levy up to, besides making me want to claw my eyeballs out every time I hear his meaningless-albeit-spiffy new term for "a person who likes food?"

He has been hired out to PurAsia, one of those companies that makes frozen pad thai for your office lunch, to pimp his new concept--the Gastrosexual. According to his "study," a Gastrosexual is a young male who cooks, and get this--he typically cooks Asian food (pad thai, anyone?)--to impress and seduce his partners.

Now, according to Dr. Levy and company, the Gastrosexual does not do dishes, no sir. Nor does he grocery shop or tidy up around the house before he lays the fish sauce on thick in an effort to get laid. But he does simmer, and chop, and caramelize things, because that is the sexy part of maintaining a household. From the "study":

In some cases it seems that the Gastrosexual maybe using his prowess in the kitchen as a way of contributing to the housework without having to take on the less fulfilling jobs of cleaning the home and washing clothes. Men, on average, spend just four minutes a day washing clothes, less than a quarter of the time spent by women. Professor Melanie Howard supports this theory “Cooking is an efficient contribution to the house given the time you spend ... it means that you’re a good modern bloke and you’re playing your part. But it is actually a more rewarding and creative form of domestic contribution.”

To that I say, Mr. Gastrosexual, I'd lose my clothes in a heartbeat if you'd just do the laundry. But I'll have to insist that you stay the hell out of my kitchen unless you're attending to the dirty dishes. And Dr. Levy? I'm going to publish a study, commissioned by the National Association of Women Who Are Annoyed By You, to investigate the possibility of naming you Dr. Gibberishmonger.

Award Winning Pasta Sauce Recipe!

2009-06-18T07:39:00.000-07:00

Hey ya'll! Today I'm having a rockin' karma day [didn't have to wait for either of my metro trains, I'm having one of those "effortlessly cute" days that come along so infrequently that I tend to forget about them between occurrences, and my morning meeting put me in a great mood] so it's only fitting that I get to share more good news with you...

My Smoked Tomato Pasta Sauce with Portabella & Fennel recipe was selected out of a few hundred entries as a runner-up in the Buitoni Pasta Sauce Recipe Contest! The challenge was to create a sauce that paired with one of Buitoni's new riserva pastas, and I chose to create a sauce that could stand up to their super rich, slightly spicy braised beef and sausage ravioli.

I wanted to impart a wood-grilled flavor onto the ravioli, so I prepped some awesome vegetables for smoking, and threw them on my trusty Weber kettle with some hickory chips. Then I used the smoked veggies with bacon, some strong herbs (fennel, tarragon), and a salty, mild cheese that looks beautiful and added some creamy depth (ricotta salata--it's bright white!) to make a silky, smoky sauce. Voila!

This was my first "cooking contest" entry, so I'm very excited that the people at Foodbuzz.com liked it enough to select it as a runner up. And I get a cool gift pack as a prize, so I'll dish on that once it arrives.

Summer Sides: Southwest Sweet Corn Salad

2009-06-17T02:09:00.000-07:00

Maybe you've realized that in our
house, a "salad" isn't typically made of leafy, green stuff high in folic acid and low in calories. More often, it begins and ends with starch and fat, with some chopped veggies thrown in for color.

Hey, at least I'm consistent!

I make this little "salad" to pair well with saucy, spicy ribs. The flavors are fresh, and the sauce has a nice kick of its own. As a bonus, if you have some of the sauce left over, mix it with some mayo, onion, and bell pepper for a yummy shrimp salad base...

Southwest Sweet Corn Salad

8 small ears sweet corn, boiled or grilled
3 cups of halved cherry tomatoes
1/2 green bell pepper, chopped
1/2 yellow bell pepper, chopped
1/2 red onion, diced

2 Tbs. extra virgin olive oil
3 Tbs. lime juice
1 tsp. sugar
1 tsp. salt
2 tsp. fresh ground black pepper
4 dashes hot sauce
1 tsp. cumin
1 tsp. chili powder
1 tsp. cayenne pepper
1 Tbs. dried oregano
1 cup fresh cilantro, chopped

Cut the kernels (great word!) off of the ears of corn and place them in a large mixing bowl. Add the rest of the vegetables to the bowl. Put the olive oil in a smaller bowl, and whisk in all of the remaining ingredients except the cilantro. Taste, and add more cayenne pepper if it's not hot enough. (The dressing will taste very acidic, but the sweetness of the corn will tone down the lime juice). Stir the desired amount of dressing into the corn/veggie mixture and toss with the cilantro. Let sit for several hours, covered, stirring occasionally. Can be served cold or at room temperature.

Summer Sides: Spicy Asian Sesame Noodle Salad

2009-06-15T13:30:00.000-07:00

A big hug and kiss go out to M'me Williams (aka Meggy Moo) and Liza Jane for this lovely little recipe. This Asian noodle salad is great as a side dish, and if you're potlucking your host is likely to a.) be mad you showed him/her up and/or b.) be grateful that you didn't bring over the 100th bag of ruffle potato chips because they told people to "bring whatever." It's also great as a tasty, healthier lunch entree. Some days, I might even take it over a plateful of cheesecake for dessert, it's that good.

I use the Epicurious recipe, available here, and add whatever veggies strike my fancy in color and flavor, so it's always exactly what I'm in the mood for. In this iteration, I used the sweeter, less acidic yellow bell peppers, and some thinly sliced purple cabbage and carrots. One word of advice--hold out till you can find the sesame oil (typically in the Asian section of your grocery store, and ALWAYS sold out at the Harris Teeter near us). It's absolutely the best part. And if you're not already cooking dishes with fresh ginger (Mom and Dad) I suggest that you get in the habit...ginger can be spicy, floral, and citrus-y all at once and is great in all sorts of marinades and sauces. Pick up some for this Asian Noodle Salad and see what I mean...

Spicy Sesame Noodle Salad:

1 Tbs. peanut oil
2 Tbs. minced peeled fresh ginger
2 garlic cloves, minced
3 Tbs. Asian sesame oil
2 Tbs. soy sauce
2 Tbs. balsamic vinegar
1 1/2 Tbs. sugar
1 Tbs. (or more) hot chili oil
1 1/2 tsp. salt
1 pound prepared linguine pasta
12 green onions, thinly sliced
1/2 cup coarsely chopped roasted peanuts
1/4 cup sliced Thai basil leaves
Sliced vegetables of your choice (I used carrots sliced lengthwise, thin-sliced purple cabbage, and yellow bell pepper rings)
Toasted sesame seeds (optional)

Heat peanut oil in small skillet over medium heat. Add ginger and garlic; sauté 1 minute. Transfer to large bowl. Add next 6 ingredients; whisk to blend.

Drain noodles thoroughly and transfer to bowl with sauce. Add sliced green onions and toss to coat noodles. Let stand at room temperature until noodles have absorbed dressing, tossing occasionally, about 1 hour. Stir in peanuts, sesame seeds, and Thai basil; toss again. Add vegetables of your choice, selecting for taste, color, and texture for best results. Season to taste with salt and pepper. Serve at room temperature.

Tips and Tricks:

If you don't have hot chili oil, add one more Tbs. of sesame oil to the sauce and add crushed red pepper flakes to taste

Two words---Double Batch.